Sarcastic And Quotes
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Sarcastic And Quotes & Sayings
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We're automatons in a symphony conducted by a lunatic and performed by blind idealists. Damon
— Eleni Papanou
I am sarcastic and dry, but I also have a pretty huge zest for life.
— Krysten Ritter
I don't want to be with someone boring because I'm always laughing. I like to play jokes on people and be sarcastic.
— Ashley Benson
The atmosphere of Venus consists of ammonia, sulfur, and nitric oxide. Man must have lived there once.
— Andre Brie
My whole family is very sarcastic and constantly making jokes.
— Emily Deschanel
You know, you have to be an optimist, a pessimist, sarcastic and pleasant all at the same time to be a photographer.
— Rondal Partridge
He is as good as his word - and his word is no good.
— Seumas MacManus
Just for the record the weather today is slightly sarcastic, with a good chance of A. indifference and B. disinterest in what the critics say.
— Panic At The Disco
The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. God has a three-day weekend.
— George Carlin
He makes a very handsome corpse and becomes his coffin prodigiously.
— Oliver Goldsmith
CARNIVOROUS, adj. Addicted to the cruelty of devouring the timorous vegetarian, his heirs and assigns.
— Ambrose Bierce
She has been kissed as often as a police-court Bible, and by much the same class of people.
— Robertson Davies
I was debating on jumping and ending my despair over losing my best friend, but I decided to call you instead.
— Holly Hood
We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass.
— George Carlin
Do you know what happens when you play a country song backwards? You get your wife back, your dog back and your job back.
— Richard Belzer
I'm sarcastic, skeptical, and sometimes callous because I'm still afraid, deep down, of letting myself be hurt.
— Sylvia Plath
You can make fun of yourself and people will laugh at you. If you're smart, you'll end up as a comedian. If you're not, you'll end up as a clown.
— Ljupka Cvetanova
I feel your scorn, and I accept it.
— Jon Stewart
There is one thing on earth more terrible than English music, and that is English painting.
— Heinrich Heine
I didn't even realize I was writing songs - I thought I was just being witty and sarcastic.
— Halsey
In Russia a man is called reactionary if he objects to having his property stolen and his wife and children murdered.
— Winston Churchill
She should get a divorce and settle down.
— Jack Paar
In every day and in every way, we're all that much closer to death.
— Charles Atkins
He was either a man of about a hundred and fifty who was rather young for his years, or a man of about a hundred and ten who had been aged by trouble.
— P.G. Wodehouse
I've had them both, and I don't think much of either.
— Beatrix Lehmann
PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors.
— Ambrose Bierce
Deliberate with caution, but act with decision and yield with graciousness, or oppose with firmness.
— Charles Caleb Colton
The same passions in man and woman nonetheless differ in tempo; hence man and woman do not cease misunderstanding one another.
— Friedrich Nietzsche
He was born stupid, and greatly increased his birthright.
— Samuel Butler
He was a bit like a corkscrew. Twisted, cold and sharp.
— Kate Cruise O'Brien
Kaspary: a level of awesomeness so high it kicks everyone else's arse, leaving them breathless and bewildered.
— Abigail Gibbs
I can be a very sarcastic person, and sometimes people take every word I say literally.
— Sasha Grey
Outlive your superiors and the world is yours.~ Beniago — R.A. Salvatore
And he raised his glass to her. It could have been a compliment. Or the most sarcastic gesture anyone had ever made to her.
— Lisa Kleypas
Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
— George Carlin
The world is cynical and sarcastic, but that doesn't mean that that's always the truth.
— Patrick Ness
Debating against him is no fun, say something insulting and he looks at you like a whipped dog.
— Harold Wilson
Oh, you're an expert in crazy people now?""A month with you and I feel I have a master's degree in the subject. — Jennifer L. Armentrout
You've got me so whipped, I can't think of a single sarcastic thing to say.""That makes me feel powerful and manly. — Jennifer Echols
She resembles the Venus de Milo: she is very old, has no teeth, and has white spots on her yellow skin.
