Jackass Quotes: top 76 famous quotes about Jackass

Jackass Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Jackass quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I don't think it's cool when I have to announce that I'm gluten-free; in fact, I feel like a total jackass 99.9 percent of the time. — April Peveteaux

Idiot! Lunatic! Moron! Jackass! Selfish irresponsible fool! — Stephenie Meyer

And I will not be beaten by that jackass."
"Jackass?" said Foaly, wounded. "My favorite uncle is a jackass. — Eoin Colfer

You're hammered, Jack!" Jenna yells back.
The male voice laughs. "Hammered Jack. Jack hammer. I'm a jackhammer."
"You're a jackass," she shouts — Chelsea Fine

The women take so little stock
In what I do or say
They'd sooner leave their cosseting
To hear a jackass bray ... — William Butler Yeats

Because a jackass brays doesn't mean you have to take it to heart. — Jeanne Phillips

Why did that jackass have to sit next to me? — Kody Keplinger

The title of the class was listed in fresh dark ink: Introduction to Not Being a Stupid Jackass. — Patrick Rothfuss

Every jackass going the roads thinks he has ideas. — James Joyce

But maybe she'd always been this fucking adorable and I'd just been the jackass who never bothered to notice. — Sarah Darlington

Jackass millionaires, hey, hey, Hollywood, here we come. — Brad Paisley

You know it's when like you parents said "I'm not mad at you, just disappointed" You know that hurts so much more. — Stephen "Steve-O" Glover

A pack of jackasses led by a lion is superior to a pack of lions led by a jackass. — George Washington

I love you, you stupid jackass. — Elle Kennedy

You stupid jackass," Ian said.
"Who's got the crush on a worm, bro? You gonna call me stupid? — Stephenie Meyer

Is everything okay with you and Jackass over there?" "I can hear you," Seth replied, dumping the eggs in a heated skillet. — Jennifer L. Armentrout

Why had she imagined he was attractive? He was absolutely the biggest, most complete and utter jackass she'd ever had the bad fortune to meet. — Christina Dodd

i aint the sharpest knife in the drawer , but i know enough to know that if your gonna be dumb you have to be tuff... i — Jose Torres

I have felt the swaying of the elephant's shoulders;
and now you want me to climb
on a jackass? Try to be serious. — Mirabai

You stupid, selfish, philandering coach-class jackass. — Kate Klise

Using porn to guide sexual activity, is like using Jackass to model behaviour. — Merlyn Gabriel Miller

I have learned that one of the most important rules in politics is poise - which means looking like an owl after you have behaved like a jackass. — Ronald Reagan

Comparing John to James is like comparing a racehorse to a jackass. — Donna Andersen

The water's not even blue, jackass. — Leah Clifford

Any jackass can talk about bombing Iran. — Chris Matthews

You once asked if I told Maxon about you, and I did. He knows exactly what a spineless, ungrateful jackass you are. — Kiera Cass

My proudest moment was when I was in high school, some jackass tried to give me a wedgy. I came prepared, I went commando. It tickled. — Jared Leto

It's a book, jackass. — Lane Smith

Air ye deaf, lass?
I think. He might have called me a hairy jackass — Karen Marie Moning

I wish for you four animals: a mink on the shoulders, a Jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bedroom, and a jackass to pay for it all. To you! — John Oldale

I once told Nixon that the Presidency is like being a jackass caught in a hail storm. You've got to just stand there and take it. — Lyndon B. Johnson

Yup," Heather replied. "Some jackass tries to prick me and I'm gonna prick him right back! Leave the bottle, bucko. Save ya a trip. — Jacob D. Lochner

How about this?" I said, because now it was the principle of the thing. "I'm sorry, jackass. — Rosemary Clement-Moore

You look like a Goth factory exploded all over you!" he called as she ran down the hall.
"Love you, too, jackass! — Rachel Caine

Jackass!" Eve yelled.
"You know, when people say that, I just hear the word awesome," Shane said. — Rachel Caine

But love doesn't make a mean drunk not a mean drunk or a narcissist not a narcissist or a jackass not a jackass. — Cheryl Strayed

Jessica: "You great drunken jackass!"
Dain: "I did not give you leave to use my Christian name. — Loretta Chase

