Girl Funny Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Girl Funny
Girl Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Girl Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
I'm meeting the attic before I meet the girl.
— Colleen Hoover
Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, 'How's it going with that girl?' 'One day at a time, man.'
— Adam Ferrara
Strippers should be role-models for little girls. If only for the fact that they wax their assholes.
— Sarah Silverman
Their vaginas were just ships passing in the night, stopping to pick up every dirty sailor.
— K.F. Germaine
Vomit and shit, even your own, stink.
— Sheeja Jose
He glanced up once, eyes bored. Please stop talking. I'm trying to eat.
— Kate Avery Ellison
Everyone loves a kick-ass girl. (Well- maybe not her enemies, but you know what I mean.)
— Sarah Cross
I once went out with this girl, she was no bargain either, she showed up with pigtails under her arms.
— Rodney Dangerfield
One should never give up on hope. Unless that's the name of the girl who cheated on you in which case, yeah, give her up.
— Carroll Bryant
I was the girl with cake batter in her hair, egg on her shirt and her foot in her mouth. Always.
— Kari Luna
The shooting of the guns, that was kind of funny, because rolling a cigarette and shooting a gun aren't like normal things for a 13-year old girl!
— Hailee Steinfeld
Oh baby", Madoc groaned to the girl next to him. "Snickers ain't the only thing king sized.
— Penelope Douglas
Who are you?' Gaia gasped.
The girl froze for a moment.
Looked at her. Smiled and said, 'Who am I? I'm the Breeze, bitch! — Michael Grant
The girl froze for a moment.
Looked at her. Smiled and said, 'Who am I? I'm the Breeze, bitch! — Michael Grant
The sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless, bottomless', I went inside and there was nobody there!
— Rodney Dangerfield
Or, as Nikolas had said, in tones of admiration, She can tell you to go to hell in a way that will send you running of to pack your bags.
— Mercedes Lackey
That's the problem with best friends. Sometimes they know you better than you know yourself.
— Cecily Von Ziegesar
Anything above 40 is a little too old for me. I just look for a girl who is funny and has nice eyes and a smile.
— Justin Bieber
You said she's a senior? Babe we're ALL crazy.
— Cecily Von Ziegesar
Minimalism is a girl's best asset, blend tones, smudge hard outlines; if all else fails; Photoshop it.
— Judith Chambers
The girl may have been tiny, but everything about her said, I'm not scared of you, so piss off.
— Christine Manzari
A real girl isn't perfect and a perfect girl isn't real.
— Harry Styles
A boy and a girl started dating after he backed his car into hers. They met by accident.
— Adam Young
Now there's a girl I don't want to mess with' - or at least, that's what I would think if I had a chronic fear of freakishly nice people.
— Nenia Campbell
Sometimes girls act all TNT Network because they know drama. That's when guys get all TBS around you because we think it's very funny.
— Dane Cook
She's cute, I thought, but you don't need to like a girl who treats you like you're ten: You've already got a mom.
— John Green
Asshole FBI agents that want to shoot Girl Scouts.
— C.J. Roberts
Besides, what do I know about being a wife? There are much more important qualities to have than a docile disposition.
— C.J. Redwine
It's funny how you can go from hating a girl to maybe liking her, maybe liking her a lot, just because she shows a little interest in you.
— Louis Sachar
Life is what you make it. Unless some guy finds you with his girl. Then the ball's pretty much in his court.
— Lois Greiman
Instead I sounded like a little girl on her first day of kindergarten. My name is Bee, and I like coloring and horsies.
— Kate Avery Ellison
But a movie doesn't have to be good if it has Hugh Jackman.
— Jesse Andrews
My dad wears girls' clothes - it's so funny. Sometimes I see him and I'm like, 'Nice shirt!,' because it's from my closet.
— Liv Tyler
Remember. Make him cry uncle.
Cry uncle, my posterior. I'm going to make him cry like a girl who broke her mom's designer heels at the prom. — Sherrilyn Kenyon
Cry uncle, my posterior. I'm going to make him cry like a girl who broke her mom's designer heels at the prom. — Sherrilyn Kenyon
Some girls want to be a princess when they grow up. I wanted to be in a bad bitch girl gang.
— Natalia Kills
I like a funny girl. Smart. Talented. I like someone who is good at music - that always intrigues me.
— Tom Felton
Never in his life had he hit a girl, nor would he. But, right now, he wanted to kick that NSA cutie in the ass cheek.
— Shane Scollins
I like girls who are intelligent, somewhat funny, and pretty with a nice personality.
— Leonardo DiCaprio
The girl has a funny way of romanticizing things.
— Karen Russell
It's funny, he said, have you ever thought that a girl's clothes cost more than the girl inside them?
— Jean Rhys
Yes! Yes! There's the attitude. Where was that girl during the race? Off getting sushi?
