Michael Ian Black quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Michael Ian Black

Michael Ian Black Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Michael Ian Black on Wise Famous Quotes.

If you get an idea, you might as well stick with it until somebody calls you on it.

Your harshest critic is always going to be yourself. Don't ignore that critic but don't give it more attention than it deserves.

Even to me, a sufferer, 'depression' seems like a fetid load of weaselly claptrap, a cheap and easy excuse for not participating in life.

Choose hope over fear.

Did my fingering turn you gay? I hope not.

I don't necessarily self-identify as a writer, 'cause it implies a certain level of intelligence.

With stand-up, you can be as freeform as you want to be. You can say what you want, how you want, at any moment without constraint.

Whenever anyone asks me if I'm from a TV show, I say yes - no matter whether I've ever been on it. It just makes the conversation that much easier.

That's been my fear all along. That I'm not enough, and I still don't trust at all that I am.

I think writing for anybody helps you order your life. It helps you arrange your emotions and your thoughts and it helps to provide perspective.

The global business climate is likewhatever, dude.

I think in doing stand-up there are no rules and there's no architecture.

Wish I could, through my own financial prestidigitation, transform a dollar bill into two, or two million. It is an awesome and mysterious skill.

I don't chase after things, but I put forward the effort and know the rest of it is out of my hands.

The things I care about are the most pedestrian things in the world. I care about good ice cream and being a good dad and a decent husband.

There's things I know I'm good at, and those things interest me less and less. I learn a lot more from doing it wrong than I do from doing it right.

I feel like my career has been a series of glowing obituaries.

Well, I think my stand-up is often kind of visual. Not like Carrot Top visual, but visual.

If I have any faith at all, I guess that's it. Faith in the small love that keeps our family together.

If I had three wishes for my country, they would be these: keep fighting, keep moving forward, and don't act like a douchebag.

Whatever I write I publish. Because that's where the money is.

Separation is the worst. There's no good way to deal with it, other than to get on the phone and do Skype and try to visit.

Hosting a show, even a talk show or a game show, there's so much business you have to conduct. There's so much guiding you have to do.

I don't really read children's books or deal with children's books, so I don't have any relationship with them other than my own.

Everybody has something they love to do. Do that thing.

I can be a snarky Asshole, or I can be sort of mentally impaired. It's very hard for me to just be normal human being.

Cluelessness is not an attractive quality in a man.

Internet fame is like regular fame only without all the annoying 'money' and 'power.'

Write more thank-you cards, but draw fewer swastikas on them.

Super excited about things I'm going to do; never excited about things I'm actually doing.

Corporations do a lot of things well, but not run nations, for obvious reasons.

It doesn't matter what you're chasing, when you get there you're gonna be like, "Oh, is this all? It kind of sucks."

So my reaction to hearing this corny-ass, horrible song ["With Arms Wide Open" by Creed] is violent, uncontrollable, sustained weeping.

Many, many people can write books. I just happen to be one of them.

I'll never admit that I'm an actor, because the next horrible follow-up question is always, "Oh, what have I seen you in?"

If they have to drag some of you fucking fuckers out of here in body bags, I will be so fucking stoked.

I take my coffee the same way I take my women: Strong, black, and proud.

Part of what's exciting to me about my career is the constant looking forward. Whenever I finish one project, I am looking to what's next.

Shuffling really isn't something you should be doing on your deathbed.

I hope you die ...
P.S. If you do die, I'm going to go to the funeral and finger your corpse.

The illustrators work so much harder on the books than the writers do. I mean, that's so much work doing what they do, and it's terrible for them.

I don't watch that much comedy. I think it's professional jealousy. That and a lack of support for my community.

You keep your gods in your backyard and I'll keep my lack of God in mine.

The Atkins' diet is where you eat bacon for six or seven months ... and the end result is that you lose weight. Because you're dead.

The characters that I have on Twitter have very little resemblance to me, the person who's writing them.

People recognize me, but they don't know where from. Today I was in the elevator and somebody asked me if I worked for his company.

I imagine there's a level of narcissism that goes into thinking you're enough.

I am a poker player, but I am not a good poker player. My favorite game is seven card stud, but I'll play hi/lo, Hold 'em, Razz, etc.

I think people just love to win.