Pratchett's Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about Pratchett's

Pratchett's Quotes & Sayings

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Granny hesitated. "Agnes who calls herself Perditax?"
"Perdita X," said Nanny. She at least respected anyone's right to recreate themselves. — Terry Pratchett

Carpe Jugulum," read Agnes aloud. "That's ... well, Carpe Diem is 'Sieze the Day,' so this means-"
"Go for the throat — Terry Pratchett

I don't think about the end game. I've got lots to occupy my mind. It's the rage that keeps me going. — Terry Pratchett

He's got a box with a demon in it that draws pictures," said Rincewind shortly. "Do what the madman says and he will give you gold. — Terry Pratchett

It's not staying in the same place that's the problem," said Nanny, "it's not letting your mind wander. — Terry Pratchett

There were no lies here. All fancies fled away. That's what happened in all deserts. It was just you, and what you believed. — Terry Pratchett

There's always a lot of pressure with big projects and so as a writer you have to be robust and flexible, with a tough hide. — Rhianna Pratchett

Give anyone a lever long enough and they can change the world. It's unreliable levers that are the problem. — Terry Pratchett

People's whole lives do pass in front of their eye before dying. The process is called Living — Terry Pratchett

What I say is, if a witch can't look after herself, she's got no business calling herself a witch. — Terry Pratchett

Anyone with half a mind could see that," said Tiffany.
Miss Tick sighed. "Yes. But sometimes it's so hard to find half a mind when you need one. — Terry Pratchett

Sooner or later we're all someone's dog. — Terry Pratchett

There's always something to eat, if you're hungry enough. — Terry Pratchett

You mean it's my destiny? she said at last.
Granny shrugged. Something like that. Probably. Who knows? — Terry Pratchett

This is no way to treat a book," he said. "Look, he's bent the spine right back. People always do that, they've got no idea of how to treat them. — Terry Pratchett

It's hard enough bein' people as it is, without other people coming and messin' you around. — Terry Pratchett

Just because someone's a member of an ethnic minority doesn't mean they're not a nasty small-minded little jerk. — Terry Pratchett

The little man's total obliviousness to all forms of danger somehow made danger so discouraged that it gave up and went away. — Terry Pratchett

High magic requires a great clarity of thought, you see, and women's talents do not lie in that direction. Their brains tend to overheat. — Terry Pratchett

Falling isn't so bad, you know. It's only the landing that hurts. — Terry Pratchett

It occurred to me that at one point it was like I had two diseases - one was Alzheimer's, and the other was knowing I had Alzheimer's. — Terry Pratchett

It's tough at the top. It's tough at the bottom. But in between you could use them for horse-shoes. — Terry Pratchett

There had been plenty of singers whose high notes could smash a glass but Nanny's high C could clean it. — Terry Pratchett

It's all bloody lies about the sea. It's just all yuk with lobsters in it. — Terry Pratchett

It's . . . it's like a legend! It has to happen! — Terry Pratchett

Do you think that's a good idea, sir?'
'Yes, sergeant, I do. It was one of mine. — Terry Pratchett

There's always the dwarf bread. — Terry Pratchett

Sometimes answeres can change everything. — Rhianna Pratchett

Moist realized that there had to be an explanation for this, but the only one he could think of now was: It's strange. — Terry Pratchett

Humanity's a nice place to visit, but you wouldn't want to live there. — Terry Pratchett

If he'd been a hero, he would have taken the opportunity to say, "That's what I call sorted!" Since he wasn't a hero, he threw up. — Terry Pratchett

I'm sure it's all journalism [ ... ] It means it's true enough for now. — Terry Pratchett

There are so mane shades of gray."
"Nope."
"Pardon?"
"Thers's no grays, only white that's got grubby ... — Terry Pratchett

For wolves and pigs and bears, thinking that they're human is a tragedy. For a cat, it's an experience. — Terry Pratchett

It's an unfair world, Child. Be glad you have friends. — Terry Pratchett

Just because a woman's got no teeth doesn't mean she's wise. It might just mean she's been stupid for a very long time. — Terry Pratchett

And he goes around killing people?" said Mort. He shook his head. "There's no justice."
Death sighed. No, he said ... there's just me. — Terry Pratchett

Nothing's louder than the
end of a song that's always been there. — Terry Pratchett

I don't see what's so triffic about creating people as people and then gettin' upset 'cos they act like people. — Terry Pratchett

I think the best thing I ever did with my life was stand up and say I've got Alzheimer's. — Terry Pratchett

I mean, it's a good job we've got a last desperate million-to-one chance to rely on, or we'd really be in trouble! — Terry Pratchett

Are you a philosopher? Where's your sponge? — Terry Pratchett

Sun's coming up," he announced. "Don't remember eating that," muttered Chidder. — Terry Pratchett

So I had to learn. All my life. The hard way. And the hard way's pretty hard, but not so hard as the easy way. I learned. — Terry Pratchett

Quick, someone's coming! Look real! — Terry Pratchett

This isn't life in the fast lane, it's life in the oncoming traffic. — Terry Pratchett

This is Art holding a Mirror up to Life. That's why everything is exactly the wrong way around. — Terry Pratchett

The figures looked more or less human. And they were engaged in religion. You could tell by the knives (it's not murder if you do it for a god). — Terry Pratchett

Things were always better than they are now. It's in the nature of things. — Terry Pratchett

I think it's IMPOSSIBLE for anyone famous to come from here, because everyone around here is insane. — Terry Pratchett

