Greg Fitzsimmons Quotes
Collection of top 36 famous quotes about Greg Fitzsimmons
Greg Fitzsimmons Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Greg Fitzsimmons quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
They say men have a sexual thought every 20 seconds. The other 19 are shame.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
Some people meditate because they need more energy and when you meditate you get a tremendous amount of energy.
— Frederick Lenz
We are now able to create virtual realities on computers. Are we all living in one created by someone in the future?
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I enjoy writing the same way I enjoy doing standup. Part of the challenge is being creative and making it work no matter what the constraints.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
Somebody stole my identity. Good luck using it without the medications.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I feel like I am too old to eat jelly. But I am too young to eat prunes. I am between grapes.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
You should choose your battles if you can, but if the battle chooses you then kick the sod in his fuse box!
— Fredrik Backman
I'm kinda stuck in that awkward in-between stage where my hair is just starting to fall out, but I'm still maintaining my youthful acne.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
Don't be like me. Look at me: monogamous, in shape, no debt, sober ... I'm dead inside.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I was just in Las Vegas, where prostitution is legal. Which is a relief because I live in Los Angeles, where it is mandatory.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I wanted the bitch to know i didn't care anymore
— Dave Pelzer
Debt means you had more fun than you were supposed to.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
We do not choose the vessel we're given, Iola Anne, but we choose what we pour out and what we keep inside, she say.
— Lisa Wingate
Driving around with a receding hairline and two kids in a Prius feels a bit boring for me.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
The most interesting hipsters are ones who stop being hipsters.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
It is not the same thing to be good and to be kind.
— Cassandra Clare
If we don't have souls then who am I talking to when I keep telling myself to be good?
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I have to stop watching the Olympics. It just reminds me that I forgot to try really hard at something.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I feel life is to be lived. You want to spend your time doing things and being with friends and all that.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
If you want to find guys with small penises, go to the Hummer dealership.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I am not who I sleep with. I am not my weight. I am not my mother. I am myself. And I am all of you, and I thank you.
— Amy Schumer
The best drunks are the ones who only hang out with other drunks in places we all know are filled with drunks.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
I'm sure people are shocked when they see a guy speeding and cutting them off and having road rage while in a Prius.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
When a banana gets rotten people love to tell you that you can make banana bread out of it. I have never seen anyone actually do it.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
They say no one knows if we all see red the same way. Except traffic cops.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
To be of use in even a single burst of flame and sound is worth more than a lifetime of achieving nothing.
— Brandon Sanderson
I love when problems have simple solutions. Cold medicine. Umbrellas. Condoms. Tax incentives & subsidies attracting favored industries.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
Taking down the Christmas tree makes it feel official: time to get back to joyless and cynical.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
Rescuing dogs is looked upon as a noble, trendy pursuit. But wouldn't rescuing a man from a homeless shelter be, in fact, more humane?
— Greg Fitzsimmons
My kids teased me at dinner that I'm not cool. I told them if I was cool I wouldn't be sitting at home with my kids. Pass the gravy.
— Greg Fitzsimmons
It is strange how new and unexpected conditions bring out unguessed ability to meet them.
— Edgar Rice Burroughs
If you want to stop two people from having sex, let them get married.
— Greg Fitzsimmons