Rachel Renee Russell Quotes

Mom, I don't need a STUPID book with 288 BLANK pages!!

NIKKI: Yep! I'm trying to help her earn a cooking badge for Scouts. Any ideas for a super-EZ brat-proof snack? BRANDON:

In spite of her cute little angelic face and pink sneakers, Brianna is actually a baby Tyrannosaurus rex. On STEROIDS!

Miss Penelope THINKS I need beauty sleep?! Sorry, Brianna, but Miss Penelope CAN'T think. She doesn't have a BRAIN! She's a hand puppet!" I shot back.

Wicked Witch of the West

Sure, I sort of hated that girl a little bit. But I'd NEVER go

Calling MacKenzie a mean girl is an understatement. She's a cobra with hoop earrings, blond hair extensions, and a spray-on tan.

The Hawk's keen nose is picking up the scent of a COWARD! Right . . . about . . . HERE! he snarled, and pointed at ME!

And why does it smell like something DIED in the mud and is STILL in there rotting?

there's something really important I need to tell YOU!" He

Mean fake advice letters to students, and spreading lies and nasty rumors. And

just say . . . ?!

BTW, the roach's name is Max (courtesy of Brianna, "because of I had a puppy, I'd name him Max").

my butt cheeks had frozen into two big chunks of ice.

Wine intoxicates for a time, but the end is bitterness.

Then he evacuated all the students from the classroom because

Then she slammed her locker shut and sashayed away. I just HATE it when MacKenzie sashays.

So, how was your week at Hogwarts? Luv the tacky uniforms (LOL)! NIKKI:

So many FREAKS and not enough CIRCUSES!

My bad!" She giggled. "Sugar makes me chatty.

unanswered questions

WHAAAT?! No way! Brandon, You said you couldn't go

Hey, I'm so BROKE, I have a milkshake on layaway at McDonald's!

And while we worked, we had a serious chat. BRANDON

Kincaid after class, she told me I was in bio, not ART class. Then she

I'm SUCH a DORK!!

Idea the situation was so bad until I asked each committee member to present a status report at our meeting this morning.

Attention, there was an incessant gnawing deep down inside my gut that

Well, I'm really sorry to disappoint those snobby CCPs!

my advice column is going

DAD, MAX THE ROACH, AND OUR RAGGEDY OLD VAN WERE BACK WHERE THEY BELONGED!

You're such a big BABY. So cry me a river, build yourself a bridge, and GET OVER IT

Okay, I'll admit it. That part was MY fault! I just

Sweetie, when life presents challenges, you can be either a CHICKEN or a CHAMPION. The choice is YOURS!

Felt SO insanely happy I could just ... VOMIT sunshine, rainbows, confetti, glitter and ... um ... those yummy little Skittles thingies!

Well, it's not MY fault you're such an AIRHEAD that if you open your mouth I can hear the ocean! I shot back.

So Brandon, would you like to take... A POP QUIZ??!!

Hey, get a load of those two! It must be mating season or something ...

This morning I had these fluttery butterflies in my stomach that were making me feel SUPERnauseous

So I just smiled, thanked

The Price Is Right for Morons.

In the blank where it said "Name of act," I had scrawled, "Actually, I'm not really sure

Brandon for being excited about the student exchange

Mr. Biz! The shrewd and savage business shark,

The next my parents and Brianna come rollin' up in here, I'm gonna scream, Hey! Why don't y'all just MOVE IN?!

And another hour to scrape seven of them off the stove, floor, and ceiling. . . .

And nails done, right after she visited the school nurse,

Dream big dreams,because little dreams have no magic.~Dork Diaries

Then she cackled like a witch and sashayed away. I just HATE it when MacKenzie sashays. But

That's So Hot! magazine

toilet-papered your house!

It's easy to take people you really care about for granted. Then, one day, they're out of your life.

Let your inner DORK shine through.

I AM !! Jealous much?!

Better late than never."-Dork Diaries

I'll pluck out my eye with a pencil and eat it with a Spam and mustard sandwich IF ONLY you'll sit me at lunch today, MacKenzie!

We were supposed to be brainstorming. But, unfortunately, my brain was farting.