Brian Regan quotes: wise famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Brian Regan

Brian Regan Famous Quotes & Sayings

Discover top inspirational quotes from Brian Regan on Wise Famous Quotes.

Brian Regan quotes: I wasn't expecting to really draw in respected comedians but it's going to happen along the way and I'm truly honored by that.

I wasn't expecting to really draw in respected comedians but it's going to happen along the way and I'm truly honored by that.

Brian Regan quotes: I think the serving size of ice cream is when you hear the spoon hit the bottom of the container.

I think the serving size of ice cream is when you hear the spoon hit the bottom of the container.

Brian Regan quotes: Do not stand directly in front of a cannon ... how true that is.

Do not stand directly in front of a cannon ... how true that is.

Brian Regan quotes: I could go for a sandwich, but I'm not gonna open two jars.

I could go for a sandwich, but I'm not gonna open two jars.

Brian Regan quotes: I am happy doing standup so I don't ever want to stop doing it. But I wouldn't mind venturing off and doing other things that are creative.

I am happy doing standup so I don't ever want to stop doing it. But I wouldn't mind venturing off and doing other things that are creative.

Brian Regan quotes: Racquetball is the only sport where simultaneously you can be looking at the ball and it'll hit you in the back of the head at 90 miles per hour.

Racquetball is the only sport where simultaneously you can be looking at the ball and it'll hit you in the back of the head at 90 miles per hour.

Brian Regan quotes: As long as I can make that audience one thing, one unit, then I'm okay with it. But, sometimes, the bigger the audience, the weirder it gets.

As long as I can make that audience one thing, one unit, then I'm okay with it. But, sometimes, the bigger the audience, the weirder it gets.

Brian Regan quotes: Be adaptable, flexible and never stop learning. The rate of change will never stop and neither should you.

Be adaptable, flexible and never stop learning. The rate of change will never stop and neither should you.

Brian Regan quotes: Do people who believe in reincarnation ever say, Darn, I'm still writing the year 1612 on my checks!

Do people who believe in reincarnation ever say, Darn, I'm still writing the year 1612 on my checks!

Brian Regan quotes: Hey, you know who I feel bad for? Arab-Americans who truly want to get into crop dusting.

Hey, you know who I feel bad for? Arab-Americans who truly want to get into crop dusting.

Brian Regan quotes: If you tell a kid not to run to a water slide, he/she will walk for 2 steps, then start running again.

If you tell a kid not to run to a water slide, he/she will walk for 2 steps, then start running again.

Brian Regan quotes: Hooked on Phonics worked for me

Hooked on Phonics worked for me

Brian Regan quotes: The funnest jokes for me to tell are the ones that are the newest. So I'm just constantly motivated to keep my eyes and ears open and have new stuff.

The funnest jokes for me to tell are the ones that are the newest. So I'm just constantly motivated to keep my eyes and ears open and have new stuff.

Brian Regan quotes: Go my favorite sports team go! Score a goal. Unit. Basket. Go squadron! Defeat the opponents soundly in this ... skirmish.

Go my favorite sports team go! Score a goal. Unit. Basket. Go squadron! Defeat the opponents soundly in this ... skirmish.

Brian Regan quotes: If you were to second guess your decision to book some time to visit an Indian community, that would be a reservation reservation reservation.

If you were to second guess your decision to book some time to visit an Indian community, that would be a reservation reservation reservation.

Brian Regan quotes: Why are people getting on elevators shocked to find people getting off elevators?

Why are people getting on elevators shocked to find people getting off elevators?

Brian Regan quotes: It means a lot to me to have my kids like what I do. And that's why I limit them. But I don't want to put that pressure on them

It means a lot to me to have my kids like what I do. And that's why I limit them. But I don't want to put that pressure on them to be a fan of mine.

Brian Regan quotes: I eat Fig Newtons by the sleeve!

I eat Fig Newtons by the sleeve!

Brian Regan quotes: Don't let dialog about your company happen without your perspective.

