Funny Bed Quotes
Collection of top 52 famous quotes about Funny Bed
Funny Bed Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Bed quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
I finally got up around noon, after having decided that, as far as monogamous relationships go, I could probably do worse than marrying my bed.
— Robyn Schneider
Just rolled out of bed." "I can see that." His eyes swept over me. "You should roll around in your bed more often. — Veronica Blade
Look, if I'd wanted a lecture on the rights of man, I'd have gone to bed with Martin Luther.
— Rowan Atkinson
We were told four years ago that 17 million people went to bed hungry every night. Well, that was probably true. They were all on a diet.
— Ronald Reagan
I always wondered about that woman who had that face transplant. If you went to bed with her, would that technically count as a threesome?
— Frankie Boyle
So I went to bed, full, happy, and caring nothing for all the hurt of all the englished Welshmen that ever festered upon a proud land
— Richard Llewellyn
me in bed - with a honeymoon present. Some of them were small, some were funny jokes, and some were extravagant, but every present came straight
— James Patterson
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
— Groucho Marx
I was just in London - there is a 6 hour time difference. I'm still confused. When I go to dinner, I feel sexy. When I go to bed, I feel hungry.
— Henny Youngman
You know your girlfriend is too young when she'll do everything in bed but go upside down because it's too scary.
— Daniel Tosh
Being fed, and having a soft bed, and other people being in charge, seemed the most wonderful prospect in the world at that moment.
— J.K. Rowling
We used to sleep five to a bed and three of them used to wet the bed. I learnt to swim before I could walk.
— Bernard Manning
Well, you're a lucky man," Will said, as Nathan began to steer him out. "She certainly gives a good bed bath.
— Jojo Moyes
It is a very funny thing that the sleepier you are, the longer you take about getting to bed.
— C.S. Lewis
There's been a lot of coming home in the early mornings after funny nights out, having bizarre sandwiches in bed.
— Neneh Cherry
In bed, I can go for hours. Oh yes, I love naps.
— Dark Jar Tin Zoo
Once they call you a Latin Lover, you're in real trouble. Women expect an Oscar performance in bed.
— Marcello Mastroianni
Never lie in bed at night asking yourself questions you can't answer.
— Charles M. Schulz
Afore me! It is so very late,That we may call it early by and by. — William Shakespeare
Pie in a bed of raw onions. Human skull looking put-upon. Howl — Diana Wynne Jones
Wendy, Wendy, when you are sleeping in your silly bed you might be flying about with me saying funny things to the stars.
— J.M. Barrie
Nice guys finish last but that's what makes them good in bed.
— Nicholas M. Bugden
Go to bed, Cammie," my aunt ordered, sounding exactly like my mother. "No," I said, sounding exactly like my aunt. — Ally Carter
Let me be clear: I don't want to make love to a mannequin - I want to make love like a mannequin. Oh, if only I were that animated in bed.
— Dark Jar Tin Zoo
I had no idea what time it was, but I felt boneless and it would take an act of God to get me out of this bed. Or chocolate.
— Jennifer L. Armentrout
My mother was so house proud that when my father got up to sleepwalk she had the bed made by the time he got back.
— Chic Murray
The lot of the brideto be wed before bed
desired until rotten.
The lot of the author
to be read before bed
admired then forgotten. — Roman Payne
This man dresses like an unmade bed.
— Henny Youngman
You win, you dirty evil butt-munch. I'll never not let you stay over again. Now let's go back to bed.
— Ethan Day
Foley looks like an un-made bed.
— Jerry Lawler
If you don't believe you can win, there is no point in getting out of bed at the beginning of the day.
— H. L. Hunt
If you want breakfast in bed, you have to concider sleeping in the kitchen>
— Foster "Raul" Mkhabele
Lying in bed with Johnny Depp sussing out which males are what kind of pet from their clothes.
— Diane Messidoro
For the sake of your marriage, get a king-size bed. And if you really want to stay married, get two.
— Ray Romano
Shaga: How would you like to die, little man?Tyrion: In my bed, at the age of eighty with a belly full of wine and a woman's mouth around my cock. — George R R Martin
It's four A.M.! Who goes to bed this early!?
— Jeff Hirsch
When our bed is made, it's covered in 40 pillows-like we're stockpiling ammo for the global pillow fight.
— Jim Gaffigan
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
— Phyllis Diller
