Jeff Strand Quotes

Top 12 wise famous quotes and sayings by Jeff Strand

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Jeff Strand quotes: But being hit in the face with monkey poo is something that, deep inside, we all believe happens only to other people. But being hit in the face with monkey poo is something that, deep inside, we all believe happens only to other people.
Jeff Strand quotes: What was he supposed to do besides break the living room window? Stand outside whacking off while she grabbed a cell phone and called for help? What was he supposed to do besides break the living room window? Stand outside whacking off while she grabbed a cell phone and called for help?
Jeff Strand quotes: Is someone in my tree?" I fought panic, and through Herculean effort managed to keep my pants dry. "No," I answered. She wasn't fooled. Is someone in my tree?" I fought panic, and through Herculean effort managed to keep my pants dry. "No," I answered. She wasn't fooled.
Jeff Strand quotes: Culinary incompetence could explain the first six or seven meals, but more than that had to be culinary malice. Culinary incompetence could explain the first six or seven meals, but more than that had to be culinary malice.
Jeff Strand quotes: How about we meet tomorrow at Von's Gym, 6 A.M.?" I'd heard rumors that such an hour of the morning existed, but thus far it had been unconfirmed. How about we meet tomorrow at Von's Gym, 6 A.M.?" I'd heard rumors that such an hour of the morning existed, but thus far it had been unconfirmed.
Jeff Strand quotes: They both had sub-machine guns. Yes, actual sub-machine guns. I couldn't believe it. They both had sub-machine guns. Yes, actual sub-machine guns. I couldn't believe it.
Jeff Strand quotes: When I was little, my dad used to say, "Son, guilt doesn't make a very fluffy pillow. When I was little, my dad used to say, "Son, guilt doesn't make a very fluffy pillow.
Jeff Strand quotes: Tipsy isn't a miracle wonder cat. That was always the deal: you'd get your cat back, but he'd be sort of creepy. We discussed this. Tipsy isn't a miracle wonder cat. That was always the deal: you'd get your cat back, but he'd be sort of creepy. We discussed this.