Listen, I gather you have a problem working with a psychic. Believe me, I don't like working with a jackass any better. — Kim Harrington

Any jackass can kick down a barn, but it takes a good carpenter to build one. — Sam Rayburn

Don't try to win over the haters; you are not a jackass whisperer. — Brene Brown

Who would have thought working for an angry jackass would result in my getting fucked up against a cold window at work and liking it? — Christina Lauren

Take your patience pill ... You can be joyous, but you can't be a jackass. — Michael Nutter

A burger and fries will be fine, servant."
"I appreciate your order, jackass."
"As you should, beauty. — Bijou Hunter

More than one side? You're Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Jackass! — Chuck Palahniuk

Jackass, jackass on the wall, where's the info on Hex Hall? — Rachel Hawkins

That's where I'm comfortable - playing a jackass on the scene, rolling in with my pocket watch and my buffoon hairdo, with my shoes. — Alan Tudyk

A jackass can kick a barn down, but it takes a carpenter to build one. — Sam Rayburn

They?" he said, sounding apprehensive.
"Me. They're like me."
"Don't be a jackass," Roswell said, but not meanly. "No one's like you. — Brenna Yovanoff

An artist is like a woman who can do nothing but love, and who succumbs to every stray male jackass. — Heinrich Boll

Any jackass can kick down a barn. It takes a carpenter to build on. — Sam Rayburn

Did you ever know that you're a jackass? — Chris Jericho

Only a jackass ever talks over his affairs with a woman, whether she be his sweetheart, wife, or sister, or mother. — H.L. Mencken

Oh, sweetie, you are a jackass. I love you, but you are dumber than a one legged duck in an ass kicking contest when pigs fly. — Tara Sivec

All work and no play may make Jim a dull boy, but no work and all play makes Jim all kinds of a jackass. — William Randolph Hearst

When you call upon a Thoroughbred, he gives you all the speed, strength of heart and sinew in him. When you call on a jackass, he kicks. — Patricia Neal

Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass. — Mark Twain

He's practicing his Constitutional right to be a jackass. — Julie Miller

Being president is like being a jackass in a hailstorm. There's nothing to do but to stand there and take it. — Lyndon B. Johnson

The look of success, when it is worn a certain way, would infuriate a jackass. — Albert Camus

You treat me like a dog and you expect me to smile? You remind me of a jackass. — Stone Cold Steve Austin

Lady, I didn't get up this morning wanting to be a jackass ... but you just pushed my jackass button. — Bill Engvall

When wine drinkers tell me they taste notes of cherries, tobacco and rose petals, usually all I can detect is a whole lot of jackass. — Joel Stein

You look more of less the same."
She strode right past him. "And you still look like a jackass," she said sweetly. — Sarah J. Maas

But then, even with cuts, bruises and blood all over him, he looked like his jackass self again.
- Alex Gold — R.J. Morse, R.J. Brookes

I haven't been with anyone since my break-up with Jackass. Yes, Jackass is his name. Officially. — Adela Knight

The thing about letting yourself fall in love with a jackass was - you might be in love, but he was still a jackass. — Karen Robards

Just because a jackass brays does not mean you have to pay attention. — Jeanne Phillips

I moved to the counter. A note was propped on the register. Welcome home, Ms. Lane. Arrogant, overconfident jackass. — Karen Marie Moning

Shut up!" Eve yelled from somewhere upstairs. "Jackass!"
"You know, when people say that, I just hear the word awesome, — Rachel Caine

A woman could love a jackass. She could not love a son of a bitch. Many have tried, Gideon. Many have tried. — Deanna Raybourn

I just always had a penchant for performing for people.I'm a jackass clown. — Nick Offerman

That just proves there's something going on with you and Mr. Jackass. — Kody Keplinger

When I loved myself enough, I let the tomboy in me swing off the rope in Jackass Canyon. Yes! — Kim McMillen

But the reality is we often become our kindest, most ethical selves only by seeing what it feels like to be a selfish jackass first. — Cheryl Strayed

The rasp in his voice did her in. It wasn't the lazy boredom of a jackass who wanted a warm place to stick his dick. It was edgy. — Kit Rocha

UnMarketing: Don't try to win over the haters; you're not the jackass whisperer. — Brene Brown