David Wong quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by David Wong

David Wong Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from David Wong on Wise Famous Quotes.

David Wong quotes: You're the kind of man a man wants when a man wants a man.

You're the kind of man a man wants when a man wants a man.

David Wong quotes: Son, the greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world there was only one of him. I

Son, the greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world there was only one of him. I

David Wong quotes: John. I would ask you what you are doing, but I fear you would actually tell me.

John. I would ask you what you are doing, but I fear you would actually tell me.

David Wong quotes: You see, Frank found out the hard way that the dark things lurking in the night don't haunt old houses or abandoned ships. They haunt minds.

You see, Frank found out the hard way that the dark things lurking in the night don't haunt old houses or abandoned ships. They haunt minds.

David Wong quotes: Amy put her hand on mine, her other hand balled up in a fist on the table.

Amy put her hand on mine, her other hand balled up in a fist on the table.

David Wong quotes: The horizon was shitting a sun, casting a glow on a layer of fog that was settling in the low areas like puddles of ghost piss.

The horizon was shitting a sun, casting a glow on a layer of fog that was settling in the low areas like puddles of ghost piss.

David Wong quotes: Zoey didn't want to be paranoid, but there was something about the man in the loincloth made of charred doll heads that made her nervous.

Zoey didn't want to be paranoid, but there was something about the man in the loincloth made of charred doll heads that made her nervous.

David Wong quotes: I heard a screeching like steam from a teapot, and realized it was me.

I heard a screeching like steam from a teapot, and realized it was me.

David Wong quotes: You know, I observed a man who masturbated until he bled. Did he want to do that?

You know, I observed a man who masturbated until he bled. Did he want to do that?

David Wong quotes: That's what it's like being poor - choices are something you sit around and dream about having, some day after you strike it rich.

That's what it's like being poor - choices are something you sit around and dream about having, some day after you strike it rich.

David Wong quotes: English should have a word for that feeling you get when you first wake up in a strange room and have no freaking idea where you are.Hotezzlement?

English should have a word for that feeling you get when you first wake up in a strange room and have no freaking idea where you are.
Hotezzlement?

David Wong quotes: Do they know they make the honey for you? Or do they work tirelessly because they think its their own choice?

Do they know they make the honey for you? Or do they work tirelessly because they think its their own choice?

David Wong quotes: When a man plans, a woman laughs.

When a man plans, a woman laughs.

David Wong quotes: Children die every day because millions of us tell ourselves that caring is just as good as doing.

Children die every day because millions of us tell ourselves that caring is just as good as doing.

David Wong quotes: The heavy monkey of sleep rested its warm, furry ass on my eyelids.

The heavy monkey of sleep rested its warm, furry ass on my eyelids.

David Wong quotes: the jet stream undulating over us like an angry snake god.

the jet stream undulating over us like an angry snake god.

David Wong quotes: What do normal people do when they're together?

What do normal people do when they're together?

David Wong quotes: THE END IS NOT NEARIT HAS ALREADY HAPPENEDWE JUST DIDN'T CARE

THE END IS NOT NEAR
IT HAS ALREADY HAPPENED
WE JUST DIDN'T CARE

David Wong quotes: A cockroach has no soul. Yet it runs and eats and shits and fucks and breeds. It has no soul, yet it lives a full life. Just like you.

A cockroach has no soul. Yet it runs and eats and shits and fucks and breeds. It has no soul, yet it lives a full life. Just like you.

David Wong quotes: Of all the dogs I've known in my life, I've never seen a better driver.

Of all the dogs I've known in my life, I've never seen a better driver.

David Wong quotes: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked "That if Franz Kafka were here his head would explode?""Actually, yeah.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked "That if Franz Kafka were here his head would explode?"
"Actually, yeah.

David Wong quotes: Folding chairs were flying through the air as if propelled by dozens of invisible Bobby Knights.

Folding chairs were flying through the air as if propelled by dozens of invisible Bobby Knights.

David Wong quotes: The floor was littered with paper cups and candy wrappers and cigarette butts and other teenager droppings. I saw a used condom under my shoe.

The floor was littered with paper cups and candy wrappers and cigarette butts and other teenager droppings. I saw a used condom under my shoe.

David Wong quotes: We don't feel like that's a good faith offer, because it seems more like you're just trying to save money on cockroaches.

We don't feel like that's a good faith offer, because it seems more like you're just trying to save money on cockroaches.

David Wong quotes: A ghost sighting is usually nothing more than your brain trying to put a familiar face on something that does not have a face at all.

A ghost sighting is usually nothing more than your brain trying to put a familiar face on something that does not have a face at all.

