Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes: top 30 famous quotes about Funny Soon To Be Married

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Soon To Be Married quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Henny Youngman: We were married for better or worse. I

We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse. — Henny Youngman

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Steven Wright: Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to

Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent? — Steven Wright

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Jim Norton: God, I hope he dies the night before

God, I hope he dies the night before one of his kids get married. — Jim Norton

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Elayne Boosler: I've never been married, but I tell people

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. — Elayne Boosler

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Oscar Wilde: Dammit Sir, it's your duty to get married.

Dammit Sir, it's your duty to get married. You can't always be living for pleasure! — Oscar Wilde

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By M. Kane: You think batting your lashes is going to

You think batting your lashes is going to get you out of this?"

"Of course not. You're a married man, detective. — M. Kane

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Michael W. Grimard: Oh the wonders of being married. Put a

Oh the wonders of being married. Put a gun in one hand and a woman in the other, I'm never sure who's going to kill me first. — Michael W. Grimard

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Gloria Steinem: Marriage works best for men than women. The

Marriage works best for men than women. The two happiest groups are married men and unmarried women. — Gloria Steinem

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Gilbert Gottfried: I've done a lot of Fox shows since

I've done a lot of Fox shows since then - Married with Children, Living Single and a whole bunch of other Fox things. — Gilbert Gottfried

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Wendy Liebman: I'm going to get married again because I'm

I'm going to get married again because I'm more mature now, and I need some kitchen stuff. — Wendy Liebman

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Ljupka Cvetanova: Opposities are married.

Opposities are married. — Ljupka Cvetanova

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Groucho Marx: I married your mother because I wanted children,

I married your mother because I wanted children, imagine my disappointment when you came along. — Groucho Marx

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Adam Ferrara: My girlfriend wants to get married. I tell

My girlfriend wants to get married. I tell you - I hope she meets somebody nice. — Adam Ferrara

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Joel Barnett, Baron Barnett: When we married, you measured 36-24-36. Now you're

When we married, you measured 36-24-36. Now you're 42-42-42. There's more of you, but you are not worth as much. — Joel Barnett, Baron Barnett

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Robyn Carr: Peyton, I'm not married and you're not a

Peyton, I'm not married and you're not a lesbian. Think of the possibilities. — Robyn Carr

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Regina King: It's funny that until I actually met my

It's funny that until I actually met my husband, I never thought I'd get married. — Regina King

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Henny Youngman: I've been married for 49 years. Where have

I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed? — Henny Youngman

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Robert Frost: It's a funny thing that when a man

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. — Robert Frost

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Freddie Mercury: No age is good to get married at.

No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married. — Freddie Mercury

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Jim Carrey: If we (Lauren and Jim) ever get married,

If we (Lauren and Jim) ever get married, we're just going to put helmets on, run into each other from a hundred yards, and smash together like rams — Jim Carrey

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Minnie Pearl: Getting married is a lot like getting into

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot. — Minnie Pearl

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Nigella Lawson: Also, in a funny way, if you have

Also, in a funny way, if you have been happily married there are no unresolved areas, nothing to prove to yourself after the other dies. — Nigella Lawson

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Jennifer Lopez: It's funny when you get married, you do

It's funny when you get married, you do find other couples to hang out with. — Jennifer Lopez

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Katey Sagal: 'Married with Children' was racy. It was sexist.

'Married with Children' was racy. It was sexist. It was a lot of things, but mostly it was funny. — Katey Sagal

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Carol Leifer: Sex when you're married is like going to

Sex when you're married is like going to the 7-Eleven: There's not much variety, but at three in the morning, it's always there. — Carol Leifer

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Kristen Schaal: Just because I'm married to Doug doesn't mean

Just because I'm married to Doug doesn't mean I can't be here for you. — Kristen Schaal

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By William Cosmo Monkhouse: There once was an old man of Lyme

There once was an old man of Lyme who married three wives at a time when asked, 'Why a third?' he replied 'One's absurd! and bigamy, sir, is a crime!' — William Cosmo Monkhouse

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Bob Hope: Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off,

Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off, and it was so successful she turned it into a series. — Bob Hope

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By Chelsea Handler: One of my girlfriends was getting married. This

One of my girlfriends was getting married. This was becoming an annoying pattern. — Chelsea Handler

Funny Soon To Be Married Quotes By David Coleman: And there's no "I love you" message because

And there's no "I love you" message because Steve Ovett has married the girl — David Coleman