Artie Lange Quotes
Top 57 wise famous quotes and sayings by Artie Lange
Artie Lange Famous Quotes & Sayings
Discover top inspirational quotes from Artie Lange on Wise Famous Quotes.
Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.
I have a bad gambling problem. You're not in show business for 12 years and dress like this without a bad gambling problem.
The Howard Stern Show is a big hit because it entertains dumb and smart people at the same time for different reasons.
I used to be a longshoreman. I didn't go to college. I have a voice that when I say something, it can sound way meaner than you think it is.
It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.
I had a career before the Stern show, on Mad TV. I was on the first two seasons of that and I got kicked off it because of possession of cocaine.
Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that.
You know you have a gambling problem when it's 4 A.M. at the Mirage Sports Book and you're walking around going, 'Hey you get the lacrosse scores?'
I once dealt with a prima donna on a movie set. I won't say who, but his first name is a country. A communist country. Run by Fidel Castro.
For a degenerate like me, Vegas is like a walk down memory lane. Last time I went to Vegas, I went to my old coke dealer's kid's bar mitzvah.
I've never been swimming, and that's because it's never been more than half an hour since I last ate.
Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.
Well I have a drug history and a public drinking problem and I am not the healthiest guy. So they just ran that I died of a drug overdose.
To tell you the truth, there are all these websites predicting my early death, and it's starting to work on me!
But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.
Historically, a successful life in comedy is a dream that's as equally pondered and unpursued as being an astronaut.
Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.
Hugs are great, but - better than drugs? Come on. Let me put it to you this way: I never drove to Harlem at 4 a.m. to get somebody to hug me.
Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.