Santa Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Santa
Santa Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Santa quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.
— Bob Phillips
You can't trick The Universe - it's like Santa Claus that way.
— Tracy McMillan
I like the fact that people are surprised by my age. I like the fact that I get carded.
— Cara Santa Maria
Being alone at night is scary sometimes.
— Leo Santa Cruz
When Tim Allen made The Santa Clause, I thought that was a delightful film. It took a modern sensibility but layered onto it a kind of sentiment.
— Leonard Maltin
Gotta keep an eye on those terrorist polar bears, and make sure Santa's elves aren't planning a holy war.
— Graham McNamee
Have you ever wanted to put on a Santa suit?""I have always wanted to do that," said Carter gravely. — Richelle Mead
I was once part of a Christmas cabaret. I sang 'I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.' I tap-danced. I had a ten-gallon hat. It was quite absurd.
— Peter Dinklage
Money solves nothing but it eases everything.
— Santa Montefiore
The only thing wrong with the U.S. economy is the failure of the Republican Party to play Santa Claus,
— Jude Wanniski
This I've learned in life: If you don't believe in Santa Claus, he can't bring you any presents.
— Siri Mitchell
She stared at the castle. She had actually been summoned to a castle. A week before Christmas.
— Fern Michaels
Unwisely, Santa offered a teddy bear to James, unawarehe had been mauled by a grizzly earlier this year. — Tim Burton
I don't believe in right or left; I don't believe in Santa or Satan. I believe in things I can touch - like vodka and Oreos.
— Christopher Titus
Reading is one of the best ways to bond with your child. Bond this Christmas with "It's Not About You, Mr. Santa Claus
— Soraya Diase Coffelt
A man of fifty looks as old as Santa Claus to a girl of twenty.
— William Feather
I joined the board of the Santa Fe Institute.
— Esther Dyson
Those North Korean hackers are at it again. Earlier today they leaked Santa's naughty list.
— David Letterman
Why doesn't Santa just park the god-damn sleigh in the driveway like a normal guest? (Your Temporary Santa)
— David Levithan
God? Nope." requel's smile told me she was joking around to make this easier for me "santa clause? No again.
— Claudia Gray
Dear Santa, WTF...
— Darynda Jones
So I've started wearing sweatpants to bed because I really don't need Santa seeing me in my underwear.
— Jeff Kinney
Tilli stroked her Chihuahua. Max's heart made a sound like the sleigh bells on Mrs. Santa Claus's dildo.
— Tom Robbins
So Santa Claus is bogus but Grim Reapers are the genuine article. What does that say about the world?
— Mindee Arnett
Prayer is not adult letters written to Santa Claus, and God is not some parent-like figure up in the sky who's going to take care of us.
— John Shelby Spong
When I walk up the piazza of Santa Croce I feel as if it were not a Florentine nor an European church but a church built by and for the human race.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
There are a few YouTube clips of me singing at The King's Head in Santa Monica, so you can see how bad I am.
— Vinnie Jones
Because I am still a little girl who believes in Santa and the tooth fairy and you.
— Laurie Halse Anderson
Santa was a fake.
— Stephen Lawrence
With big folks, either people think you look mean or it's more of a jolly Santa Claus, 'Oh, he's just a pudgy little teddy bear pillow.'
— The Notorious B.I.G.
An entire gullible nation believed faithfully in Santa Claus. But Santa Claus was really the Gasman.
— Gunter Grass
I'm going to North Pole to help out Santa this year.
— Jimmy Fallon
Santa knows Physics: Of all colors, Red Light penetrates fog best. That's why Benny the Blue-nosed reindeer never got the gig.
— Neil DeGrasse Tyson
The title of that great Christmas song was 'Boogie Woogie Santa Claus,' and no one ever heard of it.
— Patti Page
God is a Republican, and Santa Claus is a Democrat.
