A Joke Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about A Joke
A Joke Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational A Joke quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
Laugh a little when the joke's on you
— Helen Gurley Brown
I am still capable of feeling used. I am still capable of having a sexual experience that makes me feel like my entire life has been a mean joke.
— Charlotte Shane
Somebody cracks a joke, a whole row laughs, one witticism sets off another, and, like matches, they flare up and burn down.
— Joseph Roth
I've never revved my car at a light for an attractive woman or an auto-rival, not even as a joke.
— Penn Jillette
The next best thing to a very good joke is a very bad one.
— Julius Charles Hare
I do wear wigs ... I sometimes make the joke about me standing on a hilltop with my hair blowing in the wind - and me too proud to run after it.
— Dolly Parton
A true Englishman doesn't joke when he is talking about so serious a thing as a wager.
— Jules Verne
It's an ongoing joke that a black man is always the first one to get killed in movies.
— J. B. Smoove
The Canadian-Australian mathematician Norman Wildberger has posted an essay arguing that real numbers are a joke.
— Max Tegmark
It started out as kind of a joke, and then it wasn't funny anymore because money became involved. Deep down, nothing about money is funny.
— Charles Willeford
Everything serious that he says is a joke and everything humorous that he says is dead serious.
— Clarence Darrow
This was another fossil of a joke. I couldn't remember where it'd come from, I had a horrible feeling it might have been me.
— Alexis Hall
One should never risk a joke, even of the mildest and most unexceptional charters, except among people of culture and wit.
— Jean De La Bruyere
My dear Boris, can you not take a joke?" "Was it a joke?
— Agatha Christie
Imagination is no Joke, But a Wish
— Jan Jansen
Playing quarterback ... it's no joke ... The difference here with Johnny Manziel, there's a lot of style and very little substance.
— Boomer Esiason
I am a rune a carrot a little joke
— Walter Wykes
Don't have every dialog go in a straight line to solve the problem. Let your characters argue, be sarcastic, disagree or joke around.
— Dan Alatorre
One would understand a ban on surrogate advertising, but to completely ban [smoking] is ridiculous, a joke taken too far.
— Mahesh Bhatt
There is nothing that's off limits. If people think something is off limits, I make it my business to go make a joke about it; that's my job.
— Anthony Jeselnik
The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet.
— Oliver Herford
There used to be an old bad joke. I hope it's not so much a good joke anymore. 'Everybody's from Scranton; no one's in Scranton.'
— Joe Biden
With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke.
— Will Rogers
All of a sudden, making a Spanish-American War joke. I think you sort of had to go to probably to an American high school to have remembered that.
— David Mandel
23 Doing wrong is j like a joke to a fool, but k wisdom is pleasure to a man of understanding.
— Anonymous
Wanna play a joke on your chiropractor? The next time he starts working on you, go limp and soil yourself.
— Mike Wilmot
Crave, v.: Nothing makes me feel as welcome in the world as the sound of you laughing at a joke I've made.
— David Levithan
It's a cosmic joke that I'm a lesbian, because I understand men so well but women are a complete mystery to me.
— Lea DeLaria
Comedy has always been important in my family. If you got in a good joke at the dinner table, it meant more than almost anything else.
— Isla Fisher
I'm a really stoic artist. I'm serious a lot of times. I can joke and play sometimes, but most of the time, I'm stoic.
— LeCrae
In my stories I kill off every love scene with a joke. Don't try this at home.
— Shelley Malec Vitale
Sometimes, the universe just does what the universe wants to do, and screw you if you can't take a joke. I
— Elliott James
Your blindness to my downfall,
Has gone too far to be a joke,
As I stand ablaze before you,
And you tell me you smell smoke. — Erin Hanson
Has gone too far to be a joke,
As I stand ablaze before you,
And you tell me you smell smoke. — Erin Hanson
Lacroix has been fantastic. He's very nice. He gets the joke, and I think that's a good thing.
— Jennifer Saunders
Thought you were making a James Band Joke. Hard to tell with that accent
— G. Norman Lippert
In a perfect
world I would be taller, you would be alive,
and chickens could cross the road without
being the subject of a joke. — Suzanne Wrightt
world I would be taller, you would be alive,
and chickens could cross the road without
being the subject of a joke. — Suzanne Wrightt
The whole Universe is a large joke. Everything in the Universe are just subdivisions of this joke. So why take anything too serious.
— Frank Zappa
As if life were a joke, and heaven the place where the cosmic punchline is finally explained to us. There
— Stephen King
For Europeans a president having an affair, especially in France, is a joke. No one cares, it would never bring this kind of trouble to a country.
— Julie Delpy
We end up kissing her for an hour, and her lips are so soft they are almost like a joke.
— Aimee Bender
He lit his pipe again, smiling to himself quietly, with that painful smile of his, as though he were enjoying a joke that hurt him.
— W. Somerset Maugham
For with dandies, a joke is the only way of making yourself respected.
— Jules Barbey D'Aurevilly
Now, why would a dead girl lie?
