Ken Dodd quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Ken Dodd

Ken Dodd Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Ken Dodd on Wise Famous Quotes.

Ken Dodd quotes: I told the Inland Revenue I didn't owe them a penny because I lived near the seaside.

I told the Inland Revenue I didn't owe them a penny because I lived near the seaside.

Ken Dodd quotes: If I get a hard audience they are not going to get away until they laugh. Those seven laughs a minute - I've got to have them.

If I get a hard audience they are not going to get away until they laugh. Those seven laughs a minute - I've got to have them.

Ken Dodd quotes: The trouble with Freud is that he never played the Glasgow Empire Saturday night.

The trouble with Freud is that he never played the Glasgow Empire Saturday night.

Ken Dodd quotes: I have kleptomania. But when it gets bad, I take something for it.

I have kleptomania. But when it gets bad, I take something for it.

Ken Dodd quotes: Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.

Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.

Ken Dodd quotes: I haven't spoken to my mother-in-law for eighteen months-I don't like to interrupt her.

I haven't spoken to my mother-in-law for eighteen months-I don't like to interrupt her.

Ken Dodd quotes: Men's legs have a terribly lonely life - standing in the dark in your trousers all day.

Men's legs have a terribly lonely life - standing in the dark in your trousers all day.

Ken Dodd quotes: My act is very educational. I heard a man leaving the other night saying, 'Well that taught me a lesson.'

My act is very educational. I heard a man leaving the other night saying, 'Well that taught me a lesson.'

Ken Dodd quotes: Television is like a great monster, eating your gags as fast as you say them.

Television is like a great monster, eating your gags as fast as you say them.

Ken Dodd quotes: Did you know that a laugh is something that comes out of a hole in your face? Anywhere else and you're in dead trouble!

Did you know that a laugh is something that comes out of a hole in your face? Anywhere else and you're in dead trouble!

Ken Dodd quotes: My teeth are all my own. I've just finished paying for them.

My teeth are all my own. I've just finished paying for them.