Funny Girl Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about Funny Girl

Funny Girl Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Girl quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I'm meeting the attic before I meet the girl. — Colleen Hoover

Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, 'How's it going with that girl?' 'One day at a time, man.' — Adam Ferrara

Strippers should be role-models for little girls. If only for the fact that they wax their assholes. — Sarah Silverman

If a guy doesn't like a funny girl, something is wrong with him. — Bill Hader

Their vaginas were just ships passing in the night, stopping to pick up every dirty sailor. — K.F. Germaine

Vomit and shit, even your own, stink. — Sheeja Jose

He glanced up once, eyes bored. Please stop talking. I'm trying to eat. — Kate Avery Ellison

Everyone loves a kick-ass girl. (Well- maybe not her enemies, but you know what I mean.) — Sarah Cross

I once went out with this girl, she was no bargain either, she showed up with pigtails under her arms. — Rodney Dangerfield

One should never give up on hope. Unless that's the name of the girl who cheated on you in which case, yeah, give her up. — Carroll Bryant

I was the girl with cake batter in her hair, egg on her shirt and her foot in her mouth. Always. — Kari Luna

The shooting of the guns, that was kind of funny, because rolling a cigarette and shooting a gun aren't like normal things for a 13-year old girl! — Hailee Steinfeld

Oh baby", Madoc groaned to the girl next to him. "Snickers ain't the only thing king sized. — Penelope Douglas

Who are you?' Gaia gasped.
The girl froze for a moment.
Looked at her. Smiled and said, 'Who am I? I'm the Breeze, bitch! — Michael Grant

The sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless, bottomless', I went inside and there was nobody there! — Rodney Dangerfield

Every other girl in school thinks you're the hottest thing since
the microwave. — Linda Kage

Or, as Nikolas had said, in tones of admiration, She can tell you to go to hell in a way that will send you running of to pack your bags. — Mercedes Lackey

That's the problem with best friends. Sometimes they know you better than you know yourself. — Cecily Von Ziegesar

Anything above 40 is a little too old for me. I just look for a girl who is funny and has nice eyes and a smile. — Justin Bieber

You said she's a senior? Babe we're ALL crazy. — Cecily Von Ziegesar

Minimalism is a girl's best asset, blend tones, smudge hard outlines; if all else fails; Photoshop it. — Judith Chambers

The girls are beautiful in Hollywood - and enough silicon to caulk a sink. — Adam Ferrara

The girl may have been tiny, but everything about her said, I'm not scared of you, so piss off. — Christine Manzari

A real girl isn't perfect and a perfect girl isn't real. — Harry Styles

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid. — Hedy Lamarr

A boy and a girl started dating after he backed his car into hers. They met by accident. — Adam Young

Now there's a girl I don't want to mess with' - or at least, that's what I would think if I had a chronic fear of freakishly nice people. — Nenia Campbell

Sometimes girls act all TNT Network because they know drama. That's when guys get all TBS around you because we think it's very funny. — Dane Cook

Maxon: "To be clear, no one agrees with you."
America: "To be clear, I don't care. — Kiera Cass

She's cute, I thought, but you don't need to like a girl who treats you like you're ten: You've already got a mom. — John Green

Asshole FBI agents that want to shoot Girl Scouts. — C.J. Roberts

Besides, what do I know about being a wife? There are much more important qualities to have than a docile disposition. — C.J. Redwine

I am the ultimate California girl, which is funny, being that I'm Canadian. — Pamela Anderson

It's funny how you can go from hating a girl to maybe liking her, maybe liking her a lot, just because she shows a little interest in you. — Louis Sachar

Life is what you make it. Unless some guy finds you with his girl. Then the ball's pretty much in his court. — Lois Greiman

Instead I sounded like a little girl on her first day of kindergarten. My name is Bee, and I like coloring and horsies. — Kate Avery Ellison

But a movie doesn't have to be good if it has Hugh Jackman. — Jesse Andrews

My dad wears girls' clothes - it's so funny. Sometimes I see him and I'm like, 'Nice shirt!,' because it's from my closet. — Liv Tyler

Remember. Make him cry uncle.
Cry uncle, my posterior. I'm going to make him cry like a girl who broke her mom's designer heels at the prom. — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Some girls want to be a princess when they grow up. I wanted to be in a bad bitch girl gang. — Natalia Kills

I like a funny girl. Smart. Talented. I like someone who is good at music - that always intrigues me. — Tom Felton

Never in his life had he hit a girl, nor would he. But, right now, he wanted to kick that NSA cutie in the ass cheek. — Shane Scollins

I like girls who are intelligent, somewhat funny, and pretty with a nice personality. — Leonardo DiCaprio

The girl has a funny way of romanticizing things. — Karen Russell

It's funny, he said, have you ever thought that a girl's clothes cost more than the girl inside them? — Jean Rhys

Yes! Yes! There's the attitude. Where was that girl during the race? Off getting sushi? — Doug Solter

He caught her staring and smiled-not a conceited I-work-out-and-have-a-great-body type smirk, but more of a I'm-a-boy; you're-a-girl; life is good. — Cherise Sinclair

The human body is the best work of art. — Jess C. Scott

I like doing a funny show where I don't have to act and fall in love with a girl. — Norm MacDonald

