Humor Birthday Quotes: top 32 famous quotes about Humor Birthday

Humor Birthday Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Humor Birthday quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

You got me a birthday cake. It was pink. I smashed it into the ceiling. — Karen Marie Moning

Around people I don't know, I'm totally at a loss. — Barbra Streisand

Rule #10 If you say it enough times in your head, it will come true (sometimes). — Meg Cabot

For my sister's 50th birthday, I sent her a singing mammogram. — Steven Wright

Last year my birthday cake looked like a prairie fire. — Rodney Dangerfield

You cannot learn to curse like an American. — Nathan Englander

Some friends of mine got me a sweater for my birthday. I'd have preferred a moaner or a screamer, but the sweater was OK. — Steven Wright

By the time he graduates, projected to be by his thirtieth birthday, Wheeler's transcript will be a meme used to scare children into studying harder. — Kurt Dinan

Cooks are an undervalued, awesome profession. — Tom Douglas

Someone asked me when is my birthday?
The poet inside me replied,
My birthday is on the last day of the year,
It's 31st December my dear! — Anamika Mishra

Just so I'm clear ... you thought a brothel would be a suitable place to host a birthday party for a woman? — Lindsay Buroker

The past you lost is just like a dream. As you woke up new life
starts. So, your actual birthday will be your death day. — A.G Sorachi

I find rest for my soul in arms of the Saviour. — Lailah Gifty Akita

If you lie to yourself you will lie to God too. — Tyler Perry

I have no problems with buying tampons. I am a fairly modern man. But apparently they're not a "proper" present. "Happy birthday, mum!" — Jimmy Carr

She's 80 my nan, what do you want for your birthday? "SHREDDER!! GET ME A SHREDDER!!", what do you want a shredder for? "IDENTITY THEFT!!". — Russell Howard

Most of my songs make fun of myself. — Bo Burnham

Being a pathfinder is to be willing to risk failure and still go on. — Gail Sheehy

Isn't it wonderful to give birth to your own kind? — Lailah Gifty Akita

If this is where you ask me to run around in my birthday suit, I'm not entirely comfortable with that, I said, smirking. — Laura Kreitzer

Violet Lynn Parker, you'd better spill or I'll start bellowing 'Happy Birthday' to you in my Bobcat Goldthwait voice. — Ann Charles

If you don't read my book, I'm not coming to your birthday party. — Tim Yeager

I hate to tell you this, but it's not my birthday. Do I still get the present? ~ Michael McCade — Samanthe Beck

A Christian is never dependent on the response of others to grow spiritually. It's our own heart's decisions that matter — Gary L. Thomas

My birthday? Is he gay?" Eli asked me with a confused look on his face. — Mariana Zapata

The law is the witness and external deposit of our moral life. Its history is the history of the moral development of the race. — Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

hope your birthday is hot hot hot — Jeff Kinney

I'm actually a perpetual 13-year-old. I've never advanced beyond 13. Every day, tomorrow is my 14th birthday. That's my kind of humor. — Terry Crews

Never touch my brother on his fucking birthday. — Jim Butcher

Democracy presumes that we're all created equal; competition proves we are not, or else every race would end in a tie. — Nancy Gibbs

Better live a King, than a Prince. — Napoleon Bonaparte

You were just supposed to be a one night stand but you poked my eye, and kissed me sweet and listened to my car. Now, I kinda wanna keep you. — Lola Stark