Christopher Moore Quotes

Top 100 wise famous quotes and sayings by Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Christopher Moore on Wise Famous Quotes.

Christopher Moore quotes: Whistler,' Manet called. 'How's your mother? Whistler,' Manet called. 'How's your mother?
Christopher Moore quotes: Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him ... Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him ...
Christopher Moore quotes: Faith isn't an act of intelligence, it's an act of imagination. Faith isn't an act of intelligence, it's an act of imagination.
Christopher Moore quotes: A question asked in earnest deserves an earnest answer. A question asked in earnest deserves an earnest answer.
Christopher Moore quotes: Science, you don't know, looks like magic. Science, you don't know, looks like magic.
Christopher Moore quotes: Rivera rubbed his temples. "Satan told you to do it?" he said wearily."No.""Elvis?""I told you, it's supernatural. Rivera rubbed his temples. "Satan told you to do it?" he said wearily.
"No."
"Elvis?"
"I told you, it's supernatural.
Christopher Moore quotes: Tastes like shit! Tastes like shit!
Christopher Moore quotes: I'm poor and my cat is huge. I'm poor and my cat is huge.
Christopher Moore quotes: One time you take a hundred thousand dollars and let a vampire go, the whole world turns on you like you're some kind of bad guy. One time you take a hundred thousand dollars and let a vampire go, the whole world turns on you like you're some kind of bad guy.
Christopher Moore quotes: Actually, orcas aren't quite as complex as scientists imagine. Most killer whales are just four tons of doofus dressed up like a police car. Actually, orcas aren't quite as complex as scientists imagine. Most killer whales are just four tons of doofus dressed up like a police car.
Christopher Moore quotes: Moses should have said Let my people go. Please. Moses should have said Let my people go. Please.
Christopher Moore quotes: If manta rays are going to be harmless, they should look more harmless, Pardee thought. Fuckers look like aquatic Draculas. If manta rays are going to be harmless, they should look more harmless, Pardee thought. Fuckers look like aquatic Draculas.
Christopher Moore quotes: Routine feeds the illusion of safety... Routine feeds the illusion of safety...
Christopher Moore quotes: What is character, if not a man's measure of himself against his friends and enemies? What is character, if not a man's measure of himself against his friends and enemies?
Christopher Moore quotes: Funny how easy heartbreak can come. I've always had a talent for it. Funny how easy heartbreak can come. I've always had a talent for it.
Christopher Moore quotes: I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores. I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.
Christopher Moore quotes: The only difference between a pirate and a privateer is a flag, The only difference between a pirate and a privateer is a flag,
Christopher Moore quotes: not the end of the world, just darkness over everything," Charlie cheerfully said. "it gets dark - turn on a light. not the end of the world, just darkness over everything," Charlie cheerfully said. "it gets dark - turn on a light.
Christopher Moore quotes: Oh yes, I kept all of the abominations at bay while Kaliel played with his favorite sheep behind the bushes. Oh yes, I kept all of the abominations at bay while Kaliel played with his favorite sheep behind the bushes.
Christopher Moore quotes: A theory has no better time than when it's lying there naked, pure, unsullied by facts. A theory has no better time than when it's lying there naked, pure, unsullied by facts.
Christopher Moore quotes: She's so obnoxious. Like a whole Saturday night drunk tank full of obnoxious packed into one little body. Detective Cavuto She's so obnoxious. Like a whole Saturday night drunk tank full of obnoxious packed into one little body. Detective Cavuto
Christopher Moore quotes: You think too much. Thinking will bring you nothing but suffering. Be simple. You think too much. Thinking will bring you nothing but suffering. Be simple.
Christopher Moore quotes: The Beta Male is seldom the strongest or the fastest, but because he can anticipate danger, he far outnumbers his Alpha Male competition. The The Beta Male is seldom the strongest or the fastest, but because he can anticipate danger, he far outnumbers his Alpha Male competition. The
Christopher Moore quotes: What's a Mennonite?" Vance asked. "Amish with blenders. What's a Mennonite?" Vance asked. "Amish with blenders.
Christopher Moore quotes: Hope is merely another face of desire. And desire is a motherfucker. Hope is merely another face of desire. And desire is a motherfucker.
