Morning Funny Quotes
Collection of top 38 famous quotes about Morning Funny
Morning Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Morning Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
The mark of a good party is that you wake up the next morning wanting to change your name and start a new life in a different city.
— Vance Bourjaily
I feel sorry for James Blunt, he has to wake up every morning and think 'Oh my God, I'm James Blunt, what have I done?'
— Bill Bailey
If you think I'm one of those people who try to be funny at breakfast you're wrong. I'm invariably ill-tempered in the early morning.
— Daphne Du Maurier
Every morning I read the obituaries. If it ain't there I make myself a cup of tea and carry on like I have the past century or so.
— Lois Greiman
I threw my hand over my mouth and blurted out the first best excuse I could come up with, Morning breath!
— Melissa Aragon
I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning ... That can keep me awake for days..
— Billy Connolly
It was 10:30 in the morning and I was already running behind. This is hardly unusual, but it pisses me off every single time.
— Julie Powell
I'm going to marry a Jewish woman because I like the idea of getting up Sunday morning and going to the deli.
— Michael J. Fox
And the last thought he had that morning as he closed his eyes was: I hope the tornado hit the moose.
— Gary Paulsen
There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up.
— Kristen Chandler
Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
— Rita Rudner
Satan impregnated my mother one lovely spring morning. We didn't have the heart to tell my father.
— Holly Hood
Friday and Saturday nights have a funny way of revealing what we really believe on Sunday mornings.
— Mark Hart
Be the kind of woman who, when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says Oh, no! She's up.
— Joanne Clancy
The sun never sets on the British Empire. But it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded.
— Steven Wright
Who the hell calls at two in the morning?""Maybe it's Matt Wilde, confessing his love," Lindsay says.
"Very funny, — Lauren Oliver
This morning someone sent me a very funny photo of me holding their puppy. We have matching colour jackets.
— Luke Treadaway
Sex when you're married is like going to the 7-Eleven: There's not much variety, but at three in the morning, it's always there.
— Carol Leifer
Resolve was never stronger than in the morning, after the night, when it was never weaker
— Mike Leigh
Lady, I didn't get up this morning wanting to be a jackass ... but you just pushed my jackass button.
— Bill Engvall
In the morning, people have a plan for that day. Hardworking people think of what they will do during the day, and idle people on what they should do.
— Eraldo Banovac
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."
— Rodney Dangerfield
I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
— Winston Churchill
You aren't a morning person, are you?" he mused."No, I'm not. There is a reason mornin' and mournin' sound the same. — L.A. Casey
