English Funny Quotes: top 36 famous quotes about English Funny

English Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational English Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I want very much to be back in the caul, on my back in the dark forever. — Samuel Beckett

So I went to bed, full, happy, and caring nothing for all the hurt of all the englished Welshmen that ever festered upon a proud land — Richard Llewellyn

The English have a miraculous power of turning wine into water. — Oscar Wilde

When I went to London, they told me I spoke with a funny accent - English with a Chinese accent. — Jean-Georges Vongerichten

The East End of Glasgow is like the Olympics. Lots of foriegners in tracksuits struggling to speak English. — Frankie Boyle

You mustn't let men drive you to mangling the English language, no matter how sweet they are. — Marisa De Los Santos

Your blessing in life is when you find the torture you're comfortable with. — Jerry Seinfeld

[ ... ] and I switched to English literature, where so many frustrated poets end as pipe-smoking teachers in tweeds. — Vladimir Nabokov

It's funny how a film about a murderous old English toff can help you. — Jim Broadbent

water. Bear Creek is the cause the — Carolyn Brown

I have an all-Japanese design team, and none of them speak English. So it's often funny and surprising how my ideas end up lost in translation. — Pharrell Williams

Continental people have a sex life; the English have hot-water bottles. — George Mikes

If a playwright is funny, the English look for a serious message, and if he's serious, they look for a joke. — Sacha Guitry

I was not born with English in my pocket. — Santosh Kalwar

Me neither," Shane put in. "Homie don't play that."
"I wonder, sometimes, if your generation speaks English at all," Amelie said. — Rachel Caine

We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have to get rid of dictators,' but he's pretty much one himself. — Robin Williams

Seeing the way his trousers clung to those most English parts. — Seth Grahame-Smith

Self-reverence, self-knowledge, self-control; these three alone lead one to sovereign power. — Alfred Lord Tennyson

I hope God speaks English. If I get up to heaven and have to point at a menu, I'm gonna be pissed. — Daniel Tosh

I want to get into voice-overs. — Carnie Wilson

Fine's a funny word, don't you think? I don't think there's another like it in the English language that says so much while actually saying so little. — Emma Chase

Because you've been on dates where y'know, you forget to open your eyes and wear pants and speak English. — David Cross

I don't believe in failing. I have dignity. — Alejandro Jodorowsky

You do your job, you get your work done at the rink and then you go home. The big thing is figuring out what you're going to do the rest of the day. — Dany Heatley

Everything in English sounded funny. — Richard House

Richard Burton had a tremendous passion for the English language, especially the spoken and written word — Frank Bough

My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English. — Margaret Cho

John Locke invented common sense, and only Englishmen have had it ever since! — Bertrand Russell

How can we win souls for Christ? We must continue to preach the gospel of salvation. — Lailah Gifty Akita

Virtue makes for a cold bed. — Ava Zavora

If water was beer I'd be a teetotaler — Benny Bellamacina

This separation happened for a reason, this esason is for our own good; God is just positioning us. — Euginia Herlihy

I'm English. We're about as tactful as a hot poker up the bum, most of the time. — L.H. Thomson

A woman who is praying and a woman who is having fun, they both say " Oh My God", the only difference is how they pronounce it. — M.F. Moonzajer

Love is simple, if you allow it to be simple. Julian to Hannah, Take A Chance — Alison Wong

I beg your pardon; I am drunk without a drink. English wine & words are vulnerable to every man. — Santosh Kalwar