One doesn't interrupt a beautiful girl unless one is going to be funny. — Brent Weeks

I'm in a situation with this girl that's as hopeless as overthrowing the Bush administration. — Aziz Ansari

We took pictures of the native girls, but they weren't developed ... But we're going back next week. — Groucho Marx

After making love I said to my girl, "Was it good for you too?" And she said, "I don't think this was good for anybody." — Garry Shandling

Wouldn't it be funny if that girl got raped by like, 5 guys right now? Like right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped her ... — Daniel Tosh

I like girls to be wild but at the same time beautifully brought up and very funny. — Karl Lagerfeld

There is strong. There is Army Strong. And then there is Army Wife Strong. — Aditi Mathur Kumar

I can't decide whether I'm a good girl wrapped up in a bad girl, or if I'm a bad girl wrapped up in a good girl. And that's how I know I'm a woman! — C. JoyBell C.

We all men want a bad girl friend, but a good wife. — M.F. Moonzajer

What kind of good deeds? Like Girl Scouts? Because I got kicked out of Brownies and they won't give me another chance to keep my clothes on at camp. — Haven Kimmel

I wanted to be that quirky girl who writes funny songs that still have meaning. — Katy Perry

I knew a girl so ugly, she had a face like a saint-a Saint Bernard! — Rodney Dangerfield

Tip#27

Kiss a girl if you're a female,

If you're a single male kiss a Guy

(Idea)
It's fun to offend society ~ — Hazel Cartwright

Say, Cuttino. What are those Godawful clothes you're wearing? Man, this ain't Rhode Island anymore. You're in the NBA. The girls have teeth here. — Charles Barkley

When I first started I was always known as The Girl on the Sitcom with the Funny Voice. — Julie Benz

I appreciate humor so much, but I'm actually not a funny girl. — Emmanuelle Chriqui

what with the follies and an indecent proposal it's been quite a night — Barbra Streisand

The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn't have. — Will Ferrell

He really needed to stop being so hot while his hands were on me. — Veronica Blade

Don't make being a girl or a victim part of your stand-up act. If you encounter sexism in the business, don't bring it on stage; it's not funny. — Jen Kirkman

Girl who sit on Judge's lap get honorable discharge. — Confucius

Accents are funny. It sets me apart from the other girls doing comedy. It gives me more - how do you say? - pop-oo-laaarrrity. — Sofia Vergara

Everyone thinks softball is a girl's game. But you only think that until you get hit with it on a line drive. — Jerry Smith

It would be pretty funny to see a Beverly Hills white girl with mad rap skills. — Tori Spelling

I was raped by a doctor. Which is, you know, so bittersweet for a Jewish girl. — Sarah Silverman

I was often the only white girl in the Indian dance class. That felt funny, but doing Indian dance was great. — Roselee Goldberg

I pat her on the head. "Oh, naive little Kitten. Dear, foolish girl. This cookie is worth all this and more. Sit or you will not partake. — Jenny Han

You've got the holy trinity of what a girl wants, she said. Cute, smart, funny. I don't think you realize that. — Alex Bradley

And there's no "I love you" message because Steve Ovett has married the girl — David Coleman

It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about being a girl, it's about being a funny comic. — Iliza Shlesinger

I've known for quite a while that I was a funny girl. — Niecy Nash

(Annabeth says most of that salt water is in my head. Very funny, Wise Girl.) Anyway, — Rick Riordan

When I go to a bar, I don't go looking for a girl who knows the capital of Maine. — David Brenner

He's quite extraordinary with his moves and spins. I think he was a baton girl in a past life [on his co-star Hayden Christensen]. — Ewan McGregor

I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her. — Rodney Dangerfield

You may say what you want to, but in my opinion she had more sand in her than any girl I ever see; in my opinion she was just full of sand. — Mark Twain

I went out with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number ... She looked great going down the stairs. — Milton Jones

She says with that misty
far-away look in her eyes. Like conjunctivitis. — Aditi Mathur Kumar

I want to be in 'Funny Girl.' And I want Ryan Murphy to direct it. — Lea Michele

A funny and insightful read, which every single girl can relate to. — Take A Break

He is my dog, Toto," answered Dorothy.
"Is he made of tin, or stuffed?" asked the Lion.
"Neither. He's a
a
a meat dog," said the girl. — L. Frank Baum

I'm at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to. — Rodney Dangerfield

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. — Albert Einstein

MC is a funny girl and always makes me laugh no matter what. I love her! — Missy Elliot

A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.' — Mike Birbiglia

Man, my girl is one tough chick when she wants to be. I wonder if it has something to do with those
big, comfy granny panties she's got on. — Simone Elkeles

Here's the thing. I met this girl, this beautiful woman who's unlike anyone I've ever met. She's funny, and brave — Denise Grover Swank

I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now." — Rodney Dangerfield

You should never be mean to other girls. I don't care what grade you're in. Be nice to people until you're my age ... and you have your own TV show. — Chelsea Handler

I used to drink wine. This girl asked me, "Doesn't wine give you a headache?" "Yeah, eventually, but the first and the middle part are amazing!" — Mitch Hedberg

It was funny how one afternoon with a best friend could set a girl right. — Libba Bray