Christopher Moore quotes: It was a machine-gun orgasm, dark chocolate, spring water in the desert, a hallelujah chorus and the cavelry coming to the rescue all at once. It was a machine-gun orgasm, dark chocolate, spring water in the desert, a hallelujah chorus and the cavelry coming to the rescue all at once.
Christopher Moore quotes: Let's bat that nun out of the dog park! Let's bat that nun out of the dog park!
Christopher Moore quotes: Snake eyes!" the croupier said. "Lizard dick!" Coyote shouted back.This sent me to convulsions. Snake eyes!" the croupier said. "Lizard dick!" Coyote shouted back.
This sent me to convulsions.
Christopher Moore quotes: That's a horrible plan." "Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that. That's a horrible plan." "Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that.
Christopher Moore quotes: You motherfucking kitties need to step the fuck off! You motherfucking kitties need to step the fuck off!
Christopher Moore quotes: I don't give a toss about being remembered after my death. I don't give a toss about being remembered after my death.
Christopher Moore quotes: Losers can only flourish until a dominant species appears Losers can only flourish until a dominant species appears
Christopher Moore quotes: Take a moment to catch your breath and revel in your rhetorical mastery and achievement. Take a moment to catch your breath and revel in your rhetorical mastery and achievement.
Christopher Moore quotes: (For what is curiosity if not intellectual temptation? And what progress is there without curiosity?) (For what is curiosity if not intellectual temptation? And what progress is there without curiosity?)
Christopher Moore quotes: People are horrible and they lie. People are horrible and they lie.
Christopher Moore quotes: Charlie Asher: I accidently shagged a monk last night.Minty Fresh: Sometimes, in times of crisis, that shit cannot be avoided. Charlie Asher: I accidently shagged a monk last night.
Minty Fresh: Sometimes, in times of crisis, that shit cannot be avoided.
Christopher Moore quotes: He tapped into the Zen of ignorance, the enlightenment of absurdity. He tapped into the Zen of ignorance, the enlightenment of absurdity.
Christopher Moore quotes: but all things considered, he could go a very long time not being run over by a Volvo again and feel just dandy about it. He but all things considered, he could go a very long time not being run over by a Volvo again and feel just dandy about it. He
Christopher Moore quotes: I try to stick to one, single rule, "If you don't have anything to say, shut the fuck up." I think that's in the Bible or something. I try to stick to one, single rule, "If you don't have anything to say, shut the fuck up." I think that's in the Bible or something.
Christopher Moore quotes: To be safe is to be afraid. To be safe is to be afraid.
Christopher Moore quotes: Alpha Males may lead the armies of the world, but it's the Betas who actually get the shit blowed up. Alpha Males may lead the armies of the world, but it's the Betas who actually get the shit blowed up.
Christopher Moore quotes: I know you're busy dating actresses and psychopaths. I know you're busy dating actresses and psychopaths.
Christopher Moore quotes: Look, I've always had an empty place in my life that I've alternatively tried to fill with food and penises, but now I have something. Look, I've always had an empty place in my life that I've alternatively tried to fill with food and penises, but now I have something.
Christopher Moore quotes: The reason I'm writing funny books is that I wish there were more. The reason I'm writing funny books is that I wish there were more.
Christopher Moore quotes: Splendid. I believe we've achieved a whole new level of doomed. Splendid. I believe we've achieved a whole new level of doomed.
Christopher Moore quotes: I'm painting moments. Unrepeatable, singular moments of light. I'm painting moments. Unrepeatable, singular moments of light.
Christopher Moore quotes: Thou wretched pillar of syphilitic pheasant-fuck! Thou wretched pillar of syphilitic pheasant-fuck!
Christopher Moore quotes: But she's a redhead, so she's probably evil, even at her tender age.""I thought you liked redheads.""I do. What's your point? But she's a redhead, so she's probably evil, even at her tender age."
"I thought you liked redheads."
"I do. What's your point?
Christopher Moore quotes: I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck. I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck.
Christopher Moore quotes: Lonliness evaporated off of them like the steam off dry ice, and by morning it was just a cloud on the ceiling of the room, then gone with the light. Lonliness evaporated off of them like the steam off dry ice, and by morning it was just a cloud on the ceiling of the room, then gone with the light.
