My Life Funny Quotes
Collection of top 89 famous quotes about My Life Funny
My Life Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational My Life Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
I really wish your boyfriend would stay out of my love life.""Funny. I bet Felicity wishes her boyfriend would stay out of it, too. — Diana Peterfreund
My journey to the funny side of life
— Kelly Swanson
My book sales are way down today. Also, I've received two scathing reviews. One of them calls me a purveyor of insipid wet-dreams.
— Nenia Campbell
All my life I've wanted, just once, to say something clever without losing my train of thought
— Robert Breault
Hitler: Thank you, whoever you are. I think you just saved my life.The Doctor: Believe me ... It was an accident. — Steven Moffat
My goal in life is to be as happy as a studio audience.
— Jim Gaffigan
During the war an Italian girl saved my life. She hid me in her basement in Cleveland.
— Henny Youngman
I've been fighting to be who I am all my life. What's the point of being who I am, if I can't have the person who was worth all the fighting for?
— Stephanie Lennox
My advice to those who are about to begin, in earnest, the journey of life, is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other.
— Josh Billings
It's funny how this total stranger could relate to me better than anyone else I'd ever met. It was as if I'd known her my entire life.
— Fisher Amelie
When somebody is doing something really funny, in real life and as a performer, my instinct is to join them.
— Jake M. Johnson
I'm not funny. People assume that because my books are funny, I'll be funny in real life. It's the inevitable disappointment of meeting me.
— Jonathan Safran Foer
I've been funny my whole life. This is a gift God gave me.
— Tracy Morgan
I had a dream about you last night. The champagne was non-alcoholic. You didn't notice, and laughed at my jokes anyway.
— Michael Summers
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
— Will Rogers
My life's accomplishments? Sanity, and you.
— Elizabeth Gilbert
Sometimes I make my life a living hell by writing complex stories with complex characters. But I love it.
— Kevin James Breaux
My life acccomplishments? Sanity, and you
— Elizabeth Gilbert
Are you laughing? I can feel you laughing. My life isn't funny!" "Babe, your life should be a prime-time sitcom.
— Janet Evanovich
Satan impregnated my mother one lovely spring morning. We didn't have the heart to tell my father.
— Holly Hood
When I need some striking inspiration about deep depression for my new painting, I just need to go to check my bank account ...
— Hiroko Sakai
Reality Sucks, I want my dreams back.
— Sandra Chami Kassis
This is what my high school life had become - a horror show of epic, mind-fuck proportions.
— G.G. Silverman
I don't know what to say so I'll just say what's in my heart ... badoom, badoom, badoom.
— Mel Brooks
Always keep a smile. I attribute my long life to that. I believe I will die laughing. That's part of my program.
— Jeanne Calment
When I first met you, you were just an annoying novice nurse. But I found out that you saved my life and now you're my little sister. Isn't it funny.
— Kim Young-kwang
To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector. And just as I suspected, my machine was broken.
— Dark Jar Tin Zoo
Well sue me for staring. I'd be willing to scrub away my shame on his washboard abs.
— Tia Giacalone
It had to be hammered home quite a bit because I didn't see any humour in my life at all.
— Jimmy Carr
Are you trying to be subtle? Because I know you're talking about the honeybunnyless prom tragedy that is my life.
— John Green
I live in my own little world. But its ok, they know me here.
— Lauren Myracle
I didn't grow up with my dad, so it was always very funny to me, and always has been, what an important part DNA plays in one's life.
— Kiefer Sutherland
A girl can dream can't she? My new life plan is to stumble into every office of a CEO until I find a Christian Grey.
— Sophie Monroe
This isn't a Christmas special! This is my life. In the real world, miracles and goodness just don't happen.
— Richelle Mead
My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I write about wounds, the eternal treasons of life. It's not very funny, but it's sincere. My commitment is to sincerity.
— Tahar Ben Jelloun
Tomorrow, Trubshawe, I am going to get married again, thereby quite possibly making the greatest mistake of my life.
— David Niven
I think that i was a rat in rat wheel in my previous life ... can not forget the habit
— Hiroko Sakai
I happen to be very good with younger actors because I have extremely vivid memories of that time of my life, and kids are just funny.
— David M. Evans
That just sounds so funny, A-list. Really, I'm a mom, and that's how I'm going to be all my life.
— Angelina Jolie
Sailing is just the bottom line, like adding up the score in bridge. My real interest is in the tremendous game of life.
— Dennis Conner
Life and death played out before my very eyes. You don't see these things if you clean your room regularly. — Joan Bauer
I unwrapped my love for her like one might unwrap leftovers. Gotta eat up the old stuff first, as a cannibal might say in a retirement home.
— Dark Jar Tin Zoo
When I'm interviewed on Leno, just be funny, period. That's all they want from me. I don't want to tell my life story.
— David Spade
If I can sell tickets to my movies like Red Sonja or Last Action Hero, you know I can sell just about anything.
— Arnold Schwarzenegger
I want you to lie to me just as sweetly as you know how for the rest of my life.
— F Scott Fitzgerald
I don't have a type looks-wise, but all my exes have been funny, open-minded and ambitious. I can't stand men with no passion in life.
— Kathryn Prescott
I don't consider myself, you know, in real life one of those funny guys. My comedy comes through my work,
— Eugene Levy
Being a stand-up is my mission in life; it's my passion. My ongoing goal is to simply be funny, on my own, in front of a roomful of strangers.
— Jerry Seinfeld
The anecdote was funny, but as my father gazed across the river at the university of his youth, his Russian life was in his eyes.
— Paullina Simons
My condolences, you're still alive.
— Fakeer Ishavardas
I had a funny feeling that day, all day: something about how much I liked my life and where I was with it.
— John Darnielle
First of all, I find everything funny, which is upsetting to my children sometimes, and to people in my life, in general.
— Jenji Kohan
The inspiration for my Vines comes from thinking about funny and relatable experiences from my daily life.
— Lele Pons
Do you know something? I've got this funny feeling fate arranged for you to enter my life for the express purpose of tormenting me.
— Lindsay Armstrong
When I made coffee and Xeroxed and distributed newspapers at ABC News, I thought my life was over.
— Katie Couric
I realize nobody's coming to save me. I must save myself. I must be my own super hero. Although I am open to a sidekick.
— Karen Salmansohn
I've done so many sex scenes in my life and it's much easier to do a funny sex scene than a sex scene that is supposed to look like it feels.
— Stellan Skarsgard
My father chose my name , and my last name was chosen by my ancestors . That's enough, I myself choose my way
— Ali Shariati
For the first time in my life, I was in a shoot-out. A real, honest-to-goodness shoot-out with a bad guy. And, apparently, we both sucked.
— Darynda Jones
The funny thing is, Ivy, falling in love with you was as easy as breathing. The best time of my life.
— Kristen Callihan
Hey, if having a beautiful, smart, funny, talented man love me unconditionally for the rest of my life makes me a victim, then that's what I am.
— Victoria Denault
This stupid toaster is ruining my life!
— Cole Gibsen
So it was just funny to read a script that was just similar to what had been going on in my life.
— Piper Perabo