— H.L. Mencken
Everyone thinks of God as a man - you can't help it - Santa Claus was a man, therefore God has to be a man.
— Patti Smith
I said that Santa no longer traffics in coal. Instead, if you're bad he comes to your house and steals things.
— David Sedaris
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
— Steven Wright
Grandmother's knee is a wonderful place to learn about the Bible, ghosts, and even Santa Claus, but a mighty poor place to learn about history.
— L.B. Taylor Jr.
Every year, dads will dress up as Santa and try to surprise their kids by coming down the chimney, and every year, a dad gets stuck and dies.
— Kyle Dunnigan
So, Santa's gone gangsta?
— S.J. Harper
I still believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and true love. Don't even try to tell me different.
— Dolly Parton
Like everyone in his right mind, I feared Santa Claus.
— Annie Dillard
I don't like good kids being corrupted by bad ones, Santa never does".The Santa Killer — Stuart Francis
I felt like a kid at Santa Claus's funeral.
— David Gerrold
I live in a cabin in Santa Cruz.
— Nell Newman
He continues to smile expectantly. I take a step back. I don't want to catch whatever he has. He is a disturbing out-of-uniform Santa.
— Augusten Burroughs
Besides, the mhis that surrounded the compound could scramble anything from GPS to Santa Claus.
— J.R. Ward
We're not mad at God, just like atheists don't hate Santa or Unicorns, they're just not there!
— Hemant Mehta
I feel warm and reassured," I whispered. "He's like Santa.
— Maureen Johnson
One of the things I had a hard time getting used to when I came to California in '78 was Santa Claus in shorts.
— Dennis Franz
Maybe we should spend less time teaching kids to believe in Santa and more time teaching them to believe in themselves.
— Brooke Hampton
I live in Santa Barbara. My wife's American, and she lived in England for 11 years and then told me she'd had enough.
— Martin Gore
How about that one?""That fat thing?"
"Amber, it is a Christmas tree. It is supposed to be fat and jolly looking, like Santa Clause. — Sarah Holman
I know who I want to fight, but I don't pick my opponents; I leave it up to my team. They make those kinds of decisions. My job is to fight and win.
— Leo Santa Cruz
Talk about cheap - on Christmas Eve, my neighbour shoots off three blanks and tells his kids Santa Claus just committed suicide.
— Milton Berle
You better watch out. You better not cry.
You better not pout,
I'm telling you why,
Cause Santa Clause might put a cap in your ass. — Craig Ferguson
Holy Santa Claus shit, Nic!
— Kathryn Perez
God is Santa Claus for Grown-Ups.
— Oliver Markus
Can you imagine getting a gun for a secret Santa? That is especially not a good idea if you work in a post office.
— Chelsea Handler
Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!
— Francis Pharcellus Church
Like Santa Claus. You adults pretend he doesn't exist, but we know that he really does.
— Orson Scott Card
Kids believe in Santa; adults believe in childhood.
— Cate Kennedy
I'm so glad I put a hot, naked guy on my Christmas wish list. I just didn't think Santa would actually deliver one.
— Patricia W. Fischer
Look, at some point, people have to tell their kids that Santa Claus isn't real. I hate to be the guy to do it, but it's just not real.
— Floyd Landis
Santa Claus is just a story," says Seth. "He's just the opening band to God. There is no Santa Claus.
— Chuck Palahniuk
I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
— Dick Gregory
What are you wearing?" She'd never done this before, but a mutual exchange of information seemed reasonable. "Santa suit.
— Samanthe Beck
Santa Clara County v. Southern Pacific Railroad.
— Daniel Suarez
Jeez! I thought you said you were just gonna set up the tree? It looks like Santa shit Christmas in here!
— Toni Aleo
Maybe he was the anti-Santa, of the South Pole, and he was going to show them where the elves made lumps of coal for Anti-Christmas.
— Lev Grossman
All the world is happy when Santa Claus comes.
— Maud Lindsay
