Funny Worse Than Quotes

We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse. — Henny Youngman

I finally got up around noon, after having decided that, as far as monogamous relationships go, I could probably do worse than marrying my bed. — Robyn Schneider

Funny thing about the monster. The worse he treats you, the more you love him. — Ellen Hopkins

I think it's very funny that someone would exaggerate to make himself look worse. — David Leavitt

When I opened the door, Andrew was standing there like a remedy for heart palpitations. Or maybe he made them worse. It was hard to tell. — N.R. Walker

There is only one thing worse than training employees and losing them,
and that's not training them and keeping them — Zig Ziglar

Funny how days are like that. Some days start off rubbish and get worse as they go on, others start well and get better. — Chris Higgins

What was worse, he couldn't tell her how much he thought he maybe might kinda sorta love her. — Gena Showalter

Poor Craw?" Ben retorted. "Poor Rory! Craw and Ari curse worse than a trucker shagging a sailor. — Amy Lane

You look worse today than you did when you had two black
eyes."
"Why, thank you, Tyler. You always say the sweetest things. — Gwen Hayes

I don't know which is worse," Cassidy mused, "when people laugh at things that aren't funny, or when they don't laugh at things that are. — Robyn Schneider

There are worse occupations in this world than feeling a woman's pulse. — Laurence Sterne

It's awful bad luck to bring a woman aboard the ship."
"It's awful worse luck not to. — Johnny Depp

Perspective is a funny thing. You think your back is to the wall, then something worse corners you, and the first threat looks puny in comparison. — Karen Marie Moning

Remember, no matter how hard your life is right now, it would be worse if a song by Chicago was playing. — Andy Borowitz

Funny, how just when you think life can't possibly get any worse it suddenly does. — Douglas Adams