Amy Schumer Quotes

Collection of top 58 famous quotes about Amy Schumer

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Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I want to keep working really hard at I want to keep working really hard at getting better at stand-up and touring, and I can't imagine a time when I won't want to do that. But, who knows? — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: First of all, nobody can be innocent and First of all, nobody can be innocent and wise at the same time. That's another one of those impossible combinations. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: We had to break up, though. We wanted We had to break up, though. We wanted different things - like he wanted kids and I wanted him to hear. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I donated blood today. That's what I call I donated blood today. That's what I call getting an AIDS test. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I asked for a glass of Chardonnay. And I asked for a glass of Chardonnay. And in a 9/11-like twist, they didn't have any. They offered me Pinot. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I only met Joan Rivers once. But when I only met Joan Rivers once. But when she passed away, it felt like a part of me went away, too. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: It's hard out there for a fuzzy little It's hard out there for a fuzzy little introvert. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: tactics for negotiating with adults. I came on tactics for negotiating with adults. I came on pretty strong at my friends' houses because — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I'm not extra sensitive to handshakes. I shake I'm not extra sensitive to handshakes. I shake hands all the time. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: It was the best night of my life, It was the best night of my life, getting to dance on stage with Madonna! — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I've got a terrible person in me just I've got a terrible person in me just as much as anybody else, and I think - I like to think I also have a really good person in me. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: The saddest realization I've had in my life The saddest realization I've had in my life is that my parents are people. Sad, human people. I aged a decade in that moment. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I am not who I sleep with. I I am not who I sleep with. I am not my weight. I am not my mother. I am myself. And I am all of you, and I thank you. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I hope that the next time you go I hope that the next time you go to a concert, the band doesn't play the song you wanna hear! And instead, they just play songs off their new album! — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: The last couple of roles I missed out The last couple of roles I missed out on went to Jennifer Hudson, Jessica Biel and Olivia Wilde. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: The moments that make life worth living are The moments that make life worth living are when things are at their worst and you find a way to laugh. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: Want me to Stevie Wonder my way to Want me to Stevie Wonder my way to the bathroom? — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I'm still proud of a lot of my I'm still proud of a lot of my jokes when I started. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I am a hot-blooded fire and I am I am a hot-blooded fire and I am fearless. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I tend to eat pretty healthy, though, and I tend to eat pretty healthy, though, and I work out - I work out hard. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I like to create stuff. I like to I like to create stuff. I like to express myself through jokes. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: The way that these girls keep themselves skinny The way that these girls keep themselves skinny is awful, isn't it? By vomiting or using hard drugs - which I can't afford. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: It's a weird age. They're like, 'Amy, I'm It's a weird age. They're like, 'Amy, I'm pregnant.' And I still don't know whether to be like, 'Congratulations,' or 'Do you need a ride? — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: You know that show 'Teen Mom'? Or if You know that show 'Teen Mom'? Or if you're from the South, 'Mom. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I feel very open with people, and I'm I feel very open with people, and I'm good at disarming them and having conversations. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: I feel very comfortable in my own skin. I feel very comfortable in my own skin. When someone makes jokes about me being heavy, it makes me mad. It's not true. I'm right where I should be. — Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes By Amy Schumer: Seeing the people I love happy. 4. Seeing the people I love happy. 4. — Amy Schumer