Funny Person Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Funny Person
Funny Person Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Person quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
His chin looked as though a farsighted person had attempted to sew two thickly cut pieces of bacon together in a dark room.
— Christopher Paul Curtis
Remember, I'm the only person her who's paid to be nice to you. But not too nice. Give me any lip and I'll break your face. OK?
— Orson Scott Card
I was voted funniest person in my middle-school yearbook. So I guess I was funny in middle school?
— Cecily Strong
Ethical dilemmas have a way of sneaking up on a person. If something smells funny, stay away from it. Or help get rid of it.
— Price Pritchett
Always warm up the audience with a joke ... If you are not a particularly funny person, make sure that you inform them that it's a joke ...
— Jacob M. Appel
A skeptic is a person who, when he sees the handwriting on the wall, claims it is a forgery.
— Morris Bender
The only person I compete with is Satan. If that happens to be you, then could you please move out of the way? You're standing in Christ's spot.
— Shannon L. Alder
Finn gave a soft laugh. 'What's so funny?' 'I think you're the first person to actually apologise for inflicting pain. Usually it's someone's hobby.
— Tabitha McGowan
I am the shortest and least funny person in my family.
— Heather Donahue
I've been fighting to be who I am all my life. What's the point of being who I am, if I can't have the person who was worth all the fighting for?
— Stephanie Lennox
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him.
— Stanislaw Jerzy Lec
You know you're a hot mess when the only person buying you drinks all night is yourself.
— Chelsea Handler
He's the funniest, smartest person I know. It doesn't mean he doesn't bug me and I'm sure I bug him sometimes.
— Sarah Jessica Parker
It's funny because being comedic and happy and lighthearted is who I am as a person, so they're easier emotions for me to connect with.
— Lindsay Lohan
Haha, I can't hit you. If I did, I'd feel sorry for the person who'd have to clean up the mess of your splattered brain.
— Kyousuke Motomi
How are you gonna make an 'idol' from the type of person you're trying to avoid in real life?
— Natasha Leggero
You can't just explain a joke. Either it isn't funny, or the person just totally missed the punchline.
— Cass McCombs
The difference between you and the funny person on TV is that they acted on their ideas.
— Rob Manuel
Keep the other person's well being in mind when you feel an attack of soul-purging truth coming on.
— Betty White
It's funny how you can hear only a few cords from a song and it'll transport you back in time to a particular person or place.
— Janelle Smith Toussant
When a fat person goes in the water naked, would it still be called skinny-dipping?
— Anthony Liccione
One of the funny things about the stock market is that every time one person buys, another sells, and both think they are astute.
— William Feather
Why is it that it's okay to call a white person "mate" yet it's not okay to call a black guy "primate"?
— Frankie Boyle
There just is not one person in my family who is not funny.
— Michael Keaton
One person may look and only see a tree, whereas others may look and see a tree with leaves.
— Adrian Sandvaer
This isn't where I intended to be. Killing a person has a funny way of getting your life off-track.
— Erin Mitchell
Come on, if you don't win tonight it doesn't mean you're not a good person, it just means you're not a good actor.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I'm not a person who can spontaneously say funny things.
— Ashley Williams
The funny thing is that I write and I act a lot about being Jewish, but I don't really think about it as a regular person.
— Liev Schreiber
There is nothing funny about a well-adjusted, intelligent person making the right choices.
— Tim Heidecker
It's funny how seeing another person hurt can break you down faster than your own emotions -Audrey
— Suzanne Young
The last person they expected to connect with a screenplay was the comedic, blonde actress with the funny voice.
— Joey Lauren Adams
At this point I'm sure he's more plastic than person, but most people who hate wrinkles become Daleks over time, anyway.
— Ashley Poston
It is easy to smile at an insult and pretend it's funny when the person insulting you is hosing you with money.
— Al Alvarez
I have always been told that I was a funny, entertaining person and have always been told to give comedy a try.
— Gabriel Iglesias
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist?
— Steven Wright
That was a funny thing about friends, Marylin thought. You could know a person practically your whole life and she could still surprise you.
— Frances O'Roark Dowell
I love you because you loved me first. Yet you love me, saying I loved you first. Funny, our love thrives believing the other person started it.
— Richelle E. Goodrich
A comedian is not a person who opens a funny door - he's the person who opens a door funny.
— Chuck Jones
I never thought of myself as like, a funny person.
— Lena Dunham
The only person who worries about my mother is God, and that's only because she wants His job.
— Sue Civil-Brown
Because friendship is about laughing when the other person is joking to make you feel better. Even if you don't find her joke all that funny.
— Padma Venkatraman
I just don't know what I'd do without a brain, Simone!" I say. "I mean, what's a person without one?
— Randa Abdel-Fattah
You know what love means? It means loving the person you are now and not the person you want someone to be or the person they will be.
— Samantha Stroh Bailey
It's funny how aimless a person can feel at times, even when they know God is in control.
— Chris Fabry
You aren't a morning person, are you?" he mused."No, I'm not. There is a reason mornin' and mournin' sound the same. — L.A. Casey
It's funny how you can know a person, think of him as your closest friend, and still never gain access to the secret chambers in his heart.
— Jennifer Finney Boylan
It would be a really bad idea to let this person loose.""How bad of an idea?"
"Kicking-Hitler-out-of-art-school bad. — Rin Chupeco
When you argue with someone, you always argue at the level of the person with the lowest level of intelligence. You never argue up.
— Spuds Crawford
Love is a funny thing. It can make you the happiest person in the world when it's good, but when it goes bad, it can crush you beyond recognition.
— Courtney Giardina
Optimism isn't funny unless you are laughing at the person, whereas extreme pessimism is extremely funny. It's exaggeration.
— Steve Toltz
I'm not ashamed of being a bubbly, funny person. I think that's as valid as being the dark, brooding, tortured Oscar-nominated one.
— Cameron Diaz
When asked "If you could meet any famous person living or dead," I always ask whether the dead person would be alive again when I meet them.
— Ashish Chauhan
Sometimes charm can make a person blind to truth ... look at Ted Bundy.
— Shelley K. Wall
I've got a hockey record, I took off my skate and tried to stab a guy, I'm the only person who ever tried that.
— Adam Sandler
I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen.
— George Carlin
I actually was class clown, but I don't know how that happened because I've never been considered an outwardly funny person.
— Janeane Garofalo
A person doesn't know how much he has to be thankful for until he has to pay taxes on it.
— Ann Landers
Has anybody ever told you you're a remarkably cynical person?""I like to think of it as learning from experience. — Benedict Jacka
Our love was a two-person game. At least until one of us died, and the other became a murderer.
— Dark Jar Tin Zoo
Apparently when it's two people, it's quirky and funny, but when it's a person doing the same stuff on her own, it's rebellious and antisocial.
— Katie Alender
It's rude to stare, but the great thing about staring at a sedated person is that they don't know you're doing it.
— Maggie Stiefvater
