It Not Funny Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about It Not Funny

It Not Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational It Not Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Normally, I try not to pay attention to my haters, but this time I'd like to talk about it, because my haters are my motivators. — Ellen DeGeneres

Am Anfang war Gott? It may have been true, but it was not germane. — Stephen Craig

You're funny, which you can't be if you're not smart. Dad says it's harder to make someone laugh than it is to make them smile. — Cath Crowley

It's funny the things you think you're scared of until they're upon you, and then you're not. — Gayle Forman

Funny the way it is, not right or wrong, somebody's heart is broken, and it becomes your favorite song. — Dave Matthews Band

Virtue is not solitary; it is bound to have neighbors — Confucius

I'm not on a diet. And it's funny cause people go 'Well, then why do you drink diet soda?' So I can eat regular cake. — Gabriel Iglesias

The biggest problem of all is that it's very difficult to tell my daughter, 'Swearing is not clever or funny,' because I earn a living by swearing. — Peter Capaldi

Does it hurt?"
He bent his head and lightly kissed her forehead. "Only when I laugh."
"I'll try not to be funny."
"Epic fail, beautiful. — Rachel Caine

Reading Alan Zweibel makes me laugh out loud. And yet it is not a particularly funny name. — Eric Idle

There's news that happens in different spheres and can be made just as funny, but it's not necessarily in the normal news medium. — Trevor Noah

America is still AmeriKKKa. rather we like it or not — Fee Scott

It was not so very long ago that people thought that semiconductors were part-time orchestra leaders and microchips were very small snack foods. — Geraldine Ferraro

If Damon Wayans is not breaking, it's a miracle. He is so funny that he makes everyone die laughing. — Casey Wilson

'Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home. 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?' 'It's not unusual.' — Tommy Cooper

I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways it will NOT work. — Thomas Edison

You know, albums are a funny thing. They're not like an intellectual decision. It's a collection of your kind of musings. — Glen Hansard

You're chained up." A wince pulled at Safi's eyes. "I upset the Admiral." "Of course you did." "It's not funny. — Susan Dennard

If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing. — Homer

Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally. — Rita Rudner

If you do a Western that's funny, there's no way people don't call it a spoof or a parody, even though it may not be. — Adam McKay

It's always funny watching something so beautiful not know how beautiful it really is. It's sad even. — Holly Hood

It's funny when people say you have sex appeal or call you the next Brad Pitt. I just laugh. I'm not that. I don't want to be that. — Kellan Lutz

Astrology is not an art, it is a disease. — Maimonides

Who would want him? he asks himself. Certainly not Ahana, who's funny, bright and so beautiful that it hurts. — Durjoy Datta

With improv, it's a combination of listening and not trying to be funny. — Kristen Wiig

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. — Mark Twain

It might be funny when you get hit by a car, but not when you get run over by one. — Rob Campbell

Humor is unavoidable. It might not feel funny in the moment, but more often than not there's a light at the end of the tunnel. — Ron Howard

If it bends, it's funny; if it breaks, it's not funny. — Kate O'Brien

I make love like farm equipment - not to farm equipment. There is a difference, though my cousin can't tell it. — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

We're just playing basketball. It's not like we're going out to have unprotected sex with Magic. — Charles Barkley

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it. — Dylan Moran

It's not fair! (Ryssa)
Because life was ever about fairness.
Oh, to be as naive as his sister. — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I don't pull out because ... it's not my problem. — Jim Norton

Most of the people I admire, they usually smell funny and don't get out much. It's true. Most of them are either dead or not feeling well. — Tom Waits

It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about being a girl, it's about being a funny comic. — Iliza Shlesinger

About mistakes it's funny. You got to make your own; and not only that, if you try to keep people from making theirs they get mad. — Edna Ferber

No, it's funny, when I eat out it's not typically in the kind of restaurants people might imagine. — Thomas Keller

I'm not a believer in the pratfall. I don't think it's funny just to have someone fall down. — Harold Ramis

I can eat you at breakfast, not because I am a monster; it is only because you are too cute and yummy. — M.F. Moonzajer

The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you. — Criss Jami

Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not a door? — Steven Wright

Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them. — P.G. Wodehouse

You must never imagine, that just because something is funny, it is not also dangerous. — Neil Gaiman

"And then we played Ping-Pong - "
"Not pool? I always assumed he was a billiards man - I mean, it's so handy the way he keeps a stick up his - — Claire LaZebnik

I personally do not find puke funny. I find it disgusting. — Lucy Punch

Like the NRA says, it's better to have a machine gun and not need it than to need a machine gun and not have it. — John Sandford

And a beautiful garden, not far from a beautiful lake, and I said it sounded perfectly perfect. — Vladimir Nabokov

There's something funny about being on a big stage and not making a big effort to fill it up — Jemaine Clement

It seemed that it was not only live magicians which Mr. Norrell despised. He had taken the measure of all the dead ones too and found them wanting. — Susanna Clarke

Sadness is like growing of hairs around our ass; we may not like it or want it, but it is surprisingly always there. — M.F. Moonzajer

If you have to release bad news to the public, it would help if you are not ugly. — Mitch Hedberg

