Christopher Moore Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Christopher Moore
Christopher Moore Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Christopher Moore quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There's no such place.
— Christopher Moore
It was as if vampirism carried with it a crampless case of rattlesnake PMS.
— Christopher Moore
Whistler,' Manet called. 'How's your mother?
— Christopher Moore
Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him ...
— Christopher Moore
Cofishes-other fish in a group, coworkers, cohorts, etc. Shut up, it's a word.
— Christopher Moore
All fear comes from trying to see the future, Biff. If you know what is coming, you aren't afraid.
— Christopher Moore
A question asked in earnest deserves an earnest answer.
— Christopher Moore
I like a girl with a substantial bottom,' said Renoir, drawing in the air the size bottom he preferred.
— Christopher Moore
If it be not destiny, then surely there is plausible deniability, which in the parlance of politics is the same thing.
— Christopher Moore
When your best friend is the son of God, you get tired of losing every argument.
— Christopher Moore
I'm poor and my cat is huge.
— Christopher Moore
One time you take a hundred thousand dollars and let a vampire go, the whole world turns on you like you're some kind of bad guy.
— Christopher Moore
Charlie Asher: Mrs. Ling, is that duck wearing trousers?Mrs. Ling: Could be ... You hear of paper-wrap chicken? This duck in pants. — Christopher Moore
Okey dokey, fire up the blender, let's make a furry-flurry smoothie out of that squirrel!
— Christopher Moore
I like my tea like I like my men," Audrey said. Jane looked at her quizzically. "Weak and green," Charlie said.
— Christopher Moore
About to be hanged is my status quo, not a condition that requires your repair.
— Christopher Moore
If you are going to learn, you need to forget what you know. - Pokey
— Christopher Moore
It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.
— Christopher Moore
There was a flash, a ding, and everything got dark and gooey.
— Christopher Moore
Pain travels pretty well.
— Christopher Moore
Will there be heinous fuckery, Pocket?
— Christopher Moore
I've made a dog's breakfast of English history, geography, 'King Lear,' and the English language in general.
— Christopher Moore
Marry for love, stay married, and raise happy children who are quick to laugh and slow to judge.
— Christopher Moore
Any freedom that can be given can be taken away.
— Christopher Moore
True, I am drunk, and small, and damp, but mistake not my moistness for weakness, although there's an argument to be made for that, as well.
— Christopher Moore
People, generally, suck.
— Christopher Moore
I wouldn't go to yoga with you because I'm not bendy, not because I'm not spiritual.
— Christopher Moore
Most of us don't live our lives with one, integrated self that meets the world, we're a whole bunch of selves.
— Christopher Moore
She's studying the Existentialists this month. Asked for a study day last week to kill an Arab on the beach.
— Christopher Moore
Don't bruise the Foo!
— Christopher Moore
At "tooth fairy," Sophie popped her head out the door. "I will smack that bitch up and take her bag of quarters! I will not be fucked with!
— Christopher Moore
CHORUS: And so, while the fool slept the sleep of the dead, the beautiful Jewess snipped off the tip of his willy.
— Christopher Moore
He invented Kung Fu when translated to English means method by which short, bald guys can kick the bejeezus out of you.
— Christopher Moore
Evolution doesn't really have a destination. It's just dicking around with possibilities.
— Christopher Moore
Funny how the illusion of safety can make us careless.
— Christopher Moore
Blessed are the minimarshmallows," the angel said, swooning a little.
— Christopher Moore
An artist can't let madness stop him from making art, he simply has to channel it.
— Christopher Moore
I don't give a toss about being remembered after my death.
— Christopher Moore
How much humanity has been spoiled for the confusion of movement with progress, my friend?
— Christopher Moore
He smiled to himself. Through many centuries and many incarnations, he had learned one universal truth: bitches love them some cushions.
— Christopher Moore
Die, thou badger-shagging spunk monkey," said I.
— Christopher Moore
We will bring your guilt as well. You wouldn't have escaped it anyway. It is a parent's gift.
— Christopher Moore
Children see magic because they look for it.
— Christopher Moore
The landings below the bridge were perfect alcoves for conspiracy.
— Christopher Moore
An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture.
— Christopher Moore
Why is it one can busta rhyme or busta move anywhere, but one must busta cap in someone's ass?
— Christopher Moore
Torah! Torah! Torah!"- THE WAR CRY OF THE KAMIKAZE RABBIS. — Christopher Moore
Night crawled across the desert sky like a black cat with phosphorus dandruff.
— Christopher Moore
Your puny worm god weapons are useless against my superior Christmas Kung Fu.
— Christopher Moore
He had broken one of the cardinal rules - Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself - and he'd been loving life ever since. They
— Christopher Moore
He was a LEPER, you idiot! Not a leopard.