David Wong quotes: A clean conscience is expensive, it's the reason most men have to live paycheck to paycheck.

A clean conscience is expensive, it's the reason most men have to live paycheck to paycheck.

David Wong quotes: She burst into snakes.

She burst into snakes.

David Wong quotes: It was the pink elephant in the room, the thunderous fart in the elevator.

It was the pink elephant in the room, the thunderous fart in the elevator.

David Wong quotes: Nobody involved in a conflict thinks they're the villain.

Nobody involved in a conflict thinks they're the villain.

David Wong quotes: Kittens will make your sad go away

Kittens will make your sad go away

David Wong quotes: Son, the greatest trick the Devil pulled was convincing the world there was only one of him.

Son, the greatest trick the Devil pulled was convincing the world there was only one of him.

David Wong quotes: Around us, the disembodied human limbs were piling up, forming a circle around the fountain, fusing themselves to each other like Satan's LEGO set.

Around us, the disembodied human limbs were piling up, forming a circle around the fountain, fusing themselves to each other like Satan's LEGO set.

David Wong quotes: That's what life is. Adjustment.

That's what life is. Adjustment.

David Wong quotes: Arnie sighed and for a quick moment looked genuinely sympathetic that someone could dream up something this elaborately sad.

Arnie sighed and for a quick moment looked genuinely sympathetic that someone could dream up something this elaborately sad.

David Wong quotes: Cynicism does not cause inaction..

Cynicism does not cause inaction..

David Wong quotes: And, well, that's my story," I said. "I'm sorry that it's so, you know. Retarded.

And, well, that's my story," I said. "I'm sorry that it's so, you know. Retarded.

David Wong quotes: Okay, there is no possible combination of English words that would form a dumber plan than that.

Okay, there is no possible combination of English words that would form a dumber plan than that.

David Wong quotes: No. We talked about this. I'm going home to eat a pie.

No. We talked about this. I'm going home to eat a pie.

David Wong quotes: The kittens will make your sad go away." The

The kittens will make your sad go away." The

David Wong quotes: But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.

But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.

David Wong quotes: ... all the king's doctors and all the king's pills couldn't make Frank's waking nightmares go away.

... all the king's doctors and all the king's pills couldn't make Frank's waking nightmares go away.

David Wong quotes: I am not the star of a zombie movie. I am the guy in the background who gets eaten in the first montage.

I am not the star of a zombie movie. I am the guy in the background who gets eaten in the first montage.

David Wong quotes: Life is a flickering candle we all carry around. A gust of wind, a meaningless accident, a microsecond of carelessness, and it's out. Forever.

Life is a flickering candle we all carry around. A gust of wind, a meaningless accident, a microsecond of carelessness, and it's out. Forever.

David Wong quotes: If I knew me as somebody else, I would hate me just as much. Why have a double standard?

If I knew me as somebody else, I would hate me just as much. Why have a double standard?

David Wong quotes: I bet his real name is Chad, he looks like one.

I bet his real name is Chad, he looks like one.

David Wong quotes: He gave me a look that would have made cancer apologize, then ran like hell.

He gave me a look that would have made cancer apologize, then ran like hell.

David Wong quotes: I didn't cry. And if you think I did, good luck proving it, asshole.

I didn't cry. And if you think I did, good luck proving it, asshole.

David Wong quotes: The phrase 'sodomized by a bratwurst poltergeist' suddenly flew through my mind.

The phrase 'sodomized by a bratwurst poltergeist' suddenly flew through my mind.

David Wong quotes: Velvet Jesus faced a shadow man to my left. Laser beams fired from his eyes.

Velvet Jesus faced a shadow man to my left. Laser beams fired from his eyes.

David Wong quotes: He made the engine growl and told the headlights to fuck the night.

He made the engine growl and told the headlights to fuck the night.

David Wong quotes: My feet had never been so bare. Those little naked toes.That spider thing probably looks at those like the ears on a chocolate bunny.

My feet had never been so bare. Those little naked toes.That spider thing probably looks at those like the ears on a chocolate bunny.

David Wong quotes: Okay, can somebody quickly just summarize for the shotgun department who it's okay and not okay to shoot?

Okay, can somebody quickly just summarize for the shotgun department who it's okay and not okay to shoot?

David Wong quotes: Please don't not panic!" The

Please don't not panic!" The

David Wong quotes: We're talking about a tentacled flying lamp fucker, Dave. What are you prepared to call unlikely?

We're talking about a tentacled flying lamp fucker, Dave. What are you prepared to call unlikely?

