Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won't run.
—
Phyllis Diller

2 Guys in a health club, one is putting on
pantyhose. "Since when do you wear
pantyhose?" "Since my wife found it in the glove compartment!" —
Henny Youngman

Scientific questions cannot be decided by majority vote in any case. —
Stephen Jay Gould

One time I laughed so hard, I just had to go and change my
pantyhose. I lost it. Lost it. At least it wasn't onstage. —
Anne Meara

There was a battered desk with its drawers open and askew, like a lady of the night with her heels kicked off and
pantyhose around her ankles. —
Jen Frederick

September is
pantyhose month. No nonsense. —
Dave Parker

Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl. —
Ernest Hemingway,

Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn't hear them. —
Bob Hope

If we can put a man on the moon, we can make
pantyhose comfortable. —
Sara Blakely

Marriage is like
pantyhose. It all depends on what you put into it. —
Phyllis Schlafly

We will stand on principle or we will not stand at all. —
Margaret Thatcher

Reed Scott is really good at coming up with insults. —
Timothy Simons

You want flowers, I'll buy your ass a rose,
But later on you're comin' out them
pantyhose. —
Too $hort

Each divorce is the death of a small civilization. —
Pat Conroy

Have faith in humankind a respect for what is earthly and an unfaltering belief in peace and understanding —
Tracy Chapman

I think of a monument as being symbolic and for the people and therefore rhetorical, not honest, not personal. —
Claes Oldenburg