— Christopher Moore
I fink I gots deaf on me willie.
— Christopher Moore
One day the good times had to keep on rolling, and all of life's horseshit would turn to circuses.
— Christopher Moore
We'll help," said one boy, his finger far enough up his nose to tickle a memory nesting in his frontal lobe.
— Christopher Moore
I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry.
— Christopher Moore
Which is why you chose to wear that delightful ensemble from the skank-wear collection at Hoes-n-Thangs? -Tommy
— Christopher Moore
It was sometimes difficult to reconcile a man's talents with his personality.
— Christopher Moore
So safe," Coyote said, "that you can lose it in a day? To be safe is to be afraid. Is that what you want: to be afraid?
— Christopher Moore
Justice favors the favored sons.
— Christopher Moore
I love British cursing - the cadence of it, the joy in the sound of the words, and the vulgarity of it.
— Christopher Moore
Medication and forgiveness can make for joyous moments with the dying - it
— Christopher Moore
He shuffled along with the hang-dog look of the cosmically fucked.
— Christopher Moore
You don't hurry a thinker, and you don't talk to him when he's thinking. It's just inconsiderate.
— Christopher Moore
Not unlike the toaster, I control darkness.
— Christopher Moore
I have followed my penis into helland returned with the story. — Christopher Moore
No one knows why, but second only to eating the brains of the living, the dead love affordable prefab furniture.
— Christopher Moore
Nothing fucks up a religion like an intervention from a real God.
— Christopher Moore
You love your wars for the coffers, but for the warrior and the widow, the orphan and the owned, you've not two dry fucks to give.
— Christopher Moore
...Heinous Fuckery, most foul!
— Christopher Moore
As Richard Pryor was to Eddie Murphy, that's what Kurt Vonnegut was to me.
— Christopher Moore
Life is messy. Would that every puzzle piece fell into place, every word was kind, every accident happy, but such is not the case. Life is messy
— Christopher Moore
People are douche bags. Many people. Not all. But you know, most.Which is why we destroyed the world. — Christopher Moore
He had a plan - and a bus pass with four more days left on it - so this son of a bitch had picked the wrong guy to fuck with.
— Christopher Moore
Is it so hard for you to give up what you never had?
— Christopher Moore
You can't just accidentally penis somebody.
— Christopher Moore
He didn't understand religion. It was like heroin or golf: He knew a lot of people did it, but he didn't understand why.
— Christopher Moore
Sophie marched away in rhythm to her new chant, not in the butt - not in the butt - not in the butt.
— Christopher Moore
And he was like "The sedative in the blood, blah, blah, four hours, blah, blah, nerdspeak, geektalk -" -Abby
— Christopher Moore
How would I feel, he thought, If I woke up and she was making love to me? Why I believe that I would be pleasantly surprised.
— Christopher Moore
The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear.
— Christopher Moore
That was supposed to be the whole purpose of the Internet, you know. To share scientific information.""Not a Viagra- and porn-delivery system? — Christopher Moore
Life is an irritation.
— Christopher Moore
Mr. Asher, you can resist who you are for only so long. Finally, you just decide to go with fate.
— Christopher Moore
Mr. Asher, I'm going to have to ask you to leave." "No, ma'am, I'm going to have to insist that you pass away, this instant. You're overdue.
— Christopher Moore
Maybe life is just easier if you're a little goofy ...
— Christopher Moore
You can't just go around blurting out the truth like a prophet with Tourette's syndrome.
— Christopher Moore
He was continually surprised at the speed and accuracy of her creepiness. She was like some creepiness child prodigy
— Christopher Moore
Joseph had regained his composure by now. Evidently, once you accept that your wife slept with God, extraordinary events seem sort of commonplace.
— Christopher Moore
The two had been together since they were little girls, and so loved and hated each other like sisters.
— Christopher Moore
You should never pass up an opportunity to be kind. You should never not thank someone. You should never not say something nice when you think it.
— Christopher Moore
The Angel Gabriel disappeared once for sixty years and they found him on earth hiding in the body of a man named Miles Davis.
— Christopher Moore
There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon.
— Christopher Moore
A little girl's voice said, "I am become Death, destroyer of worlds!" Audrey held the phone out for Charlie. "It's for you.
— Christopher Moore
In business, as in politics, the public is ever so tolerant of those who slime.
— Christopher Moore
She hugged me and I could feel the heat rise in my face, either from shame or love, like there was a difference.
— Christopher Moore
He was a writer and words were his weapons.
— Christopher Moore
I was seven before I realized that you could eat breakfast with your pants on.
— Christopher Moore
What do you bring to this enterprise to justify a third of the profits?" "Will," said Iago.
— Christopher Moore
There's always a bloody ghost.
— Christopher Moore