David Wong quotes: The most powerful impression a person can make is that they don't care if they make an impression.

The most powerful impression a person can make is that they don't care if they make an impression.

David Wong quotes: You know if you walked around the world, your hat would travel thirty-one feet farther than your shoes?

You know if you walked around the world, your hat would travel thirty-one feet farther than your shoes?

David Wong quotes: With a bassy thump and a smell like burnt sulfur, Shitload farted himself far into the air.

With a bassy thump and a smell like burnt sulfur, Shitload farted himself far into the air.

David Wong quotes: Damn it! I knew she was a monster! John! Amy! Listen! Guard your buttholes.

Damn it! I knew she was a monster! John! Amy! Listen! Guard your buttholes.

David Wong quotes: My melon soulCrushed by your Gallagher of apathy

My melon soul
Crushed by your Gallagher of apathy

David Wong quotes: And you know what happens when a ship gets too many rats on board? It sinks. That's what. I wondered if a ship had ever really sunk that way.

And you know what happens when a ship gets too many rats on board? It sinks. That's what.
I wondered if a ship had ever really sunk that way.

David Wong quotes: You have to talk through the bratwurst from now on.

You have to talk through the bratwurst from now on.

David Wong quotes: Whoops,' said John. 'I tossed our ball into another universe.''You wanna go home?''Yeah, just let me get my ball.

Whoops,' said John. 'I tossed our ball into another universe.'
'You wanna go home?'
'Yeah, just let me get my ball.

David Wong quotes: What's up. This is Dave, the one you saw in your hallway. He's not a psychotic killer or anything," he lied

What's up. This is Dave, the one you saw in your hallway. He's not a psychotic killer or anything," he lied

David Wong quotes: We moved in silence for a moment and I said, "How did we screw this all up so badly, John?" He shook his head. "We always find a way.

We moved in silence for a moment and I said, "How did we screw this all up so badly, John?"
He shook his head. "We always find a way.

David Wong quotes: John ducked casually across some DO NOT DUCK CASUALLY ACROSS THIS TAPE tape

John ducked casually across some DO NOT DUCK CASUALLY ACROSS THIS TAPE tape

David Wong quotes: I'm scared David""That's good, because there's lots to be afraid of

I'm scared David"
"That's good, because there's lots to be afraid of

David Wong quotes: She wasn't some little princess from the suburbs who just graduated college with a humanities degree, she knew what people were really like.

She wasn't some little princess from the suburbs who just graduated college with a humanities degree, she knew what people were really like.

David Wong quotes: That ability to see the right choice, but not until several hours have passed since making the wrong one? That's what makes a person a dumbass, folks.

That ability to see the right choice, but not until several hours have passed since making the wrong one? That's what makes a person a dumbass, folks.

David Wong quotes: My shame circuits burned out from overuse years ago.

My shame circuits burned out from overuse years ago.

David Wong quotes: There was a faded brown stain on the carpet and I wondered if a patient had once taken a shit in here in the middle of a session. I

There was a faded brown stain on the carpet and I wondered if a patient had once taken a shit in here in the middle of a session. I

David Wong quotes: You know what the scariest part is about people like him? Everything he's doing makes perfect sense in his own mind.

You know what the scariest part is about people like him? Everything he's doing makes perfect sense in his own mind.

David Wong quotes: Some would have doubted their sanity at this point, but by now the part of my mind that issued doubts about my sanity had melted from overuse.

Some would have doubted their sanity at this point, but by now the part of my mind that issued doubts about my sanity had melted from overuse.

David Wong quotes: You don't realize how terrifying the world can be for someone like that, someone who would rather stay in a familiar hole than an unfamiliar mansion.

You don't realize how terrifying the world can be for someone like that, someone who would rather stay in a familiar hole than an unfamiliar mansion.

David Wong quotes: Just go. When you're on your deathbed you're gonna wish you could get back all the time you spent waiting on other people.

Just go. When you're on your deathbed you're gonna wish you could get back all the time you spent waiting on other people.

David Wong quotes: The gun without the training just means you've given your attacker a free gun.

The gun without the training just means you've given your attacker a free gun.

David Wong quotes: Most of the rest of the crowd was lined up in front of food carts selling kebabs, pizza cupcakes, and ice cream churros.

Most of the rest of the crowd was lined up in front of food carts selling kebabs, pizza cupcakes, and ice cream churros.

David Wong quotes: Cops do this every day, rifling closets and digging through your dildo drawer.

Cops do this every day, rifling closets and digging through your dildo drawer.

David Wong quotes: You can't focus on death, or failure. Otherwise you're surrendering greatness to all the people too dumb to contemplate it.

