Gabriel Iglesias quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Gabriel Iglesias

Gabriel Iglesias Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Gabriel Iglesias on Wise Famous Quotes.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: If I'm drinking I can either be the nicest guy ever or I'm the guy you should leave alone.

If I'm drinking I can either be the nicest guy ever or I'm the guy you should leave alone.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm not on a diet. And it's funny cause people go 'Well, then why do you drink diet soda?' So I can eat regular cake.

I'm not on a diet. And it's funny cause people go 'Well, then why do you drink diet soda?' So I can eat regular cake.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: When you leave, you basically want to go eat, because I talk a lot about food in my act. So when you leave, you leave hungry.

When you leave, you basically want to go eat, because I talk a lot about food in my act. So when you leave, you leave hungry.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I have very nice cars. I never get to drive them, because I'm never home.

I have very nice cars. I never get to drive them, because I'm never home.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Some people can handle alcohol. You know who you are. Some people can't handle alcohol. The police know who you are.

Some people can handle alcohol. You know who you are. Some people can't handle alcohol. The police know who you are.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I want to be known as a funny comic not just a funny Latino comic. I want to be able to go everywhere and anywhere.

I want to be known as a funny comic not just a funny Latino comic. I want to be able to go everywhere and anywhere.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: My favorite people to have fun with are police officers 'cause they're so serious, you know.

My favorite people to have fun with are police officers 'cause they're so serious, you know.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: With all the classes they offer at school, how come they don't have one for common sense?

With all the classes they offer at school, how come they don't have one for common sense?

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: You live by the cake, you die by the cake.

You live by the cake, you die by the cake.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I have always been told that I was a funny, entertaining person and have always been told to give comedy a try.

I have always been told that I was a funny, entertaining person and have always been told to give comedy a try.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I never go perform somewhere alone. I've done that since day one. I've always taken other comics with me.

I never go perform somewhere alone. I've done that since day one. I've always taken other comics with me.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: When you go to Hawaii, it's all about "Aloha." It means hello, goodbye and I love you.

When you go to Hawaii, it's all about "Aloha." It means hello, goodbye and I love you.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: When you're a comedian, the Holy Grail is an hour long HBO special.

When you're a comedian, the Holy Grail is an hour long HBO special.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Early on when I started talking about my weight, it was self-deprecating; everything was a joke.

Early on when I started talking about my weight, it was self-deprecating; everything was a joke.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I try not to get political, I don't want to get religious, I don't want to get controversial, I just want to have a show that relates to everybody.

I try not to get political, I don't want to get religious, I don't want to get controversial, I just want to have a show that relates to everybody.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Why do people measure life by the years instead of how good the years were?

Why do people measure life by the years instead of how good the years were?

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'll walk up to a woman, I'll say the first thing that comes to mind: 'Hey, you hungry?'

I'll walk up to a woman, I'll say the first thing that comes to mind: 'Hey, you hungry?'

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Make sure you're doing impressions of people that are still relevant, and that everyone knows. Red Skelton impressions are a little outdated.

Make sure you're doing impressions of people that are still relevant, and that everyone knows. Red Skelton impressions are a little outdated.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: People think if you have money, it'll fix the problems, but it creates different ones.

People think if you have money, it'll fix the problems, but it creates different ones.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Anything is possible as long as you're focused, determined and you really want to do it.

Anything is possible as long as you're focused, determined and you really want to do it.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I usually travel with a posse. I roll deep. I travel like a rapper, but without the artillery. We don't carry guns, we carry cookies.

I usually travel with a posse. I roll deep. I travel like a rapper, but without the artillery. We don't carry guns, we carry cookies.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Me racist? The only race I hate is the one you have to run.

Me racist? The only race I hate is the one you have to run.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: As far as guys who perform onstage, I love Chris Rock. I'm kind of jaded on everyone else.

As far as guys who perform onstage, I love Chris Rock. I'm kind of jaded on everyone else.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I eat a lot of junk food, because that's what's usually available at 1:00am when I'm all done working.

I eat a lot of junk food, because that's what's usually available at 1:00am when I'm all done working.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I found that laughter was a form of acceptance, and I really enjoyed that and I just - I crave it.

I found that laughter was a form of acceptance, and I really enjoyed that and I just - I crave it.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm always ready for TV. I don't have to edit my jokes - when you work clean, you can work anywhere.

I'm always ready for TV. I don't have to edit my jokes - when you work clean, you can work anywhere.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: You wonder why I only talk about my personal life. But that's all I've ever done.

You wonder why I only talk about my personal life. But that's all I've ever done.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: When I go to dance clubs, I always dance with big girls, so we finish at the same time.

When I go to dance clubs, I always dance with big girls, so we finish at the same time.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.

I'm a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: There's 5 levels of fatness! Fluffy is one of the levels. There's big, healthy, husky, fluffy and damn.

There's 5 levels of fatness! Fluffy is one of the levels. There's big, healthy, husky, fluffy and damn.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I wanted to be a comedian, and this is what I'm doing. If I can keep this going, I'm happy.

I wanted to be a comedian, and this is what I'm doing. If I can keep this going, I'm happy.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I don't want to die tomorrow knowing I could've had a piece of cake tonight.

I don't want to die tomorrow knowing I could've had a piece of cake tonight.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: When I first got to St. Louis, I saw the arch and I said, 'I want to go to that McDonalds.

