Tosh Funny Quotes: top 35 famous quotes about Tosh Funny

Tosh Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Tosh Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: How come everybody cheers when chicks flash their

How come everybody cheers when chicks flash their T&A, but when I pull out my D&Bs, i'm a registered sex offender. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Me: Technology is a Beautiful Thing ... When It

Technology is a Beautiful Thing ...
When It Works ... — Me

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I'm actually all for gay marriage. Just the

I'm actually all for gay marriage. Just the thought of having a man around the house ... — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: It's not a stereotype if it's always true.

It's not a stereotype if it's always true. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: It's not Spring Break until somebody dies!

It's not Spring Break until somebody dies! — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: You know your girlfriend is too young when

You know your girlfriend is too young when she'll do everything in bed but go upside down because it's too scary. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: The only reason Woodstock was necessary is because

The only reason Woodstock was necessary is because they didn't have iTunes. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I don't know what's funny and what's not

I don't know what's funny and what's not so I test out all of my material in front of audiences. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Jack Kerouac: Don't drink to get drunk. Drink to enjoy

Don't drink to get drunk. Drink to enjoy life. — Jack Kerouac

Tosh Funny Quotes By Sharon Creech: Zola smills, smuggles, what is that word? What

Zola smills, smuggles, what is that word? What is it, that word for the happy teeth?? — Sharon Creech

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I don't know, maybe I'm immature, but I

I don't know, maybe I'm immature, but I still find it funny if I dump cold water on my girlfriend when she's in the shower. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: That Asian guy is really good at kicking.

That Asian guy is really good at kicking. Shocking. Someone is pressing 'A' really fast somewhere. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Danette Crawford: God blesses us financially "so that" we can

God blesses us financially "so that" we can be a blessing to others. — Danette Crawford

Tosh Funny Quotes By Heinrich Heine: God will forgive me; that's his business.

God will forgive me; that's his business. — Heinrich Heine

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: If no meant no then every man would

If no meant no then every man would die a virgin. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Bob Dylan: You can hurt someone and not even know

You can hurt someone and not even know it. — Bob Dylan

Tosh Funny Quotes By Josh Lanyon: All cynics are disappointed idealists. The more stars

All cynics are disappointed idealists. The more stars in the eyes, the harder the fall. — Josh Lanyon

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: You are a sick freak who should be

You are a sick freak who should be beaten. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Leonard Nimoy: Art, if it is successful, needs no explanation.

Art, if it is successful, needs no explanation. — Leonard Nimoy

Tosh Funny Quotes By Sunday Adelaja: Reconsider your life and see how you can

Reconsider your life and see how you can make things work for yourself — Sunday Adelaja

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: Thank you ... San Francisco. All right, you're

Thank you ... San Francisco. All right, you're ruining the show. Thank you ... for clapping for what my parents are ashamed of. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I hope God speaks English. If I get

I hope God speaks English. If I get up to heaven and have to point at a menu, I'm gonna be pissed. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Lailah Gifty Akita: Everywhere, I am welcome, I will stay there.

Everywhere, I am welcome, I will stay there. — Lailah Gifty Akita

Tosh Funny Quotes By Tone-Loc: It was her mother, I didn't know what

It was her mother, I didn't know what to say, I was hanging by a string. She said, hey you two, I was once like you and liked to do the wild thing. — Tone-Loc

Tosh Funny Quotes By Rysa Walker: Watching people you love walk into danger is

Watching people you love walk into danger is a hundred times harder than walking into it yourself. — Rysa Walker

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I'm not a racist or misogynist person, but

I'm not a racist or misogynist person, but I find these jokes funny, so I say them. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I came up with my own expression. I

I came up with my own expression. I like to make it hail. Yeah. That's when you throw change on sluts. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I'm sick of the media making female sports

I'm sick of the media making female sports athletes into supermodels, when they're clearly sixes at best. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: Wouldn't it be funny if that girl got

Wouldn't it be funny if that girl got raped by like, 5 guys right now? Like right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped her ... — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: I hope we find a cure for every

I hope we find a cure for every major disease, because I'm tired of walking 5K. I'm pretty sure I don't have to sweat for cancer. I'll write a check. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Matthea Harvey: Usually form seems to find me in the

Usually form seems to find me in the process of writing a poem, though I have nothing against starting out with the form. — Matthea Harvey

Tosh Funny Quotes By Ralph Blum: Know thyself. Nothing in excess. The Self is

Know thyself. Nothing in excess. The Self is required to balance the Self. — Ralph Blum

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: Here's a shock: An adult who still hangs

Here's a shock: An adult who still hangs out in skate parks is a bad parent. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Daniel Tosh: Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with

Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it. — Daniel Tosh

Tosh Funny Quotes By Marilyn French: My books are water; those of the great

My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine - everybody drinks water. — Marilyn French