Good Funny Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Good Funny
Good Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Good Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
The mark of a good party is that you wake up the next morning wanting to change your name and start a new life in a different city.
— Vance Bourjaily
I want to get back and figure out how we're going to make 'The Tonight Show' funny and good.
— Andy Richter
My mom's been having a hard time lately. She just found out that she has to have both of her breasts removed - if she's ever going to be good at golf.
— Anthony Jeselnik
You're so full of shit, you ought to be a cow manure
— Sherrilyn Kenyon
The sooner the jihadis go up to their imagined #heaven, the sooner our earth would be a heaven.
— Fakeer Ishavardas
I saw on HBO they were advertising a boxing match "It's a fight to the finish". That's a good place to end.
— Mitch Hedberg
Men were good for one thing only. Killing spiders. Other than that, I was on my own. It was sad though. Where was the chivalry of yesteryear?
— Kate Carlisle
A good time for laughing is when you can.
— Jessamyn West
My parents are both really, really funny, and my little sister is a really good painter, and my other sister is a really good writer.
— Michael Cera
And what have you been up to? she asked.Oh, I don't know really, I said. Not much. Learning how to be a good loser. — Miriam Toews
We're like the couple on the sitcom that has good sparks but never get together for the sake of ratings.
— Aimee Bender
I am not fake, I am just too good to be true (-:
— Mahsati Abdul
I honestly love any good chick flick, as long as it's a good movie or pretty funny. 'Love Actually' is a no-brainer.
— Matt McGorry
Really, if the lower orders don't set a good example, what on earth is the use of them?
— Oscar Wilde
Those sweet lips. My, oh my, I could kiss those lips all night long.Good things come to those who wait. — Jess C. Scott
My father taught me a good lesson: Don't get to low when things go wrong. And don't get too high when things are good.
— Robert Parish
To solve the human equation, we need to add love, subtract hate, multiply good, and divide between truth and error.
— Janet Coleman
What do you think Dimitri? Is this a good idea, Dimitri? Please give us your blessing so that we can fall down and worship you, Dimitri.
— Richelle Mead
Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug.
— Steven Wright
A good story should provoke discussion, debate, argument ... and the occasional bar fight.
— J. Michael Straczynski
He looked at the cash siting there "What's that for?" I made myself smile "A good time.
— Kasie West
It's funny, I can sit through the worst horror film ever made but even a quite good romantic comedy can drive me nuts.
— Jason Reitman
You deserve good sperm. You've waited a long time.
— Buffy Andrews
A good artist is willing to die many times over. What's funny is, I've died so many times.
— Billy Corgan
Posting dramatic charts or funny pictures is good and giving people smart reasons to believe what they already think is great.
— Derek Thompson
Good painter imitates nature, bad ones spews it up.
— Miguel De Cervantes
You ever tried sixty-nine, Lola? I think you'd like it. You're a good multi-tasker.
— Bianca Giovanni
It's a cold night out tonight. The Padres better warm up real good because it's stiff out there.
— Jerry Coleman
Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when they're having a good time, I can carry on the joke.
— John Krasinski
To do nothing is sometimes a good remedy.
— Hippocrates
Mama is funny. She has a great sense of humor and loves a good joke. Loves a practical joke, too.
— Reba McEntire
I don't like driving very much. That makes me very unhappy, because I scream a lot in the car, but other than that, life is actually pretty good.
— Whoopi Goldberg
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.' But eating too many, is quite enough-plenty. And you'll have to go see the good doc anyway.
— Solange Nicole
No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.
— Freddie Mercury
I'm good at being funny.
— Tom Stoppard
Orgasms are a myth. Like good credit scores.
— Kelly Moran
I'm sure I look a wreck. But he's the one who wrecked me so he may as well take a good long look at what he's done.
— Monica Murphy
It was funny because she thought of herself as a good team player, although sometimes she suspected that no one else on her team did.
— Kate Atkinson
I'm good at blowjob.
— Lauren Baker
A couple weeks ago I was on the street and I saw an ugly pregnant lady, and I just thought, 'Good for you.'
— Demetri Martin
Go take a shower, you smell like good sex and unnecessary regret.
— Cassandra Giovanni
If you have spent any time with Barack Obama, you know he's a funny guy. He's a good guy. He knows sports.
— Ed Rendell
My condolences, you're still alive.
— Fakeer Ishavardas
Offering Dragons quarter is no good, they regrow all their parts and come on again. They have to be killed.
— John Berryman
This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth.
— P.G. Wodehouse
A car hit a Jewish man. The paramedic says, "Are you comfortable?" The man says, "I make a good living."
— Henny Youngman
Love is a funny thing. It can make you the happiest person in the world when it's good, but when it goes bad, it can crush you beyond recognition.
— Courtney Giardina
I feel no grief for being called somethingwhich
I am not;
in fact, it's enthralling, somehow, like a good
back rub — Charles Bukowski
Sometimes it's good to be the smartest rat in the sewer.
— Michael Houbrick
It's all about one split-second. Boxing is a funny thing. You blink your eyes and somebody says good night to you.
— Kostya Tszyu
Size does matter. There's a lot of ways to make people feel good, but personally I think it does enhance things.
— Pamela Anderson
Snake pulled out the digital camera and decided to play a joke on Otacon. He snapped a picture of the pinup, muttered, "Good," and closed the door.
— Raymond Benson
I wish they made fajita cologne, because that stuff smells good. What's that you're wearing? That's sizzlin'!
— Mitch Hedberg
A man can well afford to be as bold as brass, my good fellow, when he gets gold in exchange!
— Charles Dickens
They have dog food for constipated dogs. If your dog is constipated, why screw up a good thing? Stay indoors and let 'em bloat!
— David Letterman
I came up with a good idea ... see-through skin.
— Karl Pilkington
That Asian guy is really good at kicking. Shocking. Someone is pressing 'A' really fast somewhere.
— Daniel Tosh
Never miss a party ... good for the nerveslike celery. — F Scott Fitzgerald
I'm good at coming up with wacky characters and funny dialogue.
— Marlon Wayans
Funny is not a color. Being black is only good from the time you get from the curtain to the microphone.
— Flip Wilson
Girls are like Pokemon, it doesn't matter how good you are, you can't catch any if you don't have any balls.
— Auliq Ice
I'm alive," he groaned. "But I'm not doing a very good job of it.
— Merrie Haskell
![Good Funny Quotes By Groucho Marx: [Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart.](https://www.wisefamousquotes.com/images/good-funny-quotes-by-groucho-marx-353774.jpg "Good Funny Quotes By Groucho Marx: [Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart.")
[Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart. [Groucho]: A lot of good that'll do him. He's still got the same face.
— Groucho Marx
I thank God daily for the good fortune of my birth, for I am certain I would have made a miserable peasant.
— C.S. Forester
What turns an honest, good-looking guy like you into a theif?" Scott couldn't help but smirk.
"I blame chocolate. — Geoffrey Knight
The hateful reviews are very funny. And sometimes you can enjoy a hateful review much more than a good review.
— Gaspar Noe
Good things come to those who hustle
— Chuck Noll
A comedian does funny things. A good comedian does things funny.
— Buster Keaton
I happen to be very good with younger actors because I have extremely vivid memories of that time of my life, and kids are just funny.
— David M. Evans
Yes, I believe blue material is funny, but if that's all you've got, you're dead in the water. It's not good.
— Howard Stern