Christopher Moore quotes: Evil is our trade, but not so deep a darkness as politics. Evil is our trade, but not so deep a darkness as politics.
Christopher Moore quotes: You were supposed to empathize with your friend's problem, but they were, after all, your friend's problems ... You were supposed to empathize with your friend's problem, but they were, after all, your friend's problems ...
Christopher Moore quotes: You have to reward them when they do what you want. I tried punishing them when they misbehaved, but the hammer seemed to crush their spirit. You have to reward them when they do what you want. I tried punishing them when they misbehaved, but the hammer seemed to crush their spirit.
Christopher Moore quotes: If you do your job and assume that everyone else is incompetent, you will seldom be disappointed. If you do your job and assume that everyone else is incompetent, you will seldom be disappointed.
Christopher Moore quotes: There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon. There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon.
Christopher Moore quotes: And then I see that the old vampyre is charred like Wile E. Coyote after a bad rocket shoes test. And then I see that the old vampyre is charred like Wile E. Coyote after a bad rocket shoes test.
Christopher Moore quotes: We will bring your guilt as well. You wouldn't have escaped it anyway. It is a parent's gift. We will bring your guilt as well. You wouldn't have escaped it anyway. It is a parent's gift.
Christopher Moore quotes: We'll help," said one boy, his finger far enough up his nose to tickle a memory nesting in his frontal lobe. We'll help," said one boy, his finger far enough up his nose to tickle a memory nesting in his frontal lobe.
Christopher Moore quotes: I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry. I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry.
Christopher Moore quotes: Will there be heinous fuckery, Pocket? Will there be heinous fuckery, Pocket?
Christopher Moore quotes: Night crawled across the desert sky like a black cat with phosphorus dandruff. Night crawled across the desert sky like a black cat with phosphorus dandruff.
Christopher Moore quotes: Pain travels pretty well. Pain travels pretty well.
Christopher Moore quotes: He invented Kung Fu when translated to English means method by which short, bald guys can kick the bejeezus out of you. He invented Kung Fu when translated to English means method by which short, bald guys can kick the bejeezus out of you.
Christopher Moore quotes: Evolution doesn't really have a destination. It's just dicking around with possibilities. Evolution doesn't really have a destination. It's just dicking around with possibilities.
Christopher Moore quotes: He was continually surprised at the speed and accuracy of her creepiness. She was like some creepiness child prodigy He was continually surprised at the speed and accuracy of her creepiness. She was like some creepiness child prodigy
Christopher Moore quotes: Joseph had regained his composure by now. Evidently, once you accept that your wife slept with God, extraordinary events seem sort of commonplace. Joseph had regained his composure by now. Evidently, once you accept that your wife slept with God, extraordinary events seem sort of commonplace.
Christopher Moore quotes: He'd replace the window, but the kid was sleeping in his room from now until she was thirty and married to a huge guy with ninja skills. He'd replace the window, but the kid was sleeping in his room from now until she was thirty and married to a huge guy with ninja skills.
Christopher Moore quotes: He was a writer and words were his weapons. He was a writer and words were his weapons.
Christopher Moore quotes: There's always a bloody ghost. There's always a bloody ghost.
Christopher Moore quotes: Well, you know, she was winded for a few minutes from kicking your ass, but she is just a little girl." The Well, you know, she was winded for a few minutes from kicking your ass, but she is just a little girl." The
Christopher Moore quotes: You don't hurry a thinker, and you don't talk to him when he's thinking. It's just inconsiderate. You don't hurry a thinker, and you don't talk to him when he's thinking. It's just inconsiderate.
Christopher Moore quotes: Nothing fucks up a religion like an intervention from a real God. Nothing fucks up a religion like an intervention from a real God.
Christopher Moore quotes: As Richard Pryor was to Eddie Murphy, that's what Kurt Vonnegut was to me. As Richard Pryor was to Eddie Murphy, that's what Kurt Vonnegut was to me.
Christopher Moore quotes: Life is messy. Would that every puzzle piece fell into place, every word was kind, every accident happy, but such is not the case. Life is messy Life is messy. Would that every puzzle piece fell into place, every word was kind, every accident happy, but such is not the case. Life is messy
Christopher Moore quotes: He had a plan - and a bus pass with four more days left on it - so this son of a bitch had picked the wrong guy to fuck He had a plan - and a bus pass with four more days left on it - so this son of a bitch had picked the wrong guy to fuck with.
