Days Off Funny Quotes
Collection of top 34 famous quotes about Days Off Funny
Days Off Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Days Off Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
I have an idea for sweatshops: air conditioning! That's simple. 14 year old boys working twelve hour days? "Yeah, but they're comfortable!"
— Mitch Hedberg
That's what gets converts these days," Baron said. "It's a buyers' market in apocalypse. What's hot in heresy's Armageddon.
— China Mieville
It's funny reading about how I behaved in the days before memories formed. So thanks for that input, Mom and Dad - wasn't so bad after all.
— Connor Franta
I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning ... That can keep me awake for days..
— Billy Connolly
I saw 28 Days. I don't remember rehab being like a day camp or being that funny. Rehab is a dumping ground. It's a big landfill.
— Charlie Sheen
My wife went to a beauty parlor and got a mudpack; for two days she looked nice, then the mud fell off.
— Chic Murray
A lot of my early pictures are, I think, quite funny. And these days I tend to look for comedy more and more.
— Helen Levitt
I was of course discussing the book of Leviticus. I don't know why your mind is so filthy these days, Bingley.— Marsha Altman
Can I fetch you something, madam? A cup of tea?'In the old days she'd have been 'miss' and he'd have offered her a cocktail. — Sara Sheridan
In those days the best painkiller was ice; it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
— George Burns
Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
— Spike Milligan
It sometimes takes days, even weeks, before a dog's nerves tire. In the case of terriers it can run into months.
— E.B. White
I just looked at the calendar and realized- my days are numbered
— Johnny Moscato
I had pecs for about two days. Everyone would hate me. Just look at me walking around with my little peacoat on. My little customized pea coat.
— Robert Pattinson
Funny how days are like that. Some days start off rubbish and get worse as they go on, others start well and get better.
— Chris Higgins
I'm saving my sick days for when I'm feeling better.
— Salma Hayek
After two days in the hospital, I turn to the nurse.
— W.C. Fields
I survived a divorce, no children and come to Paris three days per week. My cat ran away on a love adventure; don't know when he will be back.
— Tionne Rogers
Normally, she would never wish a head injury on anyone, but it might make her days in Archival Studies a bit easier.
— Jaleigh Johnson
Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals.
— Robert Orben
Serkin was so sick he almost died for three days.
— Eugene Ormandy
I gave him a compliment! All right, I told him he probably would've made, like, a really expensive slave in the, like, in the olden-timey days.
— Sarah Silverman
Some days you were the bitch and some days you were shit that came out of the bitch's toy poodle. Today was one of those days I was the latter.
— Stacey Marie Brown
A travel agent told I could spend 7 nights in HAWAII no days just nights.
— Rodney Dangerfield
