Norman Wisdom Quotes

I've been extremely lucky having been in the army when I was a boy of fourteen.

My only phobia is untidiness. My hair has to be neatly kept; my shoes are always clean. Everything has to be in a straight line, in its place.

When you're as famous as I am, stories take on a life of their own.

I can never tell a joke, I've always found it easier to just fall over.

I like consistency. If you've had a childhood like mine, you want some things you can rely on to stay the same.

But no, I've just been very lucky. But I've worked hard, and the harder you work, the luckier you seem to get.

I must admit I like to muck around a bit; I always have.

At my age, the radiation will probably do me good.

I've done seven shows at the Palladium - long running shows I'm talking about.

I've got one idea I want to do for a film and you know I just enjoy myself doing bits and pieces.

What I like doing most is making children laugh.

I don't know nothing about communism. But I know the Albanians loved me. Same reason as anyone else loves me. Because I made them laugh.

My father used to be away for months at a time, and he'd never leave any money for food, so my brother and I had to go out and nick it.

I believe in physical comedy, because that reaches out most to people.

I have a folder where I keep all the articles the critics have written about me. It makes me feel good.

You see I'm semi-retired now and don't work all the time, only most of it!

I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry.

There are people who like just ordinary comedy fun, and making mistakes - which I do easily - and then there are people who like the falling over.

My comedy is for children from three to 93. You do need a slightly childish sense of humour and if you haven't got that, it's very sad.

I used to first go on to entertain an audience. But now I go, and this is really true - I go on to have fun with a crowd of my chums.

Most of my comedies were low on budgets - certainly by American standards.

I've been making people laugh for 40 years, so I know how important it is!

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.

It was absolutely thrilling to meet Laurel and Hardy, they were so nice.

I do play drums when I'm on tour.

I was born in London, and went to school in Scotland - I used to be dead tired when I got home at night.

I play drums, clarinet, saxophone, trumpet, french horn, piano.

I owe everything to the army.

All my boyhood, all I ever wanted was to be loved.

Don't get me wrong: I'm overjoyed with my career to date. But perhaps I could have done more. Mostly, I just did whatever the directors told me to do.

Of course I've done musicals here in London.

I'm still constantly thinking of ideas. I don't feel 90. I think I'm about 12.

Such is life and life is such and after all it isn't much. First a cradle. Then a hearse. It might have been better, but it could have been worse.

I've always had a sense of humour, and I still do, so I just want to go on performing as long as I can. It's as simple as that.

It was smashing working with Jerry Desmonde, he was a very nice chap.

I was in the band as a boy and was taught music and learned to compose.