When I first got to St. Louis, I saw the arch and I said, 'I want to go to that McDonalds.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Life is measured by how you lived it, not by the years.

Life is measured by how you lived it, not by the years.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I got off the plane - I was walking and cooking at the same time.

I got off the plane - I was walking and cooking at the same time.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I had to travel half way across the world to be called an American.

I had to travel half way across the world to be called an American.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I learned early on, stay away from politics, stay away from religion and don't talk about sports. Those three right there will get you in trouble.

I learned early on, stay away from politics, stay away from religion and don't talk about sports. Those three right there will get you in trouble.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Comedians do movies and TV so that when they tour, they sell out. That's the goal: To get popular enough so the place is packed.

Comedians do movies and TV so that when they tour, they sell out. That's the goal: To get popular enough so the place is packed.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: When I was a kid I did impressions and funny voices a lot. When I was telling a story I would use the voices to make it more entertaining.

When I was a kid I did impressions and funny voices a lot. When I was telling a story I would use the voices to make it more entertaining.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I want to get so famous that I don't have to wake up in the morning. It'll probably never happen.

I want to get so famous that I don't have to wake up in the morning. It'll probably never happen.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I almost bought a DeLorean the other day just because. If I see something that I think is cool and I like it, I'll go for it.

I almost bought a DeLorean the other day just because. If I see something that I think is cool and I like it, I'll go for it.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I know enough football to know that's funny!

I know enough football to know that's funny!

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I drink diet coke so I can eat regular cake.

I drink diet coke so I can eat regular cake.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Comedy is my passion. I'm going to do this until I drop.

Comedy is my passion. I'm going to do this until I drop.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: If you Google the word "fluffy," I'm the first thing that pops up. It's me, dogs and rabbits.

If you Google the word "fluffy," I'm the first thing that pops up. It's me, dogs and rabbits.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Drinking can bring out a dude that has some issues.

Drinking can bring out a dude that has some issues.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Kids, man, they're way too honest. They're like mini-alcoholics.

Kids, man, they're way too honest. They're like mini-alcoholics.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I see a lot of nice hotels, but I never really get to enjoy the cities, because I have to be on a plane the next day.

I see a lot of nice hotels, but I never really get to enjoy the cities, because I have to be on a plane the next day.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: You know what I learned about Hawaiians? They're just blown up Mexicans!

You know what I learned about Hawaiians? They're just blown up Mexicans!

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm a comedian who happens to be Latino. What's the difference? The difference is, my special will air on Comedy Central, not Telemundo.

I'm a comedian who happens to be Latino. What's the difference? The difference is, my special will air on Comedy Central, not Telemundo.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Hanging out with comics, all they did was make fun of me.

Hanging out with comics, all they did was make fun of me.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: It's because you alienate half the room talking about sports. Half the crowd will be against you no matter what you say.

It's because you alienate half the room talking about sports. Half the crowd will be against you no matter what you say.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Believe it or not, I've got a really bad metabolism. One burger and I'm done. I'm not a guy that puts away 10 burgers.

Believe it or not, I've got a really bad metabolism. One burger and I'm done. I'm not a guy that puts away 10 burgers.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm not fat. I'm fluffy!

I'm not fat. I'm fluffy!

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I don't even have a clue as to where to find a pregnancy test. I'm looking at all the aisles ... they don't have one that says 'oops.

I don't even have a clue as to where to find a pregnancy test. I'm looking at all the aisles ... they don't have one that says 'oops.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: Home in bed listening to the rain getting ready to order a pizza. Sounds like a song til the last part.

Home in bed listening to the rain getting ready to order a pizza. Sounds like a song til the last part.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: You gotta live life before you can talk about it. Sometimes when things don't work out in life, they work out on stage.

You gotta live life before you can talk about it. Sometimes when things don't work out in life, they work out on stage.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm always very happy to talk to people. I relate to people, and the guy on stage is very much the guy that's off stage. People know when it's fake.

I'm always very happy to talk to people. I relate to people, and the guy on stage is very much the guy that's off stage. People know when it's fake.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm a big guy, but I'm really simple with the food. I'll hit the In-N-Out or just the regular buffets.

I'm a big guy, but I'm really simple with the food. I'll hit the In-N-Out or just the regular buffets.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I see a Latino comic as someone who can only perform for Latino audiences. I cross the board.

I see a Latino comic as someone who can only perform for Latino audiences. I cross the board.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: We can choose our family. We can't choose our relatives.

We can choose our family. We can't choose our relatives.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I love Australia. First of all, everyone is so nice. The people are down to Earth, and they like having fun with you.

I love Australia. First of all, everyone is so nice. The people are down to Earth, and they like having fun with you.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: You can't be bad ass in a car that kills gas like I kill tacos.

You can't be bad ass in a car that kills gas like I kill tacos.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I was not the popular kid in school.

I was not the popular kid in school.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: The only way I will do a sitcom is if it's hurled at me, and I don't have to work for it.

The only way I will do a sitcom is if it's hurled at me, and I don't have to work for it.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I was very dirty; I was a very dirty comic. There was no way I would have gotten on TV with the act I had when I first started.

I was very dirty; I was a very dirty comic. There was no way I would have gotten on TV with the act I had when I first started.

Gabriel Iglesias quotes: I'm not fat. It's just my awesomeness swelling up inside of me.

I'm not fat. It's just my awesomeness swelling up inside of me.