It's not so much a thankless task, it's more a job with no thanks — Colin Baker

Often it's not we who shape words, but the words we use that shape us." "You're a funny bookseller, you — Nina George

Any misfortune that happens to another person is funny. If it happens to someone else and not me, it's very funny. — Gilbert Gottfried

The path may not be left for an instant. If it could be left, it would not be the path. — Confucius

It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on. — Marilyn Monroe

It's not common for a woman on television, especially if she's the mom of the family, to be funny. She's usually a straight man or foil. — Martha Plimpton

It's not called being gay, it's called being fabulous! — PewDiePie

You see, dear, it is not true that woman was made from man's rib; she was made from his funny bone. — James M. Barrie

I'm so unprofessional on set it's not even funny. — Katharine McPhee

The trick is always to write in pairs because if at least two people find it funny, you've immediately halved the odds of it not being funny. — Steve Coogan

Sex when you're married is like going to the 7-Eleven: There's not much variety, but at three in the morning, it's always there. — Carol Leifer

I love the world, just, you know ... not the people in it. — Hannah Vandegrift

I may not beleive in God, but I believe in guilt and no one wants to dick around with eternity, even if it isn't there. — Jonathan Tropper

Nirvana is very funny. It's not sincere particularly. It's rather frivolous, actually. — Frederick Lenz

It's not brain surgery. It's not nuclear physics. It's television. It's only television. — Linda Ellerbee

I don't know how high I went, I don't wanna know. Heights are not my favorite thing. It makes my balls go in my throat just thinking about it. — Chris Kyle

Funny how someone telling you not to do something can talk you into it. — Richelle Mead

Tradition or not, I sometimes thought putting children on an old guy's lap was already creepy enough. We didn't need to mix alcohol into it. — Richelle Mead

Yes, I believe blue material is funny, but if that's all you've got, you're dead in the water. It's not good. — Howard Stern

You named the chicken, Chicken?"
She looked embarrassed. "When we decided not to kill it, I got attached. — Tracey Garvis-Graves

It's funny how we like labels. If I ever have a bookstore, I'm not going to put any labels on the sections. — Audrey Niffenegger

I'm just not one of those naturally funny, relaxed actors who enjoy the spotlight and are so good at it. — Heath Ledger

Lovely, not only did the truck look like it was on its last leg, it was going to take the environment with it. — Adrienne Wilder

There's not much makeup in the army, is there? No. They only have that nighttime look, and that's a bit slapdash, isn't it? — Eddie Izzard

Eat your heart out. Oh, wait. You can't. It's not organic. — Susan Elizabeth Phillips

Too many writers get stuck in the trap of writing what they think is funny and not considering who they are writing it for. — Robin Thede

I'm a big fan of comedians not having to apologize for anything. Nowadays it seems comedians are always apologizing for being funny. — Kevin Dillon

Ish #1 It's not your mama's macaroni and cheese if you used spaghetti noodles. — Regina Griffin

I'm not against people just being funny or telling stories. I don't need to delve into the soft, dark core all the time. If it happens, it happens. — Marc Maron

I feel no grief for being called something
which
I am not;
in fact, it's enthralling, somehow, like a good
back rub — Charles Bukowski

Racism is not funny, because it won't solve anything, but making it worst instead, because racism is the reason the world is no longer great. — Werley Nortreus

I wrote my friend a letter using a highlighting pen. But he could not read it, he thought I was trying to show him certain parts of a piece of paper. — Mitch Hedberg

Shakespeare - it's not funny. No matter how they try to make Shakespeare funny, when it's meant to be funny it's not funny. — Julie Walters

If somebody tells me what to do, I will do my best not to do it. — Hiroko Sakai

What's wrong with her soul?"
"Nothing. She's just not actually in possession of it. — Rachel Vincent

It is funny how you do not miss affection until it is given, but once it is, it can never be enough; you would drown in it if possible. — Libba Bray

I don't think half my stuff would be funny if the audience didn't feel at least a little bit safe that it's not how I truly feel. — Sarah Silverman

It is meant to be survival of the fittest, not survival of the most floral. — Stephen Herfst

It's not funny. I've got a naked drunk vampire running around in my orchard. — Ilona Andrews

It's not hard to fail ... it's hard to accept you failed ... but once that's out of the way, it's pretty smooth sailing — Josh Stern

You know what love means? It means loving the person you are now and not the person you want someone to be or the person they will be. — Samantha Stroh Bailey

I'm alive," he groaned. "But I'm not doing a very good job of it. — Merrie Haskell

Climate change is like my head: it's not visible in every instance, but I'm pretty darn sure it's there. — Kevin Focke

I'm so into you, it's not even funny. (Naomi & Ely's No Kiss List) — Rachel Cohn

Don't make being a girl or a victim part of your stand-up act. If you encounter sexism in the business, don't bring it on stage; it's not funny. — Jen Kirkman

When I tell people I'm a comedian they say, 'Oh, are you funny?' I say, 'No, it's not that kind of comedy.' — Susan Sarandon

I've always wanted to have a suitcase handcuffed to my wrist. That's not a full joke there! It's filler. — Mitch Hedberg