Norm MacDonald Quotes

Top 100 wise famous quotes and sayings by Norm MacDonald

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Norm MacDonald Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Norm MacDonald on Wise Famous Quotes.

Norm MacDonald quotes: Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong. Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I would love to stay at SNL forever. But you can't stay in the same place. People think you're a loser. I would love to stay at SNL forever. But you can't stay in the same place. People think you're a loser.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Proper respect to others is the most prudent rule of directing the measure of reverence due to ourselves. Proper respect to others is the most prudent rule of directing the measure of reverence due to ourselves.
Norm MacDonald quotes: There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed. There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The promises we break are usually such as we are most forward in making. The promises we break are usually such as we are most forward in making.
Norm MacDonald quotes: There's no such thing, of course, as an old-fashioned gay guy. They're the most decadent people. There's no such thing, of course, as an old-fashioned gay guy. They're the most decadent people.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I'm not gay, so I don't know much about Broadway musicals. I'm not gay, so I don't know much about Broadway musicals.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost. Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.
Norm MacDonald quotes: None seem to bear the imputation of supposed guilt with greater intolerance than such as are, on other occasions, obviously culpable of vice or crime. None seem to bear the imputation of supposed guilt with greater intolerance than such as are, on other occasions, obviously culpable of vice or crime.
Norm MacDonald quotes: When I was a kid, everybody that played golf was an old man. Until Tiger showed up, they weren't in very good shape. When I was a kid, everybody that played golf was an old man. Until Tiger showed up, they weren't in very good shape.
Norm MacDonald quotes: We advise others better than ourselves. We advise others better than ourselves.
Norm MacDonald quotes: If you desire praise or esteem, endeavor to merit it. If you desire praise or esteem, endeavor to merit it.
Norm MacDonald quotes: You can't love your team without hating another team. You can't love your team without hating another team.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain. Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I don't know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it's fun to watch either one of them get beat up. I don't know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it's fun to watch either one of them get beat up.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I never had any interest in sitcoms or motion pictures or anything like that. I never had any interest in sitcoms or motion pictures or anything like that.
Norm MacDonald quotes: In love, we are best pleased when we please others. In love, we are best pleased when we please others.
Norm MacDonald quotes: If you're looking for the suspect in a suicide bombing, here's a clue: Look for the dead guy. If you're looking for the suspect in a suicide bombing, here's a clue: Look for the dead guy.
Norm MacDonald quotes: You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don't care for him. You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don't care for him.
Norm MacDonald quotes: You ever see 'The Dating Game'? That's a weird game show. The prize on that show: another contestant. Talk about cheap. You ever see 'The Dating Game'? That's a weird game show. The prize on that show: another contestant. Talk about cheap.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle. The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Whenever I do theaters, I don't like 'em. I don't think they're right for stand-up. Whenever I do theaters, I don't like 'em. I don't think they're right for stand-up.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do. The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I have always loved Las Vegas. It's a traditional place for lounge comics to perform, and I love that. I have always loved Las Vegas. It's a traditional place for lounge comics to perform, and I love that.
Norm MacDonald quotes: If you're watching a comedian on television and he's making a political point, I would say he's gotten too serious. If you're watching a comedian on television and he's making a political point, I would say he's gotten too serious.
Norm MacDonald quotes: A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others. A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others.
Norm MacDonald quotes: We would seldom be deceived by flattery, did our own conceit not promote the delusion. We would seldom be deceived by flattery, did our own conceit not promote the delusion.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading. The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I just like doing standup, that's all I'm interested in or good at. I just like doing standup, that's all I'm interested in or good at.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical. I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Most men will go farther to give advice than to follow their own opinion. Most men will go farther to give advice than to follow their own opinion.
Norm MacDonald quotes: If you cannot patiently bear correction, endeavor to avoid fault. If you cannot patiently bear correction, endeavor to avoid fault.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Our passions may be compared to certain slavesthe more severity we show them, the better they obey us. Our passions may be compared to certain slaves
the more severity we show them, the better they obey us.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The vanity of being asked advice often makes us confirm the opinion of those that consult us. The vanity of being asked advice often makes us confirm the opinion of those that consult us.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame. Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form. Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
Norm MacDonald quotes: They're like 'You're an alcoholic.' I go 'No, I'm not.' and then-apparently that's what alcoholics say too, you know? They're like 'You're an alcoholic.' I go 'No, I'm not.' and then-apparently that's what alcoholics say too, you know?
Norm MacDonald quotes: A capacity for hating the object of desire is, perhaps, the best cure for love in cases of disappointment. A capacity for hating the object of desire is, perhaps, the best cure for love in cases of disappointment.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices. Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Jealousy seldom punishes with the severity it suffers. Jealousy seldom punishes with the severity it suffers.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny. Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.
Norm MacDonald quotes: In giving advice, aptitude is often less to be considered, than seasonableness. In giving advice, aptitude is often less to be considered, than seasonableness.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I don't care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win. I don't care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them. Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
Norm MacDonald quotes: In love, first please the eye, then win the heart. In love, first please the eye, then win the heart.
Norm MacDonald quotes: A suspicious person is the rival of him that deceives, both seem to practice a knowledge of cunning device, and equable sense of disengenuous merit. A suspicious person is the rival of him that deceives, both seem to practice a knowledge of cunning device, and equable sense of disengenuous merit.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Enjoyment inflames love in some men, and extinguishes it in others: the wind that assists large vessels, upsets small ones. Enjoyment inflames love in some men, and extinguishes it in others: the wind that assists large vessels, upsets small ones.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it's the only disease where you can win a bunch of money. Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it's the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Were there no fools, there would be no flatterers. Were there no fools, there would be no flatterers.