Christopher Moore quotes: Is it so hard for you to give up what you never had? Is it so hard for you to give up what you never had?
Christopher Moore quotes: And he was like "The sedative in the blood, blah, blah, four hours, blah, blah, nerdspeak, geektalk -" -Abby And he was like "The sedative in the blood, blah, blah, four hours, blah, blah, nerdspeak, geektalk -" -Abby
Christopher Moore quotes: You tell soldiers what they need to hear to go to war. Bitches need a mission, not a goal. You tell soldiers what they need to hear to go to war. Bitches need a mission, not a goal.
Christopher Moore quotes: You whoreson scalawag!" said I. "You flesh-turd dropped stinking from the poxy arsehole of a hare-lipped harlot! You whoreson scalawag!" said I. "You flesh-turd dropped stinking from the poxy arsehole of a hare-lipped harlot!
Christopher Moore quotes: It's like time travel only, you know, slower... It's like time travel only, you know, slower...
Christopher Moore quotes: She's so small, yet she contains so much evil. She's so small, yet she contains so much evil.
Christopher Moore quotes: Oh, how the pillars of lust can crumble under the weight of stupidity. Oh, how the pillars of lust can crumble under the weight of stupidity.
Christopher Moore quotes: I really don't think of my work in terms of a genre. I think of it in terms of what I want to say, what I think is cool, and I really don't think of my work in terms of a genre. I think of it in terms of what I want to say, what I think is cool, and what I'm good at.
Christopher Moore quotes: The measure of a man's power is the depth of his mercy. The measure of a man's power is the depth of his mercy.
Christopher Moore quotes: You do not cause death, you do not prevent death, you are a servant of Destiny, not its agent. Get over yourself. You do not cause death, you do not prevent death, you are a servant of Destiny, not its agent. Get over yourself.
Christopher Moore quotes: One can't be free without action. One can't be free without action.
Christopher Moore quotes: Where do you think this guy is leading us?' 'Probably somewhere to murder and kill us.' 'Yeah, at least one of those. Where do you think this guy is leading us?' 'Probably somewhere to murder and kill us.' 'Yeah, at least one of those.
Christopher Moore quotes: She laughed. My favorite music. She laughed. My favorite music.
Christopher Moore quotes: For it is written that if the wise man appears always stupid, his failures do not disappoint, and his success gives pleasant surprise. For it is written that if the wise man appears always stupid, his failures do not disappoint, and his success gives pleasant surprise.
Christopher Moore quotes: The key to retaining their respect was to find out what they wanted to do, then tell them to do it. The key to retaining their respect was to find out what they wanted to do, then tell them to do it.
Christopher Moore quotes: War is the lifeblood of this merchant republic. War is the lifeblood of this merchant republic.
Christopher Moore quotes: All killer whales are named Kevin. You knew that, right? All killer whales are named Kevin. You knew that, right?
Christopher Moore quotes: Love: the sickest of Irony's sick jokes. The place where logic and order go to die. Love: the sickest of Irony's sick jokes. The place where logic and order go to die.
Christopher Moore quotes: I'm not nearly as outrageously brave as many of my rascals that I write. But I think the rascal spirit must reside in me somewhere. I'm not nearly as outrageously brave as many of my rascals that I write. But I think the rascal spirit must reside in me somewhere.
Christopher Moore quotes: I love you, Lucien, but I am a muse, you are an artist, I am not here to make you comfortable. I love you, Lucien, but I am a muse, you are an artist, I am not here to make you comfortable.
Christopher Moore quotes: Compliment but do not covet. Compliment but do not covet.
Christopher Moore quotes: Do not bonk the Juliette Do not bonk the Juliette
Christopher Moore quotes: There is no such thing as a conservative hero. There is no such thing as a conservative hero.
Christopher Moore quotes: Is "ho" always feminine, and "muthafucka" always masculine, while "bitch" can be either? How Is "ho" always feminine, and "muthafucka" always masculine, while "bitch" can be either? How
Christopher Moore quotes: Shoes off in the whale! And don't try and make a break for the anus. Shoes off in the whale! And don't try and make a break for the anus.

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