Kurt Vonnegut Jr. quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

Kurt Vonnegut Jr. Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Kurt Vonnegut Jr. on Wise Famous Quotes.

The men wore loose loincloths that did little to conceal penes like pendulums on grandfather clocks. There

No," said Trout, "for delighting Jesus Christ by shooting dead a doctor coming to work in an
abortion mill.

The horse jumped over the fucking fence.

They were grainy things, soot and chalk. They could have been anybody.

america...is the interplay of three hundred million rube goldberg contraptions invented only yesterday

Nice, nice, very nice.

How embarrassing it is to be human.

Tiger got to hunt

No damn cat, and no damn cradle.

Money is dehydrated utopia.

To be dead and to eat at the same time.

A dinosaur was a reptile

I could carve a better man out of a banana.

The hinged clogs were transforming his feet into blood puddings.

Pay no attention when I laugh," I begged him. "I'm a notorious pervert in that respect.

No trouble. There really isn't a heck of a lot to the job.

only nutcases want to be president.

What kind of an animal would do such a thing? The old me, I think. ***

Don't truth me, [...] and I won't truth you.

To be or not to be" was the telephone number of the municipal gas chambers of the Federal Bureau of Termination.

To all my friends and enemies in the buckeye state. Come on over. There's room for everybody in Shangri-La.

Love may fail, but courtesy will prevail.

Give me knowledge or give me death.

... lovemaking, if sincere, is one of the best ideas Satan put in the apple she gave to the serpent to give to Eve.

Billy was unconscious for two days after that, and he dreamed millions of things, some of them true. The true things were time-travel.

People aren't supposed to look back.

This is Kurt Vonnegut in the effing state-of-the-art lethal injection facility in Huntsville, effing, Texas signing off.

I thought, the kindest and funniest ones, the ones who hated war the most, were the ones who'd really fought. I

I do realize that I am a very slow realizer.

This wearied me, but then, almost everything about the modern world wearies me. I

We could have saved it, but we were too doggone cheap.

Enjoy the little things in life because one day you'll look back and realize they were the big things.

I was thrilled, heartbroken, hilarious, insane.

You can ask, but you surely know I won't tell you

For having the courage to tell the truth during the war when everybody else was telling lies

This is my first visit." "It's

The phrase reeked of cannibalism.

There was more. There was always more.

Everybody on earth was a robot, with one exception - Dwayne Hoover.

And so it goes...

sinookas, the tendrils of my life,

His fingers made the string figure called a 'cat's cradle.

It snapped in juicy protest.

My name is Yon Yonson,
I work in Wisconsin

Busy, busy, busy.

I'm in the middle of a sentence," I said. "Who isn't?" she

That you admire pure hearts and heroes, that you love good and evil, and that you believe in romance.

The function of art is to make people like life more than they do.

You're not a bad sort, you know, " he said, "particularly when you forget who you are.

Everybody should be buried with somebody else, just about anybody else, whenever feasible.

Lonesome, no more!

The arts..are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow.

If God were alive today, He'd be an atheist.

Don't kiss me now - here comes somebody.

That's a fugging shame,

All men are jerks, all women are psychotic.

Science is magic that works.

Just because something can reproduce, that doesn't mean it should reproduce.

It's embarrassing to be human.

Whenever I ask a question, and the pain comes, I know I have asked a really good question.

Why me?" he asked the guard. The guard shoved him back into ranks. "Vy you? Vy anybody?" he said.

Farewell, hello, farewell, hello.

Everything that ever was always will be, and everything that ever will be always was.

You are entitled to wonder. I'm not.

A woman's not a woman till the pills wear off.

God never wrote a good play in his life.

The question is, rather, whether or not America is to enter a new and distressing phase of history where men no longer pursue happiness but buy it.

Nowhere has the number zero been more of philosophical value

Whoever it was - he was one of the most vicious sons of bitches who ever lived.

Nothing in this book is true.

Everything is nothing, with a twist.

End of the world delight

Billy Pilgrim tried hard to care.

I can have oodles of charm when I want to.

There is room enough for an awful lot of people to be right about things and still not agree. The

For reasons obvious to us all, this galaxy is dissolved!

The cattle are lowing
The baby awakes
But the little Lord Jesus
No crying He makes

You can learn all kinds of habits quickly under martial law. The

God damn it, you've got to be kind.

Goodbye blue Monday.

How did I get so old?

You want to know why I don't have AIDS, why I'm not HIV-positive like so many other people? I don't fuck around. It's as simple as that. Trout

People are unkind sometimes without meaning to be.

The fact that human beings are now the only animals left on Earth, I confess, seems a confusing sort of victory.

I was about to be attacked by a Doberman pinscher. He was a leading character in an earlier version of this book. ***

Billy Pilgrim, there in the creekbed, thought he, Billy Pilgrim, was turning to steam painlessly.

If you can do no good, at least do no harm.

All this happened, more or less.

And I became a non-person in the Boston fog, and Lufthansa put me in a limousine with other non-persons and sent us to a motel for a non-night.

I'm not the Ambassador," said Crosby. "I wish I was, but I'm just a plain, ordinary business man.

TV is an eraser.

Here is a crazy thing we could actually do, probably, but we would never do it, of course. It's just fun to think about.

Western Civilization rests on great men, and nothing else. And we are no longer producing great men.

stationery of Magnum Opus,

Money can be a great comfort sometimes.

I thought the worst of everyone.

Little Newt snorted. "Religion!"
"Beg your pardon?" Castle said.
"See the cat?" asked Newt. "See the cradle?

I am a brother to writers everywhere.

Dammit, you've got to be kind.

in nonsense is strength