Peter Cook Quotes

One of the ways to avoid being beaten by the system is to laugh at it.

The garden of Eden was a boggy swamp just south of Croydon. You can see it over there.

I would much prefer to be a judge than a coal miner because of the absence of falling coal.

Job was what you'd technically describe as a loony.

I met a man at a party. He said "I'm writing a novel" I said "Oh really? Neither am I.

I didn't know dirty words could be done that artfully.

I am very interested in the Universe - I am specialising in the Universe and all that surrounds it.

I went to the University of Life and was chucked out.

We exchanged many frank words in our respective languages.

The thing that makes you know that Vernon Ward is a good painter is if you look at his ducks, you can see the eyes follow you around the room.

Now I tell you the downside of this is you feel awful, but the upside is you feel terrific.

I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly

Everything I've ever told you, including this, is a lie.

You realize that suicide's a criminal offense - In less enlightened times they'd have hung you for it.

As I looked out into the night sky, across all those infinite stars, it made me realize how insignificant they are.

I am blind
but I am able to read thanks to a wonderful new system known as 'broil' ... I'm sorry, I'll just feel that again.