Robert Schimmel quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Robert Schimmel

Robert Schimmel Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Robert Schimmel on Wise Famous Quotes.

Robert Schimmel quotes: What do you say when your friends come to visit and the dog starts humping their leg. Well, if it's a pit bull, you say, "You better let him finish."

What do you say when your friends come to visit and the dog starts humping their leg. Well, if it's a pit bull, you say, "You better let him finish."

Robert Schimmel quotes: I went to rent a car, and the guy goes, 'Do you want the extra insurance?' I said, 'Why ... am I gonna get into an extra accident?

I went to rent a car, and the guy goes, 'Do you want the extra insurance?' I said, 'Why ... am I gonna get into an extra accident?

Robert Schimmel quotes: How do blind people know when they're done wiping their ass?

How do blind people know when they're done wiping their ass?

Robert Schimmel quotes: Because when you're laughing, there is no other emotion in that moment except for joy.

Because when you're laughing, there is no other emotion in that moment except for joy.

Robert Schimmel quotes: I'm not ready to die. Period. To begin with, I cannot imagine a future without me in it. Can't do it.

I'm not ready to die. Period. To begin with, I cannot imagine a future without me in it. Can't do it.

Robert Schimmel quotes: My mom told me when I was younger that when you jack off all of your dead relatives are watching. But then I figured who were they going to tell.

My mom told me when I was younger that when you jack off all of your dead relatives are watching. But then I figured who were they going to tell.

Robert Schimmel quotes: You know you're out of shape when you have a heart attack when you're watching television.

You know you're out of shape when you have a heart attack when you're watching television.