Ogden Nash Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about Ogden Nash

Ogden Nash Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Ogden Nash quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

One thing that literature would be greatly the better for
Would be a more restricted employment by authors of simile and>metaphor. — Ogden Nash

My fellow man I do not care for.
I often ask me, What's he there for?
The only answer i can find
Is, Reproduction of his kind. — Ogden Nash

Elephants are useful friends: they have handles on both ends. — Ogden Nash

O thrice unhappy home Whose master doesn't know the difference between a watt and an ohm! — Ogden Nash

The truth I do not stretch or shove
When I state the dog is full of love.
I've also proved, by actual test,
A wet dog is the lovingest. — Ogden Nash

Bankers are just like everybody else, except richer. — Ogden Nash

When there are monsters there are miracles. — Ogden Nash

People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they don't want it. — Ogden Nash

The only way I can distinguish proper from improper fractions is by their actions — Ogden Nash

Linguistics becomes an ever eerier area, like I feel like I'm in Oz, Just trying to tell it like it was. — Ogden Nash

The Bronx? No Thonx! — Ogden Nash

You are much happier when you are happy than when you ain't. — Ogden Nash

To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up. — Ogden Nash

I'm like a backward berry, Unripened on the vine, For all my friends are fifty, And I'm only forty-nine. — Ogden Nash

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work. — Ogden Nash

Either you get eaten by a wolf today or else the shepherd saves you from the wolf so he can sell you to the butcher tomorrow — Ogden Nash

Progress is a fine thing, but it's gone on long enough. — Ogden Nash

God in His wisdom made the fly And then forgot to tell us why. — Ogden Nash

When you're wrong admit it, when you're right, shut up. — Ogden Nash

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all. — Ogden Nash

The trouble with a kitten is that it eventually becomes a cat. — Ogden Nash

The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks Which practically conceal its sex I think it clever of the turtle In such a fix to be so fertile. — Ogden Nash

The door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly. — Ogden Nash

We love the kindly wind and hail, The jolly thunderbolt, We watch in glee the fairy trail Of ampere, watt, and volt. — Ogden Nash

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. — Ogden Nash

I'd rather be a great bad poet than a good bad poet. — Ogden Nash

Basketball, a game which won't be fit for people until they set the basket umbilicus-high and return the giraffes to the zoo. — Ogden Nash

I am a conscientious man, when I throw rocks at seabirds I leave no tern unstoned. — Ogden Nash

Another good thing about gossip is that it is within everybody's reach, And it is much more interesting than any other form of speech. — Ogden Nash

Bankers are just like anybody else, only richer — Ogden Nash

I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, Were it not for making a living, which is rather a nouciance. — Ogden Nash

Here's a good rule of thumb; too clever is dumb. — Ogden Nash

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. — Ogden Nash

I don't care how unkind the things people say about me so long as they don't say them to my face. — Ogden Nash

Here lies my past, Goodbye I have kissed it; Thank you kids, I wouldn't have missed it. — Ogden Nash

I could not eat a kangaroo. But many fine Australians do. Those with cookbooks as well as boomerangs Prefer him in tasty kangaroo-meringues. — Ogden Nash

Celery, raw,
Develops the jaw — Ogden Nash

All that glitters is sold as gold. — Ogden Nash

A cough is something that you yourself cant help, but everybody else does on purpose just to torment you. — Ogden Nash

I would not engage the wombat
In any form of mortal combat. — Ogden Nash

One thing about the past. It's likely to last. — Ogden Nash

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. — Ogden Nash

He without benefit of scruples - His fun and money soon quadruples. — Ogden Nash

Remorse is violent dyspepsia of the mind. — Ogden Nash

There's nothing that keeps it's youth
So far as I know, but a tree and the truth
— Ogden Nash

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. — Ogden Nash

Professional men, they have no cares;
Whatever happens, they get theirs. — Ogden Nash

Some primal termite knocked on wood.
And tasted it, and found it good.
And that is why your Cousin May
Fell through the parlor floor today. — Ogden Nash

Dogs display reluctance and wrath If you try to give them a bath. They bury bones in hideaways And half the time they trot sideaways. — Ogden Nash

