Gilbert Gottfried quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Gilbert Gottfried

Gilbert Gottfried Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Gilbert Gottfried on Wise Famous Quotes.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.

I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: If the police ever try to pick me up, Michael Jackson told me I can hide out at his house.

If the police ever try to pick me up, Michael Jackson told me I can hide out at his house.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I'm a very anti-vacation person. Because I'm always getting on planes for work, to me, a vacation is when I don't have to get on a plane.

I'm a very anti-vacation person. Because I'm always getting on planes for work, to me, a vacation is when I don't have to get on a plane.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I'm known for my slightly inappropriate remarks.

I'm known for my slightly inappropriate remarks.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Reality TV has totally destroyed soap operas. They're gone. They used to be the biggest thing in the world - they're gone.

Reality TV has totally destroyed soap operas. They're gone. They used to be the biggest thing in the world - they're gone.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Every time something pops in my head, I think twice about it and I do it anyway.

Every time something pops in my head, I think twice about it and I do it anyway.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I'm used to explaining to people why my jokes were funny.

I'm used to explaining to people why my jokes were funny.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I've never been one of those who wanted to fill my calendar up 90 percent of the time.

I've never been one of those who wanted to fill my calendar up 90 percent of the time.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I personally think Miles Davis is a lot funnier than me. And he's working more.

I personally think Miles Davis is a lot funnier than me. And he's working more.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I always try to avoid anything that has to do with my life.

I always try to avoid anything that has to do with my life.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: If someone says that I'm the best at anything, I always just agree with them. I'm certainly not gonna argue.

If someone says that I'm the best at anything, I always just agree with them. I'm certainly not gonna argue.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: There definitely is exposure in reality shows, but the exposure will basically get you more reality shows.

There definitely is exposure in reality shows, but the exposure will basically get you more reality shows.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: The joy of the roasts is to watch people get hurt and offended, and then have to laugh to pretend they're a good sport.

The joy of the roasts is to watch people get hurt and offended, and then have to laugh to pretend they're a good sport.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Nothing can help my comedy.

Nothing can help my comedy.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: What do Japanese Jews love to eat? Hebrew National Tsunami.

What do Japanese Jews love to eat? Hebrew National Tsunami.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: If you're anything like me, I feel sorry for your friends and family.

If you're anything like me, I feel sorry for your friends and family.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I think a lot of people have too much time on their hands.

I think a lot of people have too much time on their hands.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.

In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I would show up at a party for Al Qaeda if you said there's going to be a dinner.

I would show up at a party for Al Qaeda if you said there's going to be a dinner.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Well, I'm eventually gonna take the Daryl Hannah parts.

Well, I'm eventually gonna take the Daryl Hannah parts.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Unfortunately, I've never been mistaken as Johnny Depp.

Unfortunately, I've never been mistaken as Johnny Depp.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: If you have the Old Testament at home, if you flip the corner pages, you can see Jesus riding a horse.

If you have the Old Testament at home, if you flip the corner pages, you can see Jesus riding a horse.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: No, generally I think influence is used as a nice word for plagiarism.

No, generally I think influence is used as a nice word for plagiarism.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I think of Alan Thicke as Perry Como without the excitement.

I think of Alan Thicke as Perry Como without the excitement.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: If I could cause world peace by taking someone out to lunch, I'd go, 'Well, war isn't that terrible.'

If I could cause world peace by taking someone out to lunch, I'd go, 'Well, war isn't that terrible.'

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: With the Internet, if you erase something it just means you have to spend another half-minute to find it.

With the Internet, if you erase something it just means you have to spend another half-minute to find it.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: If they'd wanted a nice parrot, they wouldn't have asked for me.

If they'd wanted a nice parrot, they wouldn't have asked for me.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I'd make Jack Benny look like a philanthropist.

I'd make Jack Benny look like a philanthropist.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I understand being less sexy than Osama bin Laden, but not less sexy than Carrot Top. That, I find offensive.

I understand being less sexy than Osama bin Laden, but not less sexy than Carrot Top. That, I find offensive.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: When you watch Robin Williams, you can see a lot of Jonathan Winters. Robin is the first one to admit that; he worshiped Jonathan Winters.

When you watch Robin Williams, you can see a lot of Jonathan Winters. Robin is the first one to admit that; he worshiped Jonathan Winters.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing.

People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I'm one of those people that picks up the remote control and just keep hitting constantly, even if I like the show I'm watching.

I'm one of those people that picks up the remote control and just keep hitting constantly, even if I like the show I'm watching.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I wanted to be a brain surgeon, but I had a bad habit of dropping things.

I wanted to be a brain surgeon, but I had a bad habit of dropping things.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Well, I play Jews and parrots. Parrots are how I've branched out.

Well, I play Jews and parrots. Parrots are how I've branched out.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I just don't accept midgets as human beings. There's only so much political correctness I can accept.

I just don't accept midgets as human beings. There's only so much political correctness I can accept.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I changed the face of comedy. I used to be funny.

I changed the face of comedy. I used to be funny.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I just split up with my girlfriend, but like the Japanese say, 'They'll be another one floating by any minute now.'

I just split up with my girlfriend, but like the Japanese say, 'They'll be another one floating by any minute now.'

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Any misfortune that happens to another person is funny. If it happens to someone else and not me, it's very funny.

Any misfortune that happens to another person is funny. If it happens to someone else and not me, it's very funny.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I'd like to have a kid, but I'd probably get a Frank Sinatra Jr. instead of a Gilbert Gottfried Jr. I'd totally screw up like that.

I'd like to have a kid, but I'd probably get a Frank Sinatra Jr. instead of a Gilbert Gottfried Jr. I'd totally screw up like that.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I've done a lot of Fox shows since then - Married with Children, Living Single and a whole bunch of other Fox things.

I've done a lot of Fox shows since then - Married with Children, Living Single and a whole bunch of other Fox things.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever.

The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.

If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: There are certain things I don't want to joke about. If it's about somebody else, it's fine. If it's about me, I think it's totally insensitive!

There are certain things I don't want to joke about. If it's about somebody else, it's fine. If it's about me, I think it's totally insensitive!

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Japan is really advanced. They don't go to the beach. The beach comes to them.

Japan is really advanced. They don't go to the beach. The beach comes to them.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: You never know what people will choose to be offended by.

You never know what people will choose to be offended by.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.

I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: R2D2 has gotten more work since "Star Wars" than Carrie Fisher

R2D2 has gotten more work since "Star Wars" than Carrie Fisher

Gilbert Gottfried quotes: Off-camera, I sound like Perry Como.

Off-camera, I sound like Perry Como.