Ellen Degeneres Funny Quotes
Collection of top 27 famous quotes about Ellen Degeneres Funny
Ellen Degeneres Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Ellen Degeneres Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
Normally, I try not to pay attention to my haters, but this time I'd like to talk about it, because my haters are my motivators.
— Ellen DeGeneres
You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
— Ellen DeGeneres
It's funny how cucumber water can taste so much better than pickle juice, even though they come from the same source.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. It must stand for: 'Ohhh my God, you're thin.'
— Ellen DeGeneres
It is better to give than to receive." - Liars
— Ellen DeGeneres
I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I'm glad I'm funny. I'm glad I make people happy, because that's very important. But I'm proud to be known as a kind person.
— Ellen DeGeneres
All we have is here and now. That's why procrastination feels so right. Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution.
— Ellen DeGeneres
My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Come on, if you don't win tonight it doesn't mean you're not a good person, it just means you're not a good actor.
— Ellen DeGeneres
You never know what funny can do.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Why is it that when you wipe up dust its called dusting but when you wipe up a spill its not called spilling? Just something to think about.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I didn't go to college at all, any college, and I'm not saying you wasted your time or money, but look at me, I'm a huge celebrity.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Have you ever thought about toothpaste? Ellen has! And she makes a point about all of the types of toothpaste that Colgate offers!
— Ellen DeGeneres
I wonder what will happen if i put a hand cream on my feet, will they get confused and start clapping?
— Ellen DeGeneres
Leaning forward in your chair when someone is trying to squeeze behind you isn't enough. You also have to move the chair.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.
— Ellen DeGeneres
When there's time for whistling, there's a lot of time on a show.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises.
— Ellen DeGeneres
What did the letter O say to Q? Dude, your dikk is hanging out.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Really, he called me that? Ellen DeGenerate? I've been getting that since fourth grade. I guess I'm happy I could give him work.
— Ellen DeGeneres