You can't focus on death, or failure. Otherwise you're surrendering greatness to all the people too dumb to contemplate it.

David Wong quotes: Falling in love with a house or a car or a pair of shoes, it was a dead end. You save your love for the things that can love you

Falling in love with a house or a car or a pair of shoes, it was a dead end. You save your love for the things that can love you back.

David Wong quotes: Welcome to freakdom, Dave. It'll be time to start a Web site soon, where you'll type out everything in one huge paragraph.

Welcome to freakdom, Dave. It'll be time to start a Web site soon, where you'll type out everything in one huge paragraph.

David Wong quotes: When they write the sequel to the Bible, that shit is definitely gonna be in there.

When they write the sequel to the Bible, that shit is definitely gonna be in there.

David Wong quotes: My next novel will be the third volume in the John Dies at the End series, and in fact may already exist, again depending on when you're reading this.

My next novel will be the third volume in the John Dies at the End series, and in fact may already exist, again depending on when you're reading this.

David Wong quotes: And - holy shit was this song bad. It was like the singer was stabbing my ear with a dagger made of dried turds.

And - holy shit was this song bad. It was like the singer was stabbing my ear with a dagger made of dried turds.

David Wong quotes: My butt cheeks clenched so tightly that not even light could have escaped.

My butt cheeks clenched so tightly that not even light could have escaped.

David Wong quotes: Welcome to Undisclosed. DreamsInterpreted for Beer.

Welcome to Undisclosed. Dreams
Interpreted for Beer.

David Wong quotes: No, I don't, like, play an instrument or anything.I'm just ... well, you saw me at the beginning there. I was the guy that fell down and died.

No, I don't, like, play an instrument or anything.I'm just ... well, you saw me at the beginning there. I was the guy that fell down and died.

David Wong quotes: New technology is not good or evil in and of itself. It's all about how people choose to use it.

New technology is not good or evil in and of itself. It's all about how people choose to use it.

David Wong quotes: Anyhow, Molly died, in the way that all really good things die, fast and brutal and for no apparent reason.

Anyhow, Molly died, in the way that all really good things die, fast and brutal and for no apparent reason.

David Wong quotes: I want no part of this nonsense. This whole city is a butt that farts horror.

I want no part of this nonsense. This whole city is a butt that farts horror.

David Wong quotes: Your 'let's remain calm and stay put' speech would be a lot more convincing if you weren't giving it in front of a pile of burning skeletons.

Your 'let's remain calm and stay put' speech would be a lot more convincing if you weren't giving it in front of a pile of burning skeletons.

David Wong quotes: We fixed him just by telling him that he wasn't crazy, that the horrors he was seeing were real. He seemed oddly comforted by that. He was a lawyer.

We fixed him just by telling him that he wasn't crazy, that the horrors he was seeing were real. He seemed oddly comforted by that. He was a lawyer.

David Wong quotes: Snap. Ka-chunk. That's how I spell the sound of a doorknob turning.

Snap. Ka-chunk. That's how I spell the sound of a doorknob turning.

David Wong quotes: John jolted awake to find himself staring down a shotgun wielded by his greatest enemy: himself.

John jolted awake to find himself staring down a shotgun wielded by his greatest enemy: himself.

David Wong quotes: I walked right into a girl, broadsided her, felled her like a tree. I saw, to my horror, that it was Jennifer Lopez.

I walked right into a girl, broadsided her, felled her like a tree. I saw, to my horror, that it was Jennifer Lopez.

David Wong quotes: ANYBODY ORDER A JAILBREAK WITH A SIDE OF SHOTGUN?

ANYBODY ORDER A JAILBREAK WITH A SIDE OF SHOTGUN?

David Wong quotes: Molech swung and kicked and slaughtered Mexican food with every mighty blow, while a quarter billion extremely confused Blink users watched. And

Molech swung and kicked and slaughtered Mexican food with every mighty blow, while a quarter billion extremely confused Blink users watched. And

David Wong quotes: Something coming back from the dead was almost always bad news. Movies taught me that. For every one Jesus you get a million zombies.

Something coming back from the dead was almost always bad news. Movies taught me that. For every one Jesus you get a million zombies.

David Wong quotes: Gullibility is a knife at the throat of civilization.

Gullibility is a knife at the throat of civilization.

David Wong quotes: No matter where you go, management is always a bunch of cheap bastards.

No matter where you go, management is always a bunch of cheap bastards.

David Wong quotes: Somewhere, Charles Darwin nodded and smiled a knowing smile.

Somewhere, Charles Darwin nodded and smiled a knowing smile.