Birbiglia Mike Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about Birbiglia Mike

Birbiglia Mike Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Birbiglia Mike quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Shooting a movie isn't good for a sleep disorder. — Mike Birbiglia

I think serious situations actually make for the best kind of belly laughs. But they're also the hardest to convert into comedy at the outset. — Mike Birbiglia

I went to a funeral recently, and they handed out Kleenex before the funeral. Which I thought was cocky. — Mike Birbiglia

They really cut to the chase in the urologist's examination room, and I tried to laugh. If this office were a movie, it would have been rated R. — Mike Birbiglia

I shouldn't say bad things about the illiterate, though..I should write it. That way they won't find out. — Mike Birbiglia

I just don't give off a great first impression. — Mike Birbiglia

I've found, being in Los Angeles, it's like living in a live-action Planet Hollywood. — Mike Birbiglia

Essentially, retweets are like laughs. — Mike Birbiglia

The economy of film forces you to make choices. — Mike Birbiglia

I was raised Catholic, and then I kind of wandered away somewhere in high-school. I never got confirmed, which is a big deal. — Mike Birbiglia

Falling in love is a completely transcendent experience. It's like eating pizza-flavored ice cream — Mike Birbiglia

Sometimes I take this women's exercise class called Core Fusion at a place called Exhale. I shouldn't say it's a women's class. There's maybe two men. — Mike Birbiglia

I love pizza so much, I would marry pizza, but it would just be an elaborate ploy to eat her whole family at the reception. — Mike Birbiglia

The people who are the worst at news, who kind of engage in what I call the World Wrestling of news, have kind of set the bar for where news is. — Mike Birbiglia

I feel like everyone wants to make a movie that they feel passionate about watching. — Mike Birbiglia

I didn't realize how good I was with computers until I met my parents. — Mike Birbiglia

Some people come up to me and say "You know, in Italy, it's pronounced Ber-beel-lia" And I say "Well, here in America, you're annoying ... " — Mike Birbiglia

I was an altar boy as a kid. And the answer is no. — Mike Birbiglia

Prose is all about embellishing and describing. — Mike Birbiglia

When you're in high school, you can't even imagine the concept of what the rest of your life even means. — Mike Birbiglia

In some sense, Comedy Central has made their audience into comedy connoisseurs. — Mike Birbiglia

Jokes are so personal, and they bring us together in so many ways. — Mike Birbiglia

I'm a comedian, and the other comedians are played by comedians, the same way that in 'Once' there are the musicians that hang out together. — Mike Birbiglia

Nothing that you want ever is what you think it is. — Mike Birbiglia

I love pizza. I want to marry it, but it would just be to eat her family at the wedding. — Mike Birbiglia

I'd much rather try and fail than talk about trying. — Mike Birbiglia

If you tried to sell Mike Birbiglia as a concept, no one would buy it. — Mike Birbiglia

Film is so immersive. — Mike Birbiglia

Backup dancers are completely respectable. They're the studio musicians of dance. — Mike Birbiglia

Dopamine is a chemical released in your brain and your body when you sleep that paralyzes your body so you don't act out your dreams. — Mike Birbiglia

Sometimes, when you want to be in a place so badly, you'll do anything. — Mike Birbiglia

I don't smoke a lot of pot anymore. No one wants to hang around a guy who ends every sentence with, "Do you guys hate me?" — Mike Birbiglia

What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math. — Mike Birbiglia

The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial. — Mike Birbiglia

I drank the Kool-Aid of being a network star. Once it didn't happen, I realized it wasn't the best version of my comedy. — Mike Birbiglia

Sex and pizza, they say, are similar. When it's good, it's good. When it's bad, you get it on your shirt. — Mike Birbiglia

I'm incapable of feeling any joy. — Mike Birbiglia

You can't go to medical school and come out and be like, 'I'm going to be a dog catcher.' That would be so pointless. — Mike Birbiglia

Everything about starting out in comedy is pride-swallowing, from handing out fliers to bombing in front of audiences. — Mike Birbiglia

I always live tweet 'SNL.' — Mike Birbiglia

You need to know what doesn't work to know what works. It's especially true in improv and stand-up. — Mike Birbiglia

Saturday night is perfect for writers because other people have plans. — Mike Birbiglia

I'm a compulsive everything. — Mike Birbiglia

Creepy people do the things that decent people want to do, but have decided are not a great idea. — Mike Birbiglia

I find my fans are really funny people. Most comedians can't say that about their fans. — Mike Birbiglia

The one thing you're most reluctant to tell. That's where the comedy is. — Mike Birbiglia

I never looked at my parents' marriage or really anyone who had been married more than 30 years and thought, 'I gotta get me some of that!' — Mike Birbiglia

What I always studied in screenwriting from my mentor John Glavin was that the most interesting characters are characters with shades of gray. — Mike Birbiglia

I always try to attack the most honest issues I can in my comedy. — Mike Birbiglia

I'm walking out my door to get like a Snapple, and someone's like 'yo man, you want to buy some heroin?' 'No ... got any Snapple?' — Mike Birbiglia