Middle-aged life is merry, and I love to lead it. — Ogden Nash

Why did the Lord give use so much quickness unless it was to avoid responsibility? — Ogden Nash

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor. — Ogden Nash

No man is greater than his respect for sleep. — Ogden Nash

Too much Chablis can make you whablis. — Ogden Nash

ADVENTURES OF ISABEL
Isabel — Ogden Nash

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. — Ogden Nash

I test my bath before I sit, And I'm always moved to wonderment That what chills the finger not a bit Is so frigid upon the fundament. — Ogden Nash

I was born a jackdaw; why should I try to be an owl? — Ogden Nash

Progress might have been all right once, but it's gone on too long. — Ogden Nash

Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker. — Ogden Nash

A lady wants to be dressed exactly like everybody else but she gets pretty up- set if she sees anybody else dressed exactly like her. — Ogden Nash

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk. — Ogden Nash

Time is like the ocean, always there, always different. — Ogden Nash

The song of canaries
Never varies,
And when they're moulting
They're pretty revolting. — Ogden Nash

Man is a victim of dope
In the incurable form of hope! — Ogden Nash

The camel has a single hump, The dromedary, two; Or else the other way around; I'm never sure. Are you? — Ogden Nash

Every Englishman is convinced of one thing, viz.: That to be an Englishman is to belong to the most exclusive club there is. — Ogden Nash

The codfish is a staple food For which I'm seldom in the mood. This fish is such an utter loss That people eat it with egg sauce. — Ogden Nash

It is the sin of omission, the second kind of sin,
That lays eggs under your skin. — Ogden Nash

Too clever is dumb. — Ogden Nash

When I remember bygone days I think how evening follows morn So many I loved were not yet dead, So many I love were not yet born. — Ogden Nash

Stuyvesant chats with Kelly and Katz, The professor warms to the broker, And life is good in the brotherhood Of an air-conditioned smoker. — Ogden Nash

In real life, it takes only one to make a quarrel. — Ogden Nash

But all ladies think they weigh too much. — Ogden Nash

No matter how deep and dark your pit, how dank your shroud, their heads are heroically unbloody and unbowed. — Ogden Nash

You can take it as understood,
That your luck changes only if it's good. — Ogden Nash

I claim there ain't Another Saint As great as Valentine. — Ogden Nash

But children, hark! Your mother would rather, When you arrived, have been your father. — Ogden Nash

I have an idea that the phrase "the weaker sex" was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm. - OGDEN NASH — Daniel G. Amen

Maybe I couldn't be dafter, But I keep wondering if this time we settle our differences before a war instead of after. — Ogden Nash

Any kiddie in school can love like a fool, But Hating, my boy, is an Art. — Ogden Nash

A bit of talcum Is always walcum. — Ogden Nash

Smallpox is natural; vaccine ain't. — Ogden Nash

It's my own dream, I dreamt it, I dreamt that my hair was kempt, then I dremat my true love unkempt it. — Ogden Nash

Beneath this slab John Brown is stowed. He watched the ads, And not the road. — Ogden Nash

The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift. — Ogden Nash

Were it not for frustration and humiliation
I suppose the human race would get ideas above its station. — Ogden Nash

Some one invented the telephone, And interrupted a nation's slumbers, Ringing wrong but similar numbers. — Ogden Nash

Women would rather be right than reasonable. — Ogden Nash

And you stagger down to break your fast. Greasy bacon and lacquered eggs And coffee composed of frigid dregs. — Ogden Nash

One bliss for which There is no match Is when you itch To up and scratch. — Ogden Nash

In the world of mules
There are no rules. — Ogden Nash

I think in terms of rhyme, and have since I was six years old, — Ogden Nash

Humor is the best means of surviving in a difficult world. — Ogden Nash

Behold the Zebra on the plains, And shudder at his mighty manes! — Ogden Nash

Good wine needs no bush, and perhaps products that people really want need no hard-sell or soft-sell TV push. Why not? Look at pot. — Ogden Nash

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch. — Ogden Nash

To keep one's marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up. - Ogden Nash — Meg Cabot

A husband is a man who two minutes after his head touches the pillow is snoring like an overloaded omnibus. — Ogden Nash

I am tarred and feathered with Time. — Ogden Nash