Norm MacDonald quotes: There is a very prevalent tenet with youth, that good company is every thing desirable, and that bad is even better than none. There is a very prevalent tenet with youth, that good company is every thing desirable, and that bad is even better than none.
Norm MacDonald quotes: We are often less grieved at disappointments than at ourselves for having said much concerning the certainty of our expectations. We are often less grieved at disappointments than at ourselves for having said much concerning the certainty of our expectations.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied. Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I like doing a funny show where I don't have to act and fall in love with a girl. I like doing a funny show where I don't have to act and fall in love with a girl.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I'm a huge sports fan but have no interest in minutiae. I don't remember who won Super Bowls five years ago or listen to sports talk radio. I'm a huge sports fan but have no interest in minutiae. I don't remember who won Super Bowls five years ago or listen to sports talk radio.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence. Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I don't know anything about politics. I wouldn't put too much into my prediction on politics. I don't know anything about politics. I wouldn't put too much into my prediction on politics.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Never raise expectations in others that you cannot realize: promise is less pleasing than disappointment is vexatious. Never raise expectations in others that you cannot realize: promise is less pleasing than disappointment is vexatious.
Norm MacDonald quotes: This would have been a great game to watch if we didn't have any money on it. This would have been a great game to watch if we didn't have any money on it.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit. Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
Norm MacDonald quotes: It is easier to hate those we love, than love those whom we have hated. It is easier to hate those we love, than love those whom we have hated.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Laws, however divine in origin and institution, would be found of little coercion among men, were the administration of them not committed to mortals. Laws, however divine in origin and institution, would be found of little coercion among men, were the administration of them not committed to mortals.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I'm thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies. I'm thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite. Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
Norm MacDonald quotes: My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don't know. Probably died. My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don't know. Probably died.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Love is an artful arrangement of artless pretensions, whereby we labor to appear innocent in what we desire to be most cunning. Love is an artful arrangement of artless pretensions, whereby we labor to appear innocent in what we desire to be most cunning.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Kenny G has a Christmas album out this year. Hey, happy birthday Jesus! Hope you like crap! Kenny G has a Christmas album out this year. Hey, happy birthday Jesus! Hope you like crap!
Norm MacDonald quotes: It is better to be idle than employed in ill. It is better to be idle than employed in ill.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I love writing - it's the best. But I really hate collaboration. I love writing - it's the best. But I really hate collaboration.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I never do impressions, but I probably should. People like that stuff. I never do impressions, but I probably should. People like that stuff.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love. Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Few people love with the violence they hate. Few people love with the violence they hate.
Norm MacDonald quotes: They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it. They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The man that does not fear punishment, little regards crime. The man that does not fear punishment, little regards crime.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Stand-up has the best writers, because it's the hardest writing by a million miles. Stand-up has the best writers, because it's the hardest writing by a million miles.
Norm MacDonald quotes: I think clever people think that poor people are stupid. I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction. Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Pulp Fiction is a, uh, gritty, urban satire. Pump Friction is a uh-uh, a bunch of uh, dudes and ladies having dirty sex. Pulp Fiction is a, uh, gritty, urban satire. Pump Friction is a uh-uh, a bunch of uh, dudes and ladies having dirty sex.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men. The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The character of giving advice often makes us accountable for the conduct of those we advise. The character of giving advice often makes us accountable for the conduct of those we advise.
Norm MacDonald quotes: All my life's about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn't cost very much money. All my life's about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn't cost very much money.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity. Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Education makes some men wiser, others more ridiculous and foolish! Education makes some men wiser, others more ridiculous and foolish!
Norm MacDonald quotes: Your worst and most dangerous enemy is the person that injures you under the pretensions of friendship. Your worst and most dangerous enemy is the person that injures you under the pretensions of friendship.
Norm MacDonald quotes: During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them. During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Few criminals die sensible of their crimes. Few criminals die sensible of their crimes.
Norm MacDonald quotes: It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated. It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.
Norm MacDonald quotes: He that searches for praise will often find contempt. He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
Norm MacDonald quotes: In terms of merit, sports has mathematical statistics. That's how you know who the best player is. In terms of merit, sports has mathematical statistics. That's how you know who the best player is.
Norm MacDonald quotes: A man's enemies are those he should endeavor first to make his friends. A man's enemies are those he should endeavor first to make his friends.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue. Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Death is a funny thing. Not funny haha, like a Woody Allen movie, but funny strange, like a Woody Allen marriage. Death is a funny thing. Not funny haha, like a Woody Allen movie, but funny strange, like a Woody Allen marriage.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly. The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.
Norm MacDonald quotes: We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation. We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
Norm MacDonald quotes: It got very tedious saying the same jokes in the same way with the same attitude. It got very tedious saying the same jokes in the same way with the same attitude.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Note to self ... Sex with blow-up doll is not as good as advertised. Note to self ... Sex with blow-up doll is not as good as advertised.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them. The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them.
Norm MacDonald quotes: All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise. All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
Norm MacDonald quotes: The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity. The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity.
Norm MacDonald quotes: Most men appear wiser in their doubts than in their belief. Most men appear wiser in their doubts than in their belief.
Norm MacDonald quotes: RIP Amy Winehouse. We lost a true heroin addict today. RIP Amy Winehouse. We lost a true heroin addict today.

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