Funny Street Quotes

The Occupy Wall Street movement faltered when activists realized that traders were quite busy already. — The Covert Comic

I got arrested for playing chess in the street. I said, it's because I'm black, isn't it. — Milton Jones

But Wall Street people are in fact very smart; they're funny, they're not company men who work their way up the chain. — Paul Krugman

The way you might fear a cow sitting down in the middle of the street during rush hour, that's how I fear Canadians. — Maria Semple

Stoplights and love can be cruel — Sesame Street

What's funny in 'The Mayor of MacDougal Street' is how Dave Van Ronk talks a lot about the time and how exciting it was and how electric it was. — Oscar Isaac

I live at the end of a dead end one way street. I don't know how I got there. — Steven Wright

I have the street smarts and survival skills of, like, a poodle. — Jennifer Lawrence

There have been man-on-the-street interviews for years, but insulting people is not that funny to me. — Billy Eichner

Ish #303 It's a street food vendor! Stop asking for the health score rating. — Regina Griffin

A couple weeks ago I was on the street and I saw an ugly pregnant lady, and I just thought, 'Good for you.' — Demetri Martin

Cowboy!" she hollered.
Every man on the street turned to stare at her."
pg.117 — Lori Wilde

People were stopping me on the street to say, 'Oh my God, it's Crazy Eyes!' Which is kind of a funny thing to have people shout at you on the street. — Uzo Aduba

A good programmer is someone who always looks both ways before crossing a one-way street. — Doug Linder

I glared at him. "You came all the way to Essex just to spy on us?"
"Yeah." He smirked. "I crossed the street. It was really rough. — Leila Sales

"What's the latest dope on Wall Street?" "My son!" — Henny Youngman

Some people are street-smart, some people are book-smart, but most people are just dumber than dirt. — Lois Greiman

No one wants to read a story where I saw a cute puppy on the street and I petted it. I mean, that's not funny. I only write about the funny stuff. — Tucker Max

Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are? Wall Street is now being called Wall Mart Street — Jay Leno

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. — Steven Wright