Hate Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Hate Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I had pecs for about two days. Everyone would hate me. Just look at me walking around with my little peacoat on. My little customized pea coat. —
Robert Pattinson

I hate stand-up comics; I think funny is something you are, not something you desperately try to be in front of a roomful of obnoxious people. —
Peter Cameron

Nothing frustrates people more than a cocky guy who's still winning. —
Criss Jami

They said I was a valued customer, now they send me hate mail. —
Sophie Kinsella

I hate to say it but I hate black humor. I feel like a Klan member saying it, but it's just not funny. —
Issa Rae

At this point I'm sure he's more plastic than person, but most people who hate wrinkles become Daleks over time, anyway. —
Ashley Poston

I hate niggas! I hate em! I wish they'd let me join the Ku Klux Klan! —
Chris Rock

They really hate you, yes they do. They hate everyone, how 'bout you? —
Kami Garcia

I hate seeing people that look like you. Especially if God's living by the motto 'If at first you don't succeed.' —
Demetri Martin

I hate people who cry around me. I'm not friends with them anymore. Especially girls. Cuz girls are crying all the time. It's like, 'Shut up.' —
Robert Pattinson

Why does the world hate me? They both laughed, but it wasn't funny. SERIOUSLY. Why does the world hate me? —
Cora Carmack

Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, "Are we going to have sex again?" He said, "Yes, but not with each other." —
Rita Rudner

I don't smoke a lot of pot anymore. No one wants to hang around a guy who ends every sentence with, "Do you guys hate me?" —
Mike Birbiglia

Hate is funny. Love isn't. Love can kill you. Hate can keep you alive. —
Carol Grace

Don't you just hate a phony-looking stiff? - Aunt Edna —
Janet Evanovich

Even hating myself I still think I'm better than you. —
Stephen Schneider

There's not enough psychedelic stuff on TV. I want the world to be a bit weirder than it is. I hate reality, so I hate reality TV. But I love Columbo. —
Noel Fielding

It's a funny thing, hope. It's not like love, or fear, or hate. It's a feeling you don't really know you had until it's gone. —
Anna Quindlen

I decided I would rather have a day job and love music than to play music that made me hate it. —
David Torn

I hate arrows. They try to tell me which direction to go. It's like "I ain't going that way, line with two thirds of a triangle on the end!" —
Mitch Hedberg

I hate when I break my own rules. What's the point of me being rational if I flail around like a clown? —
Jesse Ball

The idea that you can't be attractive and funny at the same time is something that I hate. —
Emma Stone

I hate trying to analyze comedy in some deep way. If it gets laughs, it's funny. —
Rachel Dratch

That's what I hate about a lot of comedies, when you're hitting a line or making it funny. —
Jennifer Aniston

Don't you just hate it, when you are in bed with three beautiful women, and the least attractive one whispers: save it for me! —
Jim Carrey

It's a funny place, this world. Hate has rights. Love has none. —
Torey L. Hayden

I hate when someone keep on asking me to guess even after I failed to crack twice! —
Nelson Jack

It is funny how the things we hate are the things we miss most when they are gone —
Erin Bowman

I hate it in friends when they come too late to help. —
Euripides

I hate witches. Humans had the right idea, burning them at the stake. —
Charlaine Harris

Better a loving single-parent family than a 'conventional' family where the parents hate each other and the father is a demagogue. —
Moby

Life sometimes confuses us by making us discover in someone we hate a quality or qualities we love. —
Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now." —
Rodney Dangerfield

I hate sitting in traffic, because I always get run over. —
Milton Jones

These walls are funny. First you hate 'em, then you get used to 'em. Enough time passes, you get so you depend on them. That's institutionalized. —
Morgan Freeman

Have you ever noticed how good things go to those who hate? —
Sol Luckman

I hate flossing, I wish I just had one long curvy tooth. They didn't have to make separations for me. —
Mitch Hedberg

For the record, I hate skiing ... and if you get killed doing it, GOOD. —
Jim Norton

I hate you' she said to me one afternoon. 'I really, really hate you.' Call me sensitive, but I couldn't help but take it personally. —
David Sedaris

All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwartzkopf. —
John Wayne

I don't hate you.. I just don't like that you exist —
Gena Showalter