J. B. Smoove Quotes
Top 57 wise famous quotes and sayings by J. B. Smoove
J. B. Smoove Famous Quotes & Sayings
Discover top inspirational quotes from J. B. Smoove on Wise Famous Quotes.
You ever taste some damn chicken so horrible, that you wished the chicken would show up at your house and show your lady how to cook him?
That's what I am; I'm a drip. You still get hydrated, you still get your nutrients, just a little at a damn time.
Sometimes you got to put somebody in their place, let them know that you mean business and you're a grown ass man.
My wife is a vegetarian. When my wife is with me, I eat vegetarian. When she's not, I eat meat. I'm just being honest.
I try to dress smooth, I try to keep my face shaved, I try to keep my head cut. I try to do all the things to keep it smooth going!
I'm trying to be the Jay-Z of comedy one day. I don't know if there's any comedy moguls out there, but I would love to be the first comedy mogul.
I am addicted to hockey now. I've seen it on TV, but to be there? I had no idea that white people were having so much fun without me.
I did a club one night - the speakers were old as hell. My jokes were coming out in black and white.
You know what I like? I like classic stuff. I like 'The Andy Griffith Show' - the variety of characters was so amazing to me.
I believe, even when I'm doing my standup or my acting or whatever I'm doing, I believe in painting pictures.
For me, standup will always be some part of my life, and other things will move around and find their place.
At the top of this list has to be "get in that ass". It's the ultimate Leonism to get you through life.
Live TV has an amazing pace to it. You've got to be able to think quick, make changes last minute, and be funny and fast.
I may even show up behind the camera. I love to put things together; I love to give direction. I have a great eye for pace.
Just broke up with somebody. Well, it wasn't really a break up, it was a booty call I might have took too serious.
Before I got into stand-up, I used to be a hip-hop dancer in a crew, and my name was J. Smoove, and my partner was J. Groove.
I steal scenes, I steal opportunities. I am the ultimate thief. I got sticky fingers, man. They all call me The Thief.
Remember Tupperware? That was the toughest stuff ever. Why can't they make a phone out of Tupperware?