Destiny is important, see, but people go wrong when they think it controls them. It's the other way around. — Terry Pratchett

Its the same everywhere. If you want big grief, look to the ladies. — Terry Pratchett

Ach, people are always telling us not to do things" said Rob Anybody, "that's how we ken the most interesting things to do. — Terry Pratchett

You see, it's not enough to know what the future is. You have to know what it means. — Terry Pratchett

Look at it like this, it's not that we're making life, we're simply giving life a place to live. — Terry Pratchett

He'll just track us down and follow us and then he'll kill Carrot!"
"Why?"
"Because Carrot's mine! — Terry Pratchett

Daphne's thought in Nation:
This was no time to go totally mad. You had to maintain standards. — Terry Pratchett

Terry Pratchett's right up my alley ... give him a try! — Piers Anthony

Death was just like going into another room. The difference is, when you shout, "Where's my clean socks?," no one answers. — Terry Pratchett

And, as always happens, and happens far too soon, the strange and wonderful becomes a memory and a memory becomes a dream. Tomorrow it's gone. — Terry Pratchett

You'll learn there is another rule. Esme's obeyed it all her life." "And what's that?" "When you break rules, break 'em good and hard," said — Terry Pratchett

My personal theory is that he has a very firm grasp upon reality, it's simply not a reality the rest of us have ever met before. — Terry Pratchett

The enemy isn't men, or women, it's bloody stupid people and no one has the right to be stupid. — Terry Pratchett

It's still magic even if you know how it's done. — Terry Pratchett

The trouble with a target-rich environment is that it's useless if you don't know which target you have to aim at. — Terry Pratchett

Build a man a fire and he's warm for a day," I said. "But set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life. Tao of Pratchett. — Jim Butcher

Where there's life, eh?"

WHERE THERE'S LIFE EH WHAT?

"There's hope?"

IS THERE? — Terry Pratchett

Well, he thought, so this is diplomacy. It's lying, only for a better class of people. — Terry Pratchett

When it's time to stop living, I will certainly make Death my number one choice! — Terry Pratchett

How do you get shadows when there's no sun in the sky? she thought, because it was better to think about things like this than all the other, much — Terry Pratchett

No one knows how to do officering, Fred. That's why they're officers. If they knew anything, they'd be sergeants. — Terry Pratchett

Welcome to fear, said Moist to himself. It's hope, turned inside out. You know it can't go wrong, you're sure it can't go wrong ... But it might. — Terry Pratchett

Vimes's lack of interest in other people's children was limitless. — Terry Pratchett

Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out til too late that he's been playing with two queens all along. — Terry Pratchett

There's some things we can't think because we don't know the words. — Terry Pratchett

Romancin' is verra important, ye ken. Basically it's a way the boy can get close to the girl wi'oot her attackin' him and scratchin' his eyes oot. — Terry Pratchett

If you want something done, give it to someone who's busy! — Terry Pratchett

What's a political?"
"Like a spy, but on your own side," said Maladict — Terry Pratchett

Are you sure you're allowed to do this?" she said. "No! I'm not! I won't know until after I've done it! That's why I've got to do it! Then I'll know! — Terry Pratchett

No. The old gods ain't big on 'sorry,'" said Granny, pacing up and down again. "They know it's just a word. — Terry Pratchett

Bishops move diagonally. That's why they often turn up where the kings don't expect them to be. — Terry Pratchett

My name is immaterial,' she said.
That's a pretty name,' said Rincewind. — Terry Pratchett

There's nothing like millions of years of really frustrating trial and error to give a species moral fibre — Terry Pratchett

With the grin of one who mistakenly thinks he's a wit when he's only half a one. — Terry Pratchett

It's a mistake trying to cheer up camels. You may as well drop meringues into a black hole. — Terry Pratchett

He's a man of few words, and he doesn't know what either of them means, people said, but not when he was within hearing. — Terry Pratchett

Sooner or later, it's all about the soul. — Terry Pratchett

There isn't a way things should be. There's just what happens, and what we do. — Terry Pratchett

EMOTIONS GET LEFT BEHIND, IT'S ALL A MATTER OF GLANDS. — Terry Pratchett

Look, sir, I know Angua. She's not the useless type. She doesn't stand there and scream helplessly. She makes other people do that. — Terry Pratchett

The Weatherwax women have always had one foot in shadow. It's in the blood. And most of their power comes from denying it. — Terry Pratchett

I don't think it's weak to admit you made a mistake. That takes strength, if you ask me. — Terry Pratchett

There's always hope."
"So? There's always taxes, too. It doesn't make any difference. — Terry Pratchett

Mort glanced sideways at the top of Ysabell's dress, which contained enough puppy fat for two litters of Rottweilers, and forbore to comment. — Terry Pratchett

Heaven has no taste."
"Now-"
"And not one single sushi restaurant."
A look of pain crossed the angel's suddenly very serious face. — Terry Pratchett

Interest? What's money interested in?' 'More money — Terry Pratchett

- YOU SHOULD HAVE WORKED OUT BY NOW THAT EVERYONE GETS WHAT THEY THINK IS COMING TO THEM. IT'S SO MUCH NEATER THAT WAY. — Terry Pratchett

Time travel was only a kind of magic, after all. That's why it always went wrong. — Terry Pratchett

There's no educating a smart boy. — Terry Pratchett

Gossiping's part of witchcraft,' said Tiffany. 'They're checking to see if they've gone batty yet. — Terry Pratchett