Don't let dialog about your company happen without your perspective.

Brian Regan quotes: I took a speed reading course and my speed shot up to 43 pages a minute, but my comprehension plummeted.

I took a speed reading course and my speed shot up to 43 pages a minute, but my comprehension plummeted.

Brian Regan quotes: Brian, relax, man. You've gotta relax when you make the crank calls.

Brian, relax, man. You've gotta relax when you make the crank calls.

Brian Regan quotes: I like the honesty of standup comedy. People don't fake laugh. If they're truly laughing at you, you know they like you.

I like the honesty of standup comedy. People don't fake laugh. If they're truly laughing at you, you know they like you.

Brian Regan quotes: Mmmm! Lunch and no clean up!! Can life get better? I submit that it CANNOT!!

Mmmm! Lunch and no clean up!! Can life get better? I submit that it CANNOT!!

Brian Regan quotes: MOOSEN!!!!!!! There many MOOSEN in the WOODSEN! MANY MUCH MOOSEN! The Meisin wanted and the MOOSEN and ...

MOOSEN!!!!!!! There many MOOSEN in the WOODSEN! MANY MUCH MOOSEN! The Meisin wanted and the MOOSEN and ...

Brian Regan quotes: Don't like when sports interviewers force answers: Are you dedicating this game to your sick grandmother? What's the guy supposed to say?

Don't like when sports interviewers force answers: Are you dedicating this game to your sick grandmother? What's the guy supposed to say?

Brian Regan quotes: So, what are you in for? MANSLAUGHTER!!! I SLAUGHTERED A MAN!! JUST LIKE A PIG!!! PUT HIM ON A SPIT AND PUT AN APPLE IN HIS MOUTH!!!!

So, what are you in for? MANSLAUGHTER!!! I SLAUGHTERED A MAN!! JUST LIKE A PIG!!! PUT HIM ON A SPIT AND PUT AN APPLE IN HIS MOUTH!!!!

Brian Regan quotes: It's good to be here. I'm just trying to go through life without looking stupid. It's not working out too well.

It's good to be here. I'm just trying to go through life without looking stupid. It's not working out too well.

Brian Regan quotes: Read read good...

Read read good...

Brian Regan quotes: I drove myself to the Emergency Room. That's a nice relaxing drive. "Noooo, after you. Merge-everybody merge."

I drove myself to the Emergency Room. That's a nice relaxing drive. "Noooo, after you. Merge-everybody merge."

Brian Regan quotes: I don't know. I'd be a lot better off if I would've studied more when I was growing up, you know?

I don't know. I'd be a lot better off if I would've studied more when I was growing up, you know?

Brian Regan quotes: If Einstein was so smart how come people only call you 'Einstein' when you do something really stupid ?

If Einstein was so smart how come people only call you 'Einstein' when you do something really stupid ?

Brian Regan quotes: You got to figure out how to eat your snack while your elbows are touching. You got to learn how to twist your little plastic utensil.

You got to figure out how to eat your snack while your elbows are touching. You got to learn how to twist your little plastic utensil.

Brian Regan quotes: Hey, lay off the dairy. And uh, no more happiness.

Hey, lay off the dairy. And uh, no more happiness.

Brian Regan quotes: Some people look at creamed corn and ask, 'Why?' I look at creamed corn and ask, 'Why not?'

Some people look at creamed corn and ask, 'Why?' I look at creamed corn and ask, 'Why not?'

Brian Regan quotes: I'm trying to do things I have never done. Like I recently went to 3 different ballets. And I loved trying to learn how to like those a little bit.

I'm trying to do things I have never done. Like I recently went to 3 different ballets. And I loved trying to learn how to like those a little bit.

Brian Regan quotes: The bigger the show, the weirder it is.

The bigger the show, the weirder it is.

Brian Regan quotes: THE BIG YELLOW ONE IS THE SUN!!!

THE BIG YELLOW ONE IS THE SUN!!!