MaryJanice Davidson Quotes

I'm in a Roadrunner cartoon, Sinclair. And I'm the coyote.

Touch my things again, whether I'm dead or not, and I'll kick your ass up into your shoulder blades.

She couldn't tell where his pupils ended and the irises began; looking into those eyes was like looking into a well where children had drowned.

Also,I loathe it when you refer to me as dude Eric Sinclair to Betsy

Just because I'm dead doesn't mean I can't have a life.

Hell couldn't be worse than a WalMart after midnight, right?

Being a writer is great, and being a parent is great, and I hate Marching Band.

They weren't moving. Perhaps I was dazzling then with my ineptitude. It had happened before.

There's more than one way for a girl to Google a cat.

To paraphrase Stephen King, sometimes an accident can be an unhappy woman's best friend. Put

I'm the wife of a king, and the mother of kings. And I'm not asking you, I'm telling you. So fuck off, Jack.- Queen Christina (The Royal Treatment)

Why is it suddenly uncool to spell? That's all I want to know.

Eric came to Macy's? Did he burst into flames the moment he passed the first cash register?

This is a great time to shut up and kiss me.
To her delight, Blake obliged.

Can you burn me up with holy water? Poke me to death with your crucifix? Pelt me with communion wafers?

Elizabeth Anne Taylor April 25, 1974 - April 25, 2004 Our Sweetheart, Only resting

Wow, girlfriend, you're incompatible with life!
And here I thought I was just incompatible with pink.

The mouth of a passionate lover ... or a woman who would bite when she was angry.

I own two beautiful homes, and I'm always half-expecting the cops to pull in, seize me with firm compassion, and escort me out.

Never, EVER give up. Not ever. Not EVER. Ever EVER!

Back off, boys. You don't want to mess with an out-of-work secretary. We're real testy.

I stared harder. Come on, vampire mojo. Do your thing. "Don't. Kill. Yourself."
"Why. Are you. Talking. Like this?

You have attained maturity; display it for us, if you please.

We have souls. Sure we do. Otherwise we'd do bad things all the time. You know, like
politicians.

It's a long story. Prepared to be regaled.

I'm really fortunate that I type 120 words a minute.

I love interviews, meeting fans, teaching workshops, giving speeches ... all of it.

I'm so dull, the fucking cat runs away about three times a month just to get a little excitement. And

I love traveling, but I love the bum I married, and the bums I gave birth to, more. And the dogs. I love them, too.

I could have gone to medical school, I said. Except for all the math and stuff.

God is dead! Only the IT department can help you now.
-Edward Smegger in Super, Girl! (p. 79)

AT&T works in Hell. I can't think about it very long or I'll get really, really scared of AT&T.

I can't not write funny. It's literally the only way I know how to do it.

What it comes down to is this, Betsy: you do what you need to, and then you haul ass out of there. Every single time.

I'm a sucker for the big, gruff, distant, emotionally closed-off hero who sloooowly warms up to the feisty, awesome, sweet heroine.

You just never knew when a totally normal vampire errand would end in a bloodbath with severed-limb soap.

I looked up. Mom looked down at me with the compassion/practicality combo that was her trademark.

If you don't sin, Jesus died for nothing

Leave it to a vampire to think a healthy guy in his late thirties or early forties was on his deathbed.

It was scary how much she sounded like me sometimes. Maybe that's why she totally got on my nerves

You'll pay," she said stonily. "You won't be like this by this time tomorrow."
"Bored and pissed off? God, I hope not.

Somehow, when I wasn't looking, somehow because it's electronic mail, none of the basic grammar rules applied.

Magic: The Gathering is like Dungeons and Dragons if D&D was played with cards and didn't take 18 weeks.

A grumpy vampire is a homicidal vampire. Hungry ones were even worse.

Interesting shade #23 Lush Golden Blonde highlights. Heyyyyyy ... The woman in the awful suit was me! The woman in the cheap shoes was me!

Take your hands off her, Sinclair told the guy behind me, Or they'll write books about what I'll do to you.

It's inappropriate for the queen of the dead to be afraid of
ghosts.

I turned. Tall, Dark, and Sinister was rapidly approaching.

I mean, I wouldn't have wanted to be recognized. But I was kind of a prude about cheating on taxes, group sex, murder, and stuff.

He said my name the way diabetics talked about hot fudge sundaes.

Yeah, well, it's been a super fun week. And by 'super fun' I mean 'horrible and endless'.

Friends are such a mixed blessing.

I suppose I should say something negative about vampires living in sin," Father Markus said, "but that seems to be the least of your problems.

Has anyone ever told you that you lack focus?

He turned to her and pressed a kiss to the corner of her mouth. When he spoke his deep voice vibrated all through her. 'I. Remember. Everything.

I wrote for free for, like, fifteen years; I could redo my parlor in rejection slips. It would be surprisingly tasteful - they use nice paper.

What's amazing is that she was possessed by Satan for almost a year and nobody noticed anything unusual!

I might occasionally forget how to open a car door and have too many shower curtains, but I've got some standards.

I like the idea of federal employees licensed to carry weapons who are also heavily medicated; it just works for me on all sorts of levels.

Never let your fiend off his leash unless there's lots of room to run (and no people around).

So you're a vampire?"
"Yes. But don't be scared. I'm still a nice person.

What can I say? Death is messy. And she had it coming.

My 20s were a blizzard of rejection slips.

I mean, not that I killed her just to get the car, or anything.

I swore we'd never be together, but - '
'Your inner whore would not be denied.' she finished.

I'm rubber and you're glue," I told Satan, " and everything that bounces of me sticks to you.

A day without the Antichrist sitting in judgment on you is a day without sunshine.

I trudged around on the muddy river bottom for half an hour, patiently waiting to drown, before giving up and slogging my way back to shore.

I'd go to a bookstore, and I'd flip through flap copy, and I'd think, 'If this gal can get published, I can get published.'

I know it's practical for career women, but sneakers with suits? Jesus couldn't possibly weep harder than I did.

Mom, he was fucking my mother. He's a motherfucker!
- Sleeping with the Fishes

I fucking hate tomato juice! It's like drinking red snot.

The man had a dick on him that wouldn't quit.

A vampire? How ith that pothible? I died in a car ackthident, for God'th thake! Aw, thon of a bith!

I'm not playing vamp politics.

A gold cage is still a cage.
-King David I
Oh, go cry in a bag of money.
-Queen Christina