Funny Officer Quotes

'Come back here, I'm a police officer!' and I shouted back 'No you're not! You're a monster!' — Russell Howard

I sometimes wonder how you live with such a modest sense of romance," Barrett says. "Superstition and romance are not the same thing. — Michael Cunningham

Officer, I know I was going faster than 55MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the
road an hour. — Steven Wright

I'm half-Japanese, so I collect toys, like a Yayoi Kusama stuffed pumpkin. — Nicola Formichetti

The M.F.A. is a degree in servitude. It is a way to keep writing safe - to keep reading safe from writing. — Joshua Cohen

I Was Fool Iam Fool But Don't wanna B Fool For My Entire Life ... — Akshay Dubey

No, officer, I have no idea why I'm wearing this possum costume. I called you what? OH. My bad.
-Nastasya — Cate Tiernan

For some reason, no matter what happens in my life, I always seem to have a piece of my heart that says everything is going to be okay. — Jeff Gordon