— Doug Solter
He caught her staring and smiled-not a conceited I-work-out-and-have-a-great-body type smirk, but more of a I'm-a-boy; you're-a-girl; life is good.
— Cherise Sinclair
The human body is the best work of art.
— Jess C. Scott
I'm in a situation with this girl that's as hopeless as overthrowing the Bush administration.
— Aziz Ansari
We took pictures of the native girls, but they weren't developed ... But we're going back next week.
— Groucho Marx
After making love I said to my girl, "Was it good for you too?" And she said, "I don't think this was good for anybody."
— Garry Shandling
Wouldn't it be funny if that girl got raped by like, 5 guys right now? Like right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped her ...
— Daniel Tosh
I like girls to be wild but at the same time beautifully brought up and very funny.
— Karl Lagerfeld
There is strong. There is Army Strong. And then there is Army Wife Strong.
— Aditi Mathur Kumar
I can't decide whether I'm a good girl wrapped up in a bad girl, or if I'm a bad girl wrapped up in a good girl. And that's how I know I'm a woman!
— C. JoyBell C.
We all men want a bad girl friend, but a good wife.
— M.F. Moonzajer
What kind of good deeds? Like Girl Scouts? Because I got kicked out of Brownies and they won't give me another chance to keep my clothes on at camp.
— Haven Kimmel
I knew a girl so ugly, she had a face like a saint-a Saint Bernard!
— Rodney Dangerfield
Tip#27
Kiss a girl if you're a female,
If you're a single male kiss a Guy
(Idea)
It's fun to offend society ~ — Hazel Cartwright
Kiss a girl if you're a female,
If you're a single male kiss a Guy
(Idea)
It's fun to offend society ~ — Hazel Cartwright
Say, Cuttino. What are those Godawful clothes you're wearing? Man, this ain't Rhode Island anymore. You're in the NBA. The girls have teeth here.
— Charles Barkley
When I first started I was always known as The Girl on the Sitcom with the Funny Voice.
— Julie Benz
I appreciate humor so much, but I'm actually not a funny girl.
— Emmanuelle Chriqui
what with the follies and an indecent proposal it's been quite a night
— Barbra Streisand
The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn't have.
— Will Ferrell
He really needed to stop being so hot while his hands were on me.
— Veronica Blade
Don't make being a girl or a victim part of your stand-up act. If you encounter sexism in the business, don't bring it on stage; it's not funny.
— Jen Kirkman
Accents are funny. It sets me apart from the other girls doing comedy. It gives me more - how do you say? - pop-oo-laaarrrity.
— Sofia Vergara
Everyone thinks softball is a girl's game. But you only think that until you get hit with it on a line drive.
— Jerry Smith
I was often the only white girl in the Indian dance class. That felt funny, but doing Indian dance was great.
— Roselee Goldberg
I pat her on the head. "Oh, naive little Kitten. Dear, foolish girl. This cookie is worth all this and more. Sit or you will not partake.
— Jenny Han
You've got the holy trinity of what a girl wants, she said. Cute, smart, funny. I don't think you realize that.
— Alex Bradley
It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about being a girl, it's about being a funny comic.
— Iliza Shlesinger
(Annabeth says most of that salt water is in my head. Very funny, Wise Girl.) Anyway,
— Rick Riordan
He's quite extraordinary with his moves and spins. I think he was a baton girl in a past life [on his co-star Hayden Christensen].
— Ewan McGregor
I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her.
— Rodney Dangerfield
You may say what you want to, but in my opinion she had more sand in her than any girl I ever see; in my opinion she was just full of sand.
— Mark Twain
I went out with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number ... She looked great going down the stairs.
— Milton Jones
She says with that misty
far-away look in her eyes. Like conjunctivitis. — Aditi Mathur Kumar
far-away look in her eyes. Like conjunctivitis. — Aditi Mathur Kumar
He is my dog, Toto," answered Dorothy.
"Is he made of tin, or stuffed?" asked the Lion.
"Neither. He's a
a
a meat dog," said the girl. — L. Frank Baum
"Is he made of tin, or stuffed?" asked the Lion.
"Neither. He's a
a
a meat dog," said the girl. — L. Frank Baum
I'm at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to.
— Rodney Dangerfield
When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second.
— Albert Einstein
Man, my girl is one tough chick when she wants to be. I wonder if it has something to do with those
big, comfy granny panties she's got on. — Simone Elkeles
big, comfy granny panties she's got on. — Simone Elkeles
Here's the thing. I met this girl, this beautiful woman who's unlike anyone I've ever met. She's funny, and brave
— Denise Grover Swank
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."
— Rodney Dangerfield
You should never be mean to other girls. I don't care what grade you're in. Be nice to people until you're my age ... and you have your own TV show.
— Chelsea Handler