When I was growing up, I didn't know who Jewish people were, what it was to be Jewish. — Mike Birbiglia

I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy. — Mike Birbiglia

Sometimes people say, 'You're the best at digressions.' And that's actually a real compliment to me. — Mike Birbiglia

I've yet to write a stand-up show that isn't autobiographical. — Mike Birbiglia

The ability to workshop in stand-up comedy is incomparable to any art form, in my opinion. — Mike Birbiglia

You know the expression, 'You're only as sick as your secrets?' I believe that, and I think I try to have my work live by that to a degree. — Mike Birbiglia

One of my favorite comedies of all time is 'Terms of Endearment;' that's my pace. — Mike Birbiglia

Making a film is beyond exciting. It's so exciting, it's exhausting. — Mike Birbiglia

Sometimes you'll have a heckler who's actually attempting to be supportive, but you don't realize it. Their way of expressing it is kind of confusing. — Mike Birbiglia

With a monologue, you can be unendingly elliptical. — Mike Birbiglia

I love Valentine's Day. When you're a kid everyone gets a Valentine. It's like 'TO TIM, NICE PANTS, LOVE SCOTT'. It's Valentines galore! — Mike Birbiglia

I'm a big fan of pastries the size of a baby that contain enough calories for a year. That seems like an effective use of time. — Mike Birbiglia

When I met my wife, I was a working comic, so the first week we went out, she saw me perform, and it was very clear what I do. — Mike Birbiglia

I love Jimmy Fallon and Jimmy Kimmel. — Mike Birbiglia

You have to be delusional to be a comedian. — Mike Birbiglia

People come to my shows on purpose as opposed to coming to a 'comedy show.' Which was always my goal. — Mike Birbiglia

Awkwardness and feeling alienated are always going to be a part of comedy. — Mike Birbiglia

My dad goes through war novels like I go through boxes of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. — Mike Birbiglia

When I go to bed at night, I wear a sleeping bag. And for a long time, I wore mittens so that I couldn't open the sleeping bag. — Mike Birbiglia

When I moved to New York, I was wide-eyed. I was nice to everyone, which comedians hate. — Mike Birbiglia

You can always tell who went to catholic school, because they're atheists. — Mike Birbiglia

The moment I walk into a room, I have kind of like the Terminator's tracking system for where the food is, and I can get there immediately. — Mike Birbiglia

I used to think I was a little unstable, and then I met every girl I've ever dated. — Mike Birbiglia

I love 'Bullets Over Broadway,' but I'm pretty sure Woody Allen hasn't killed somebody. — Mike Birbiglia

I sometimes think of not doing Twitter or Facebook anymore, but that's how people find their favorite bands and comedians. — Mike Birbiglia

One of my favourite movies is 'Annie Hall' because it's about the silver lining of the break-up. — Mike Birbiglia

Fortunately, I don't talk about politics on stage. — Mike Birbiglia

How many people do you know who have thrown up on the Scrambler or a carnival ride? A lot of people, is the answer. — Mike Birbiglia

People are making better and better small budge independent films these days. — Mike Birbiglia

High school is not unlike a Mormon fundamentalist cult where the women are claimed by the older and more powerful. — Mike Birbiglia

Nobody knows the life of the working comic. — Mike Birbiglia

I feel that marriage can lead to the ultimate rejection and failure and divorce and things we all fear. — Mike Birbiglia

Alienation, I suppose, can't be hackneyed because it will always exist. — Mike Birbiglia

A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.' — Mike Birbiglia

The list of fun and easily fixed brain diseases is very short. — Mike Birbiglia

You know the quickest way to get comedians to hate you? Do Letterman at age 24. — Mike Birbiglia

Comedy is tragedy plus time, but the time is different for everybody. — Mike Birbiglia

I like films that are so funny, dramatic and lifelike simultaneously, that you are laughing and cringing simultaneously all throughout the film. — Mike Birbiglia

I take the subway four times a day, or close to it. I just love the subway! My grandfather worked as an electrician when they were digging the subway. — Mike Birbiglia

I almost can't even put to words how happy I am that I got married. — Mike Birbiglia

I got an E-Trade account. Turns out I can turn $1,000 into $420 in less than a week. Sure, I had to pay some fees ... — Mike Birbiglia

Pain is funnier than love. — Mike Birbiglia

I'm going to end up making twenty films if people let me. — Mike Birbiglia

Once you know how to make a movie, you can't not make a movie. — Mike Birbiglia

My family isn't really Italian. We're more like Olive Garden Italian. — Mike Birbiglia

Sometimes my fans are too nice. — Mike Birbiglia

I couldn't recommend more that people put themselves in a situation where they can see a lot of work that they admire, and for free. — Mike Birbiglia

Louis C.K. directs his show, which is very much like a series of short films. — Mike Birbiglia

Once you start writing something obsessively, it's almost like someone has to rip it from your hands in order for you to put it down. — Mike Birbiglia

'Terminator 2' is so good. I love it. — Mike Birbiglia