Jeff Foxworthy Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Jeff Foxworthy
Jeff Foxworthy Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Jeff Foxworthy quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
— Jeff Foxworthy
It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
— Jeff Foxworthy
I was talking to Alan Jackson. He had his second Greatest Hits album. He said, You don't ever get into this really thinking you're gonna make it.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if someone tells you you have something in your teeth, and you take them out to see what it is.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if there is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.
— Jeff Foxworthy
My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'?
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your biggest ambition in life is to git that big ole coon. The one what hangs 'round over yonder, back'ah Bubba's barn ...
— Jeff Foxworthy
If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If you think a quaterhorse is that ride in front of Kmart.. You might be a rednneck
— Jeff Foxworthy
If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Any job that posts a price list for your body parts is a bad job.
— Jeff Foxworthy
When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in your brain.
— Jeff Foxworthy
It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Louisiana has the best food on the planet if you don't really ask too much about what you're eating.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Little girls love dolls. They just don't love doll clothes. We've got four thousand dolls and ain't one of them got a stitch of clothes on.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.
— Jeff Foxworthy
There's no down time any more.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if it's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If you ahve ever unloaded your pickup by backing up really fast and slamming on the brakes, you might be a redneck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.
— Jeff Foxworthy
I really don't require a whole lot in life.
— Jeff Foxworthy
As a comedian I appreciate every kind of comedy. You decide for yourself what you're going to do.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for best picture.
— Jeff Foxworthy
I'm an outdoor nut. If I'm not working, I'm on a tractor on my farm, hunting, fishing or climbing a mountain.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication
— Jeff Foxworthy
I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.
— Jeff Foxworthy
We're a heart attack away from losing the right to bear arms.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Sacrificing myself to kill Hilary Clinton was the best thing I could possibly do for humanity
— Jeff Foxworthy
The biggest thing I've learned is to listen to my own gut. I have learned to trust my instincts.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If someone at Fleet Farm offers you assistance and they don't work there you might live in Wisconsin.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if an expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Sophisticated people invest their money in stock portfolios. Rednecks invest their money in commemorative plates.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Between New York and LA, there's 200 million people that aren't hip, and they don't want to be hip.
— Jeff Foxworthy
By the time we get to church, I need church cuz I've been yelled at by everyone in the family.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your 'huntin dog' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If you think the last four words to the national anthem are " gentleman, start your engines", You might be a redneck.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your dogs name is Miller Light
— Jeff Foxworthy
You know that you are a teacher when you spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.
— Jeff Foxworthy
If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges; he got guys off the fishing docks.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if ... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
— Jeff Foxworthy
I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if Exxon and Conoco have offered you royalties for your hair.
— Jeff Foxworthy
I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of a weird set to try to put together.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.
— Jeff Foxworthy
I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
— Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item.
— Jeff Foxworthy