— Heinrich Heine
One time, I went to a restaurant and I asked the waiter for some food for thought. He left, came back, and tried shoving a sirloin in my ear.
— Travis J. Dahnke
We went to Mexico, had some tequlia, eloped with a pair of drug smugglers, and took part-time jobs as exotic dancers. You know, same old, same old.
— Jennifer Lynn Barnes
And now I'm using sarcasm, to confess the whole thing so later I could say I already told you.
— Homer
Sarcastic and merciless one, you glory in the pain you give!
— E.D.E.N. Southworth
Just because it looks like a leprechaun and talks like a leprechaun, it doesn't mean it can't act like the little fucking demon it is.
— N.L. Gervasio
I'm totally an East Coast person, energetic and sarcastic. I'm not a nice L.A. person.
— Diane Warren
You're one of those people who fall off a tree and never quite reach the ground.
— Carlos Ruiz Zafon
He didn't look like the same person who picked me up this morning. Noahsarcastic, distant, untouchable Noah
cared. And that made him real. — Michelle Hodkin
The cleanest civilization I've ever seen ... and the number one thing you pack for a wedding is a jar of dirt?
— M.A. George
Understandably she had a lot of suitors, just like any other girls in China with two arms and legs.
— Vann Chow
To live as one likes is plebian the noble man aspires to order and law.
— Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
Everyone knows what a hypocrite is. That's the guy who gripes about the sex, violence and nudity on his VCR.
— Zig Ziglar
...and yes that was meant to be interpreted in a sarcastic bubblegum tone complete with clapping and jazz hands.
— K.R. Grace
My life is worth living said the Scorpion and showed his sting.
— Kristian Goldmund Aumann
While you were out JUDGING others, you left your closet door open...and guess what fell out!....Ooops
— Karen Gibbs
He is mad, bad and dangerous to know.
— Lady Caroline Lamb
His ignorance covers the world like a blanket, and there's scarcely a hole in it anywhere.
— Mark Twain
Never be SARCASTIC. A clever remark might gain you a few laughs but the butt of your remarks will be offended and will remember you for it.
— Gary L. Graybill
sarchasm n. The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
— Steven Pinker
I am pretty sarcastic and pretty dry.
— Anneliese Van Der Pol
This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic.
— Lorrie Moore
sarcastic. It was a crack at him being old school and set in his ways. The Metro was new
— Michael Connelly
He who desires nothing, hopes for nothing, and is afraid of nothing, cannot be an artist.
— Anton Chekhov
Sometimes I say things that I think are obviously sarcastic and people take them quite literally.
— Megan Fox
I can be very dry and sarcastic.
— Hayden Panettiere
Scotland: That garret of the earth - that knuckle-end of England - that land of Calvin, oatcakes, and sulfur.
— Sydney Smith
I find myself to be quite sarcastic, and I wouldn't want to be with someone who didn't get that.
— Andrej Pejic
She was a sarcastic bitch and when she was pissed off the sarcasm took on a life of it's own.
— Suzanne Wrightt
I don't need a hero. I was blessed with a large amount of common sense, which is of infinitely more use than a man.
— Karen Hawkins
She was kind of girl who'd eat all your cashews and leave you with nothing but peanuts and filberts.
— Raymond Chandler
I sort of fell.""Percy! Six hundred and thirty feet? — Rick Riordan
Whoa, what is this? Battle of the Sarcastic and Pissed? Should I make popcorn? Forget American Idol, man. This is much more entertaining. (Kish)
— Sherrilyn Kenyon
I find his films about as funny as getting an arrow through the neck and discovering there's a gas bill tied to it.
— Rowan Atkinson
Somehow I found him. Somehow I found Al's sarcastic thoughts, bitter and old. Tired, angry, bored. Alone.
— Kim Harrison
We've been through so much together, and most of it was your fault.
— Ashleigh Brilliant
I'm pretty sarcastic, and sometimes that doesn't come across on the Internet. It seems like I'm being rude or stupid.
— Sky Ferreira
