Kimmel Quotes: top 68 famous quotes about Kimmel

Kimmel Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Kimmel quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

People's lives are boring. — Jimmy Kimmel

Jimmy Kimmel still comes across like a guy who crashed a party and got caught at it, yet adamantly refuses to leave. — Tom Shales

My job as a parent is a temporary responsibility with eternal consequences. — Tim Kimmel

But I think that what you'll discover more and more as you get older is that most people aren't thinking about you at all. — Haven Kimmel

The issue isn't
nor should it ever be
how weak our child is, but rather how strong our God is. — Tim Kimmel

I never imagined being on television. — Jimmy Kimmel

Ironically, survey after survey shows that married men are happier and healthier than unmarried men. Oh, and they also have more sex. — Michael Kimmel

You're never so bad you can't have a Savior, no matter how much you've sinned. — Tim Kimmel

Mooreland is a long way to go to not to be anywhere when you get there. — Haven Kimmel

Energy is what I believe all of us are. We're just conscious awareness dancing for itself for no other reason but to stay amused. — Jim Carrey

I couldn't for the life of me figure out how long a person had to live, or how good she had to be, to get her hands on some treasure. — Haven Kimmel

Mother always said she was a size 7 woman she kept wrapped in fat to prevent bruising. — Haven Kimmel

Getting into heaven has nothing to do with what we do for Christ, but rather what He has already done for us. — Tim Kimmel

Children who know they are loved, know they have a purpose, and know they have a hope are prepared for anything this world wants to dish up. — Tim Kimmel

I sensed weeping and salvation in the air, two of my least favorite things. — Haven Kimmel

How could they possibly be Japanese planes? — Husband E. Kimmel

Honestly, a lot of the human etiquette I learned in life I learned from, like, thank-you notes and dating Jimmy Kimmel. — Roseanne Barr

Frankly, I'm guessing that before getting to my house today, Shoshanna had thought the Hoover Dam was some kind of vacuum cleaner attachment. — Elizabeth Cody Kimmel

I have like fifteen televisions in my house. — Jimmy Kimmel

If I have one criticism of the other late-night shows, it's that they're almost entirely scripted. — Jimmy Kimmel

I could no longer look at him. I wished, in fact, for blindness. — Haven Kimmel

My hair looks like it had been purchased at a rummage sale after all the real hair was gone. — Haven Kimmel

I'm a terrible golfer. — Jimmy Kimmel

When you know someone you can make a little more fun of them without them getting offended. — Jimmy Kimmel

What kind of good deeds? Like Girl Scouts? Because I got kicked out of Brownies and they won't give me another chance to keep my clothes on at camp. — Haven Kimmel

My definition of cursing is probably different from what other people's definitions are. — Jimmy Kimmel

I respect every way in which you are a troublemaker, now get up and do what your mother says. — Haven Kimmel

There are people in this world so perfect that the fact of them seems like a personal gift ... — Haven Kimmel

You don't need to exorcise your personal demons onstage. — Jimmy Kimmel

In our families, we are finding that abandoning that sense of masculine entitlement actually enables us to live happier lives. — Michael S. Kimmel

I only get unusual ailments. — Jimmy Kimmel

White men in North America are the beneficiaries of the single biggest affirmative action program in world history. It's called world history. — Michael Kimmel

I go to Costco every weekend. It's my favorite part of the week. — Jimmy Kimmel

Every day life must always be lived against the backdrop of eternity. — Tim Kimmel

I did not have any delusions of grandeur as a kid. — Jimmy Kimmel

There must be some middle ground between broken hearts and pure standoffishness. — Kathleen Kimmel

Real emotion is good - or doing a good job of faking real emotion. — Jimmy Kimmel

The book was so clean and white, and the letters were so perfectly black and defenseless; it would have been like tearing the ears off a kitten. — Haven Kimmel

Fear based parenting is the surest way to create intimidated children. — Tim Kimmel

No matter who it is, I hate to see people losing their jobs. I really do. — Jimmy Kimmel

That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't. — Jimmy Kimmel

Love is the commitment of my will to your needs and best interests, regardless of the cost. — Tim Kimmel

On Letterman and Leno, it always bothers me when they go outside the studio and it's daytime. — Jimmy Kimmel

Some of the worst elements of Guyland rest on the twin pillars of men's silence and women's compliance. — Michael Kimmel

...every beautiful and strange event made more poignant for having been photographed. — Haven Kimmel

Privilege is invisible to those who have it. — Michael Kimmel

I love Jimmy Fallon and Jimmy Kimmel. — Mike Birbiglia

Hey, it's Florida. Toss a beach ball at me, I'll empty my .45 into you and be home in time for Jimmy Kimmel. — Paul Levine

I'm a creative consultant, whatever that means. — Jimmy Kimmel

Our sins are never too great for God to forgive. — Tim Kimmel

He's no John Walton. — Haven Kimmel

I have had a lot of experience in broadcasting. — Jimmy Kimmel

How is it possible, she thought, that a person can drive a thinking, feeling, animal to slaughter and not become less than an animal himself? — Haven Kimmel

I once heard her tell a friend that she was, in fact, a 120-pound woman, but she kept herself wrapped in fat in order to prevent bruising. — Haven Kimmel

On the contrary, if grandparents want to make a positive difference in their grandchildren's lives, they must have a plan. — Tim Kimmel

I got kicked out of Brownies and they won't give me another chance to keep my clothes on at camp. Also — Haven Kimmel

My aunt and uncle are clearly civilians. — Jimmy Kimmel

We have the data to prove to men that gender equality is not a zero-sum game, but a win-win. — Michael Kimmel

You can say Pizza Hut is terrible pizza, but they also sell more pizzas than anybody else. — Jimmy Kimmel

Decoupage hit Mooreland pretty hard... — Haven Kimmel

Living a good life may keep you out of jail, but it cannot keep you out of hell. — Tim Kimmel

I don't really need to be dirty to be funny. — Jimmy Kimmel

It was just your life. You were just living your life. — Haven Kimmel

I describe myself as a human being. — Jimmy Kimmel

I can't be as flip as I once was. — Jimmy Kimmel

I think there is another choice for women; it involves challenging Guyland and supporting each other. — Michael Kimmel

I still love comic books. When you have a kid, that's an excuse to keep reading all the comic books. — Jimmy Kimmel

I know there are, like, 12 rules for late night: a desk, a band. Will people take me seriously if I don't wear a tie? — Jimmy Kimmel