Hey! That sounds like a joke. Why would a dead girl lie? Answer: Because she can't stand up. — Jay Asher
Hey! That sounds like a joke. Why would a dead girl lie? Answer: Because she can't stand up. — Jay Asher
There is a joke that your hammer will always find nails to hit. I find that perfectly acceptable.
— Benoit Mandelbrot
Many a man was caused to perish by something that he and many men cherish.
— Mokokoma Mokhonoana
The economy is a thoughtless weather system- and nothing more. Some joke on the people, to give them such a thing
— Kurt Vonnegut
Ain't singing for Pepsi, ain't singing for Coke, I don't sing for nobody, makes me look like a joke.
— Neil Young
I don't like jokes in speeches. I do like wit and humor. A joke is to humor what pornography is to erotic language in a good novel.
— James C. Humes
Korean feminism has been swept away by popular culture. It became a sort of old-fashioned trend or a joke.
— Kim Hyesoon
My father was the kind of guy who'd always say 'Throw out any subject and I got a joke on it.'
— Carol Leifer
Your skin is white, but I think the white god made a mistake, or maybe he did it on purpose to play a joke. He gave you an Apache heart.
— Ellen O'Connell
Pity, I've learned, is like a fart. You can tolerate your own, but you simply can't stand anyone else's.
— Jonathan Tropper
Snake pulled out the digital camera and decided to play a joke on Otacon. He snapped a picture of the pinup, muttered, "Good," and closed the door.
— Raymond Benson
The marvelous thing about a joke with a double meaning is that it can only mean one thing.
— Ronnie Barker
Life is cruel. Love is a joke. And not even death is final.
— Corinne Michaels
This is fun, Matty, isn't it? Cocktail hour is intoxicating." "It is." "I made a little joke there." - Celeste.
— Jessica Park
I joke that a person of color would never make a movie like 'Midnight in Paris.' Nostalgia isn't so enticing.
— Meshell Ndegeocello
You make a joke out of everything.
Life's too painful not to. — Richelle Mead
Life's too painful not to. — Richelle Mead
The public is gullible ... If [many satirists are] making the same joke, that's the danger. Then there's a solidifying effect and it becomes a truth.
— Bill Maher
Completely committed to adapting 'Fifty Shades of Grey'. This is not a joke. Christian Grey and Ana: potentially great cinematic characters.
— Bret Easton Ellis
Nothing's a joke with me. It just all comes out like one.
— Lorrie Moore
Directing a movie is serious, it's not a joke.
— Fred Durst
A comic strip has a rhythm and a pattern, and you got to get in and out quick. So you set up a joke, tell the joke, and done.
— Stephan Pastis
Medicine is a very old joke, but it still goes on.
— Andre Maurois
He was not a practical joke nor was he a fool but he was determinedly original and had a vague and modest idea of himself as a legendary figure.
— John Cheever
That was Chas. Furious and black-hearted one minute, ready to crack a wry joke the next.
— Colleen Gleason
I used to crack A joke when Sourav Ganguly is upset and make him happy , i usually speak in bengali which would make him laugh
— Sachin Tendulkar
Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense.
— Alan Moore
A good joke doesn't necessarily need appreciation from others. One can freely laugh at one's own deserving jokes.
— Pawan Mishra
The future of this nation, with the present generation, You must admit is nothing but a joke
— Ira Gershwin
I get just as much of a thrill out of constructing a good sentence that gets a laugh at the end as I do from a joke.
— Julian Clary
I really like comedy. There's always a choice, when you're writing: you can either go for the joke or you can go for the story, the important stuff.
— David Chase
Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you are kidding.
— Lemony Snicket
But giving drugs to a cat is no joke, Kemp!
— H.G.Wells
I'm not much of a joke writer.
— Ben Falcone
In Classical Greek the word pathos was the same for both suffering and experience. Those Greeks knew a good joke when they heard one.
— Peter Straub
A lot of comedies fall apart because they just go from joke to joke, and the characters are all sort of being crazy off on their own.
— Paul Feig
A joke is like building a mousetrap from scratch. You have to work pretty hard to make the thing snap when it is supposed to snap.
— Kurt Vonnegut
My first joke was about a company called Five Star Parking that was all over Philadelphia: 'Who's reviewing parking lots?'
— Adam McKay
If I should ever die, God forbid, I hope you will say, 'Kurt is up in heaven now.' That's my favorite joke.
— Kurt Vonnegut
Running for me is a sport. It's not a joke. It's serious.
— J. R. Martinez
I think that all filth is local ... and that a joke isn't a joke unless it's at somebody's expense
— Christopher Hitchens
the sign of a completely healthy mind is the ability to tell a truly sick joke or make a sick comment and laugh at it yourself.
— L. Lee Watkins
[When] you're dying laughing because your three-year-old made a fart joke, it doesn't matter what else is going on. That's real happiness.
— Gwyneth Paltrow
It is almost a joke, but a joke that nobody tells.
— Hilary Mantel