Nick Offerman Quotes
Collection of top 89 famous quotes about Nick Offerman
Nick Offerman Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Nick Offerman quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
Instead of playing Draw Something, fucking draw something
— Nick Offerman
When I first met with agents, they said, "Okay, you're going to play plumbers and mechanics and bus drivers and farmers. Go."
— Nick Offerman
My education began in theater school, and it continues to this day. I just continued learning to be a better performer.
— Nick Offerman
Shut your damn mouth.
— Nick Offerman
If you don't look at yourself and evaluate it, you instead see how the world's reacting to it.
— Nick Offerman
I come from the theater, where I got into acting because I love transforming. I love nothing more than to be unrecognizable.
— Nick Offerman
No one will ever ask me to sing because it's beautiful. My secret is hiding my musicianship behind humor.
— Nick Offerman
Branding is quite an important thing. As an artist, you want to be able to explore facets of yourself.
— Nick Offerman
If you like comedy, go home and curl up with Leviticus. The writers of The Onion are handed Leviticus on their first day.
— Nick Offerman
Don't use barbiturates before going on stage. And be honest.
— Nick Offerman
Really, all religious teachings can be boiled down to: Just be cool. Don't be an asshole.
— Nick Offerman
If properly dried and trimmed, New York-style pizza could be used to make a box for Chicago-style pizza.
— Nick Offerman
I really thought that I'd be doing Shakespeare, honest to God. I did not foresee the whole action television thing. That was God's joke.
— Nick Offerman
When I got my job on 'Parks,' it was so dreamy, kind of unfathomable. I didn't think a job that excellent could exist for me.
— Nick Offerman
Technically, we're all half centaur.
— Nick Offerman
I like to play women who are not strong at all, because, there's certainly plenty of myself that is no kind of a warrior.
— Nick Offerman
I spent a lot of my youth working outside in the elements, and I kind of revel in defeating tough weather.
— Nick Offerman
I think that laziness in many ways is the human condition, and that's what has led us to this place where, as we've developed technology.
— Nick Offerman
I would like Americans to make things with their hands. Thomas Jefferson and I feel that makes for a much stronger nation.
— Nick Offerman
A lot of people find themselves in the entertainment business - or perhaps society steers them toward it - because they're beautiful.
— Nick Offerman
I think that purity creates not only a higher level of artistic vision but a purer work ethic.
— Nick Offerman
We realized that the world of popular culture had been creating the perfect candidate for many years: the female champion of the universe.
— Nick Offerman
The key lies in finding the delicious flavorings in one's life, no matter how fancy your blue jeans may or may not be.
— Nick Offerman
Actually, I'm not super-kickass at a lot of things.
— Nick Offerman
I have a wonderfully hedonistic appetite, and if I wasn't really strict with myself, I'd weigh 300 pounds. I'm not good with moderation.
— Nick Offerman
When things get bad enough, all you can do is laugh.
— Nick Offerman
Damn it all, you have been given a life on this beautiful planet! Get off your ass and do something!
— Nick Offerman
I awaken. I consume oxygen, then bacon, eggs and black coffee, then my wife, then bacon.
— Nick Offerman
Whatever it is you like to do, that's the sexiest part of you.
— Nick Offerman
You know, it's hard to beat bacon at anytime of day. But I also am a big fan of corned beef hash.
— Nick Offerman
I always call myself a "student" of the guitar.
— Nick Offerman
I've been working steadily as an actor since around 1998. I wasn't well known in the public, but I was a dependable working journeyman.
— Nick Offerman
My career is inexplicable to me. So far I've just been not getting fired despite being myself.
— Nick Offerman
When I got to Los Angeles, I started building cabins in peoples' yards, building post-and-beam structures and cutting the joinery for those.
— Nick Offerman
If I put down my tweeter machine for a minute, I actually can communicate with people. As an aside, astonishingly, I just started doing Twitter.
— Nick Offerman
I'm quite excited to not play a Xena type character - it's probably closer to me than any character I've ever played.
— Nick Offerman
No matter how you decide to spend a little more time on your gestures of giving, the point is just quite simply that you do.
— Nick Offerman
but, like an alcoholic or a fan of the Dave Matthews Band, he ultimately couldn't control his self-destructive addiction.
— Nick Offerman
I've had to learn and discipline myself that I'm much happier and much less depressed if I give myself a project. It's just that simple.
— Nick Offerman
I am a saxophone player.
— Nick Offerman
Being a man of the theater and a hedonist, I find the idea of building coffins very romantic.
— Nick Offerman
I don't put a great deal of stock in art trophies.
— Nick Offerman
If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, then your pants are tucked into your shirt.
— Nick Offerman
We didn't have to do anything to have a good time. It's an incredible gift to be able to make your own fun.
— Nick Offerman
It's funny, growing up there was never anybody around me with any kind of artistic bent.
— Nick Offerman
Jobs that require a suit upset me. They displease me much, as our world is rife with such superficial conformity.
— Nick Offerman
If you want to be happy in life, consider yourself a student. Every day of your life, think: how can I improve?
— Nick Offerman
I'm always pleased that I managed to stay out of jail throughout my tenure in Chicago.
— Nick Offerman
Follow your gut, make a choice, and throw yourself into it. If you make a mistake, then you have merely afforded yourself a valuable lesson.
— Nick Offerman
I keep having these bros come up to me and say, "I used to watch you when I was a fetus," and I just want to kill them.
— Nick Offerman
If I had more time, I'd watch more woodworking or home-improvement shows, but, not enough hours in the day.
— Nick Offerman
Whenever I have a stubborn position on something, I take a deep breath and swallow myself.
— Nick Offerman
The ultimate disguise is nothing. Nudity.
— Nick Offerman
I never went too long without a job. The problem was a lot of the early jobs are almost more demoralizing than unemployment.
— Nick Offerman
People are afraid that they're going to upset somebody on top, and so there's a real sense of, I've got to be quiet, I don't want to be fired.
— Nick Offerman
I always drastically changed my look for each role. It's gotten a little tedious in real life, also, because there's no hiding.
— Nick Offerman
How lucky my life is that I have two arms, and two legs, and ten fingers with which to make things out of wood.
— Nick Offerman
It's taken me a lot of years to peel away my own layers.
— Nick Offerman
I've split my life between a few different disciplines.
— Nick Offerman
Before people figured out I was funny, I got cast quite a bit as either a rapist or serial killer or the guy who catches those people.
— Nick Offerman
When we think of an actor, we think of a tanned, frosted-tipped, model-looking guy. We don't think of a plumber.
— Nick Offerman
I learned as a young man that I don't write jokes, but that I can deliver more mundane material and get a laugh. I call myself a humorist.
— Nick Offerman
I am always so happy to be at 'SNL.' I still feel like a kid when I'm there, like I can't believe I'm watching them make the show.
— Nick Offerman
I always had a lot of confidence in my work and the unique flavor I like to bring to my characters, but you know I'm not a huge dreamer.
— Nick Offerman
I really bridled when Parks And Rec became popular and woodworking publications wanted me to do stuff with them.
— Nick Offerman
I come from a family of fishermen. Fishing is very important to us. We don't hunt. We're not gun folk.
— Nick Offerman
Pursue decency in all dealings with your fellow man and woman. Simply put? Don't be an asshole.
— Nick Offerman
What will people say? Who fucking cares.
— Nick Offerman
