Age Humor Quotes
Collection of top 92 famous quotes about Age Humor
Age Humor Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Age Humor quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
New Age eccentricity could only take you so far before you wandered into mentally ill territory.
— M.M. McLaughlin
As for the age of electronics, Selena, I really don't want to get personal with something that comes with a warning label and batteries. (Grace)
— Sherrilyn Kenyon
Women do not lie about their age. In fact, no woman ever has, its just that memory is the first thing to go.
— David C. Holley
He's half my ex-husband's age, but twice as energetic when we have sex. And twice as grateful afterwards.
— Barbara Taylor Bradford
Walk your own path and be yourself
— Joanne Nussbaum
I was only twenty-five, much to young to die. Probably about the right age to become a complete hypochondriac, however.
— Kylie Scott
At a certain age almost all the questions a person asks him or herself are really just about one thing: how should you live your life?
— Fredrik Backman
We don't ask when people age out of singing, or eating ice cream; why would we stop making love?
— Ashton Applewhite
Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.
— Ogden Nash
One should never make one's debut with a scandal. One should reserve that to give an interest to one's old age.
— Oscar Wilde
I am a great believe that your humor is developed at a very early age and it doesn't ever change.
— James Bobin
There are very few humorists who have written first-rate humor after they've become elderly.
— Richard Armour
Too young to care; Too old to change.
— Hafsa Shah
Just remember, when you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed.
— Charles M. Schulz
Avoid the stage of old age sit in the audience, it's all the rage
— Benny Bellamacina
Sleeping with a man half your age can be exhausting, but if it's too much for him you can always find a younger man.
— Barbara Taylor Bradford
When I came out of anesthesia, I wanted two things: my husband and my dog. They wouldn't let the dog in the recovery room.
— Sandy Nathan
I won't say I was slow developer, but our teacher was quite pleased to have someone her own age in the class to talk to.
— Chic Murray
Take care of the elderly people.
— Lailah Gifty Akita
Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom
— George Carlin
Peter, you're twelve years old. I'm ten. They have a word for people our age. They call us children and they treat us like mice.
— Orson Scott Card
Moderation is the key to old age and the doorway to boredom
— Benny Bellamacina
Young men speak about the future because they have no past, and old men speak of the past because they have no future.
— Boyd K. Packer
I've always felt comfortable amongst the horrors. I married your uncle Gerard, after all.
— Melika Dannese Lux
You could have heard a bee fluff
— S.W. Lothian
There is only one cure for grey hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
— P.G. Wodehouse
We can never skip growing old. As we grow older, we understand old things and things of old times better!
— Ernest Agyemang Yeboah
Once we were young, now we are adult.
— Lailah Gifty Akita
Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you're aboard there's nothing you can do.
— Golda Meir
She looks like a very young old person, or a very old young person; but then, she's looked that way ever since she was two.
— Margaret Atwood
Mamma says she is quite certain that "how old is too old?" is not a question known to the Lord.
— Annette Bridges
Two or three years from now thirty won't look so senile.
— Warner Fabian
I Didn't Ask to Be a Senior Citizen (I Was Drafted)
— Doug Jensen
Speak kindly to with adult women as you would to your mother.
— Lailah Gifty Akita
They should raise the alcohol age to 60, so at least you'd have something to look forward to at this point.
— Doug Stanhope
How young can you die of old age?
— Steven Wright
As we grow older, our bodies get shorter and our anecdotes longer.
— Robert Quillen
It must be quite a shock to suddenly find out you're pregnant, seventeen times over - at your age, too.
— Lois McMaster Bujold
Plans?" he snorted. "I'm ninety-three years old! Who in tarnation makes plans at my age? I could stop breathin' any minute now.
— Linda Howard
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year.I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety. — Steven Wright
It is perhaps life's greatest accomplishment to live to old age, maintaining one's wits, one's sense of humor, one's health, and one's charm.
— Yehudi Menuhin
My mother always used to say, The older you get, the better you get. Unless you're a banana.
— Betty White
I've always felt there are two things a woman should never do after the age of thirty-five: stand in natural light and have a baby ...
— Erma Bombeck
I unwrapped my love for her like one might unwrap leftovers. Gotta eat up the old stuff first, as a cannibal might say in a retirement home.
— Dark Jar Tin Zoo
Treasure the beauty of youthful life and the wisdom of adulthood.
— Lailah Gifty Akita
Old age is not just for grown up's
— Benny Bellamacina
By gad, is that you, Ainswood? I haven't seen you in a dog's age. How's the gout? Still troubling you?
— Loretta Chase
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.
— Don Marquis
It's in a can. It's good forever.
— Renata Suerth
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the heck she is.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Never get old. It's a ridiculously uncomfortable process Ath Creator should be made to find a cure for.
— Janny Wurts
I wish I was 18 again, not that I don't like the age I'm at right now, but at 18yrs old I knew everything!
— Michael Nuccio
We laughed harder than the humor deserved, which goes to show you no matter your age, you're closer to adolescence than you think.
— Lorna Landvik
Thirtythe promise of a decade of loneliness, a thinning list of single men to know, a thinning brief-case of enthusiasm, thinning hair. — F Scott Fitzgerald
Face it girls. I'm older and I have more insurance.
— Fannie Flagg
Wearing glasses for reading meant surrendering to old age without the least bit of a fight.
— Andrea Camilleri
DARK AGE LOSERS PROBLY USED TURNIPS FOR IPHONES LOL!!!!
— Charlie Brooker
Do you remember what I forgot?
— Erica Goros
Self-awareness: it is one of the chief bonuses of advancing age. It is our consolation prize.
— Louise Doughty
Fortunately for Alan's sake, Frank preferred beauty over age so I had no need to defend my territory.
— Nicole Castle
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
— George Burns
I trust that age doth not wither nor custom stale my infinite variety.
— Arthur Conan Doyle
There was no respect for youth when I was young, and now that I am old, there is no respect for age. I missed it coming and going.
— J.B. Priestley
The bonds of friendship dwindle with age, Oliver. But a little blackmail lasts forever.
— Stephen Hunt
You are old and grey," she teased."And you're never too immortal for a spanking," he shot back ... — Dianna Hardy
You'd be surprised how many people in the modern age no longer fear zombies as much as teletubies.
— Sherrilyn Kenyon
At least in the Gilded Age age they gilded shit.
— Josh Bazell
Pheromones didn't care about tomorrow. They didn't care about education or employment or age.
— Tracy Brogan
